Part 20 (1/2)
”Can I help you?”
Octavia got everyone's attention. Wide eyes, coughs, and an immediate search for something to make themselves look busy.
The lead cop said, ”Octavia VanderPlatts?”
”You already know. Can I ask why the f.u.c.k you woke me up?”
Alice hung back with me, arms crossed and hair mussed. ”This sort of thing happened before?”
I shook my head. ”Not that I know of. She's been growing the stuff for about fifteen years.”
The lead cop turned to Octavia and handed over his warrant. ”This allows us to search the greenhouse in your backyard for marijuana, and also your house.”
She scanned the paper, shook her head, and said, ”No, no, I insist I have my attorney look at this before anyone looks at anything.”
The cop sighed. ”Look, as I was telling Mr. Belvedere, that's not an option. You allow us to search. If you get in our way, we cuff you. Back of the car. One way or the other, you know?”
She looked past him at Jennings and said, ”Call Pamela, make sure she-”
”Hey, hey, wait.” The cop stepped between them, spreading his arms. ”What part of what I just said-”
”Make sure she calls this judge first, Judge...Holm, it looks like. Call Judge Holm before coming over.”
Jennings nodded and started for the study, but the lead cop snapped his fingers and pointed. One of his cronies in uniform descended on Jennings, pus.h.i.+ng him against the wall and tying plastic restraints on his wrists.
”No!” Octavia was ready to tangle. She took a step in that direction, but the lead cop's arm went like steel and held her back.
”I told you already. After the search, we'll see about the attorney. But right now, I'm about to tell my guys it's fair game. And if you'd like to join your manservant here in cuffs, I'm happy to oblige.”
I promise you, I s.h.i.+elded my eyes just in case laserbeams came out of Octavia's.
TWO.
The cop then glanced towards Alice and me at the foot of the stairs, keeping our mouths shut. He chinned towards us. ”Sorry to interrupt your nap, but we've got a job to do.”
Octavia stabbed a finger in towards poor Jennings against the wall.”That job involves hara.s.sing my help?”
”If they get in our way. Maybe you'd like a female officer to accompany you while you put some clothes on?”
She held steady. ”I'm fine like I am. I'll need to supervise this search of yours, because I'm sure it's illegal and I'll need to report all irregularities to my attorney.”
”Are you s.h.i.+tting me? I already told you-”
”Try me, okay? This strong-arm bulls.h.i.+t might work on a lot of your street wh.o.r.es when you're conning b.l.o.w. .j.o.bs off them, but you knew the minute you rolled up to this house that you were going to have some fun. This is your O.J. moment. Some rich b.i.t.c.h getting what's coming to her, might be a little uneducated in the law, so you keep me away from my attorney and threaten my employees. Look at him.” She waved toward Jennings and his keeper. ”Hara.s.sing a f.a.ggot who didn't even touch you. Didn't even resist. All he was going to do was make a phone call until your macho a.s.s decided to play rough. Is that how you'd like to leave your job? Because I'm sure if you keep it up, we can add plenty of other reasons to the list.”
I couldn't tell if she had called their bluff or wore them down, but the lead cop finally mumbled towards the uniform to let Jennings go, then said, ”Lead the way.”
There was her grin, the evil one broadcasting to everyone that this was her house. I had no idea how she was going to talk her way out of what was in that greenhouse, though. I often wondered if she and Jennings had some sort of secret plan cooked up just in case-like a series of alarms so that one could hold off the police at the door while the other pressed a hidden b.u.t.ton that transformed the greenhouse from a cannabis paradise into a tropical flower garden through a series of sliding panels and lazy susans. But now it seemed I had my answer: Nope.
Alice, Jennings, and I followed Octavia and the lead cop through the house, while we were followed by two uniforms and the DEA guy. Past the hallway full of Frank Frazetta paintings-originals that Octavia had bought at auction-and barbarian weaponry. Through the kitchen, where Octavia's new chef Harriet would be working in just over an hour to begin breakfast, and into a back room I don't believe I'd ever seen before. It was apparently supposed to be a family room, but Octavia had instead filled it with wooden crates and framed art wrapped in paper. There were also several filing cabinets and plastic containers full of paperwork. Probably all leftover research and paperwork from her legal cases, but it somehow ruined the image of her as being above it all.
I had known about the out-of-court settlements she won, most after she and Pamela had demonstrated to the other side what sweet torture they were in store for should they insist on continuing. However, with the luxurious gothic facade, I'd been lured into thinking many of these defendants just gave up after one session with Octavia, thus giving her whatever she desired. To see the mounds of paperwork, the things she deemed unworthy of keeping at her fingertips but still worthy of shoving into some useless back room, reminded me of just how much effort had gone into Octavia's pursuit of wealth and power.
Also in this room was a sliding door leading out onto a mostly empty patio slab. Very small and out of place. A wonder she hadn't had it removed during her first week her. An oversight? An eccentricity? I didn't really understand.
We kept onward, through the door and into the yard, where the cool summer morning air gave me gooseb.u.mps and had me worried that my c.o.c.k might act up again and rise through the gap in my boxer shorts, especially with Alice in her skivvies. I wasn't that attracted to her, but she did have a way about her when she wasn't wearing much.
Octavia bravely stomped onward, right up to the officers in bulletproof vests and ski masks, waiting for the greenlight to storm the joint. She flapped the warrant around like it was a brochure for a tourist trap. ”Gentlemen, you will not break anything. If you can't do this without treating the plants and the building with respect, there will be repercussions in court. Loud f.u.c.king sonic booms, understand?”
They looked to the lead cop, obvious confusion in their eyes, and waiting for something. Anything.
He gave them a dismissive wave and a scowl. ”What are you waiting for? In! Get in there!”
The cops were about to smash the door in when Octavia shouted out, ”Stop!”
They all looked at her.
”Jennings, the key, please. Give them the key.”
Of course, he produced it from his slacks, stepped across to the bulletproofed, ski-masked behemoth, and placed it in his palm.
”Thank you,” Ski mask said.
Then he gave the order to smash it in anyway.
We stood around as flashbulbs lit up the greenhouse walls and cops shouted out the different varieties of marijuana Octavia was growing in there. They seemed more impressed than morally outraged. I supposed the tras.h.i.+ng of the plants would occur only after they had pulled us all out of the scene. We weren't sure what they were waiting for.
We found ourselves in a little circle, carefully watched by the cops but still allowed to talk since we most likely weren't going to say anything illegal, I hoped. I was new at this sort of thing.
Octavia spoke without moving her lips. ”Jennings, where is your cell phone?”
”Sorry, it's in my bedside drawer. You know, it rang last week during that meeting, and you said-”
”Fine, G.o.dd.a.m.nit, but since when do you ever listen to me?”
His face tightened. ”When you threaten to dock a hundred bucks for each ring.”
”Just get her here! Does it look like we can joke around? Who would've told them about the greenhouse?”
I said, ”How many people know besides us and Harriet?”
”She's the new girl. And all of the sudden-” Jennings made starbursts with his fingers. ”All the sudden.”
”Too sudden, then. Us, Pamela, Harriet, and...maybe the guy who sells me the seeds. s.h.i.+t, that's just what I need. Anyone else? Mick, how much do you tell that new b.i.t.c.h of yours?”
I started to defend Stephanie, but what was the point? Then I wondered, if I didn't defend her, would Octavia think I was the one who told the cops?