Chapter 2 - Burning Stoves Kitchen (1/2)
Chapter 2: Burning Stoves Kitchen
The Spirit River Sect was located in the Eastern Forest continent, in an area surrounding one of the Tong Tian River’s lower branches. Sprawled across both the north and south river banks, with a history of over ten thousand years, it was feared but respected across the world.
Eight towering mountains swathed in swirling mist lay in a line beside the Tong Tian River. Four on the northern bank, three on the southern bank, and in the middle of the Tong Tian River protruded the most majestic mountain peak of them all.
Half of the mountain was covered entirely in dazzling white snow. The mountaintop could barely be seen because of its sheer height. What could be seen though, was that the bottom half of the mountain had been hollowed out, allowing the golden waters of the river to rush through this opening. The cliff-faces on both sides of the crevice towered over the violent current like a bridge.
At that moment, a streak of rainbow light soared rapidly over the southern side of the Spirit River Sect. Wrapped in the shifting rainbow were the middle-aged cultivator Li Qinghou and Bai Xiaochun. Even as the rainbow streak disappeared into the Handyman District located beneath the third mountain, Bai Xiaochun’s screams of terror could still be faintly heard.
Bai Xiaochun was scared to death as he flew with Li Qinghou, dangling above countless lofty mountains. His body overtaken by uncontrollable terror, he had almost released his grip on the cultivator’s thigh multiple times.
In his adrenaline, the scenery in front of him was but a blur. When his vision finally cleared, he had already arrived outside an ordinary-looking loft. As he touched the earth once more with trembling legs, he looked around him. Comparing this environment to his village was like comparing Heaven and Earth. It was as though he had entered a whole new world.
Beside the attic in front of him protruded a huge boulder. Three characters were masterfully written on its surface in lively and vigorous calligraphic strokes:
‘The Handyman Department’.
A woman whose face was thickly dotted with pock-marks, had been sitting beside the stone. She stood up instantly when she spotted Li Qinghou, then politely saluted to him.
“Send this kid to the Burning Stoves Kitchen,” said Li Qinghou, without even sparing a glance towards Bai Xiaochun. He turned around, once again transforming into a rainbow streak, and flew off into the distance.
Upon hearing the words ‘Burning Stoves Kitchen’, the pock-marked woman’s face momentarily blanked. Sweeping her measuring gaze across Bai Xiaochun, she wordlessly handed him one of the fabric bags that had been prepared for every sect worker before expressionlessly listing all the basic rules of the sect to Bai Xiaochun. As the pair ventured out of the attic, they passed by various intricately designed patios and countless other pavilions, constructed with simplistic elegance. The road was paved with azure quartz and the air was suffused with the gentle, refreshing aroma of flowers and fresh herbs. It was as though they had stepped into the realm of the gods. As Bai Xiaochun appreciated the exquisite environment, the anxiety that had filled his heart earlier dissipated.
“What a nice place... This is so much better than my village.” murmured Bai Xiaochun, the anticipation clear in his eyes. The further he walked, the more beautiful the surrounding environment became. When he even saw a few delicate beauties walk past, he instantly felt endeared to this wonderful place.
A short while later, Bai Xiaochun became even happier. Because at the end of the road in front of him was a seven-story crystal building shining with a radiant light. Overhead, a dozen cranes, the epitome of elegance, soared past.
“Sister, have we arrived?” asked Bai Xiaochun in excitement.
“Hmm, over there.” The pock-marked woman replied blandly, her expression remained emotionless even as she pointed a finger towards the end of a side path.
As Bai Xiaochun looked in that direction with a heart full of anticipation, his entire body turned as stiff as a block of ice. He rubbed his eyes in disbelief and stared harder, but the scene that greeted him remained the same. That small side path was strewn with cracked earth and broken flagstones. The surrounding area lay in a state of disrepair, with straw houses scattered everywhere. From within a few of those straw huts emanated a strong stench …
Bai Xiaochun felt like crying, but was unable to shed a tear. Grasping desperately for his last strand of hope, he turned towards the pock-marked woman with an imploring face.
“Sister, you must have pointed in the wrong direction...”
“No.” The woman’s response was curt as she stepped onto the small trail. Hearing that, all of Bai Xiaochun’s fantasies instantly shattered. He could only follow after the pock-marked woman with a bitter face.
They had not walked long before he spotted the end of the the shoddily-constructed path, where there were a few huge black pots darting about. Upon closer inspection, he realised that underneath each of those pots was a huge obese man. All of them looked like irreparable gluttons; it seemed that the moment you poked one of them, nothing but oil would ooze out of the pores of his skin. They were incomparably, abnormally fat. Especially the one who had been standing beside a cottage -- he was a massive, bulging mountain of meat. Bai Xiaochun feared that at any moment, he would explode.
Surrounded by hundreds of huge pots filled with rice, these fat men had been pouring water into them to soften the grains.
Sensing that someone had arrived, the fattest man looked up. The moment he spotted the pock-marked lady, that mountain of meat’s expression instantly lit up, and an overjoyed grin appeared on his face. Carrying a large ladle, he ran straight towards the pair, causing the earth to shake under his mass as his rolls of fat trembled and rippled with the sudden movement. Bai Xiaochun stared at the scene in disbelief, subconsciously feeling the urge to look for an axe.
“This morning, when I heard the magpies sing, I wondered what good fortune would happen today. So it’s because you’ve come to visit! My dear Sister, could it be that you’ve had a change of heart and noticed my many talents? Let’s take advantage of this prosperous day. You and me, let’s get together.” The fat mountain’s eyes shone with perverted thoughts as he yelled emotionally while running.
“I’m just delivering this kid to your Burning Stoves Kitchen. And now that he’s here, goodbye!” After the pock-marked woman saw the mountain of fat, her expression instantly turned ugly. Her irritation was clear as she rapidly retreated.
Bai Xiaochun inhaled sharply. He had observed the pock-marked women during their short trip together, and he finally reached a conclusion: her appearance must have been painted by a ghost! Just what kind of taste did that fat man have? How could he be so horny when faced with such a woman?!
Even before Bai Xiaochun had completed this thought, the mountain of meat had already arrived before him, huffing and puffing. With his bulk, he blocked the sun entirely as his shadow covered Bai Xiaochun.
As he raised his head to stare at the mountain of meat whose rolls of fat were still quivering, Bai Xiaochun swallowed nervously. In his life, he had never seen such a fat man!
The enormous man pitifully tore his eyes away from the spot where the pock-marked woman had been standing and glanced at Bai Xiaochun.
“Whoo, so we have a new guy here. Kid, to take the place of Xu Baocai who was arranged to join our kitchen, you’ve got some background.” said the fat man.
“Brother, my...my humble name is Bai Xiaochun.” Under the pressure exerted by the sheer bulk of the other man, Bai Xiaochun subconsciously took a few steps back.
“Bai Xiaochun? Hm... your skin is white and your body is small and delicate… Good, good! Your name suits my tastes perfectly,” the fat man said as his eyes lit up. When he patted Bai Xiaochun’s bony shoulder, the boy nearly collapsed to the ground.
[TL: Bai Xiaochun’s name directly translates into ‘small, white, pure’.]
“Brother, may I ask for your name?” Bai Xiaochun took a deep breath as he rolled his eyes and shot a disdainful glare at the wall of wobbling fat before him. In his mind, he was already thinking of ways to mock the fat man using his name.