Vol 1 Chapter 5.2 (1/2)

VOLUME 1

Well then, next is the student council vice president, Sugisaki Ken-san.

–

“Ah, everyone. This is the vice president, Sugisaki Ken… hey, you people over there! Don’t boo just because I’m not the president! Is there something about having a pretty boy up here like me that doesn’t satisfy you?! … Hey, why is everyone booing me at once?! You all have got some nerve! If you just think I’m just that guy who likes eroge, you couldn’t be more wrong! I’ll cut you all down at once with these mighty arms I honed by playing Dynasty Warriors (1)… ah, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please stop! Don’t throw things! I’m sorry! The vice president is your humble, obedient servant!

“Sigh... W, Well, I’ll leave that around there for today, hmph.

“Anyways, here’s what I really want to talk about… come on, stop booing! Also, Cla.s.s B from Year 2, stop covering your ears! Hey, Minatsu, why the h.e.l.l are you egging them on?!

“Alright, alright, quiet down! Quiet down, you idiots… uwaah?! W, Who the h.e.l.l just threw a shuriken?! I could feel that through my hair! Also, that was a real shuriken, wasn’t it?! What the h.e.l.l kind of characters do we have in this student body?! We even have ninja in here?!

“If the ninja’s a pretty girl, then I’m fine with it, but if that’s not the case I’ll kill you! Prepare youself… uwaah! What the h.e.l.l is this? A lightning bolt?! Using a lightning bolt indoors is just way past common sense! How much d.a.m.n chakra do you have?! Are you possessed by a nine-tailed fox or something?! (2)

“A, Ahem. Hey, you a.s.sholes. The president is glaring at you. Let me get on with what I have to say.”

………

“… So all it takes is mentioning the president for you lot to calm down? … Well, whatever.

“Lately, there has been a moral problem inside this school. In particular, morals in s.e.xual matters.

“… Alright. I completely expected you all to give me that look. Ahh, it doesn’t hurt at all! My heart isn’t hurting at all!

“Listen up, you lot! It’s true, I love eroge! But think about it in reverse! I love eroge precisely because my s.e.xual desires can’t be satisfied in real life! Do you understand?! So my body is actually quite pure and chaste! No matter how sad that is to say!

“… Hey. Just stop it. Don’t give me those sympathetic looks. It hurts. It actually hurts.”

Ahem.

“Well, anyways, even for someone like me, seeing too many people flirting in school is a bother. It just makes me want to kill something. You guys too… even people who are dating, doesn’t it annoy you even a bit when you see other people flirting? You can’t say it absolutely doesn’t, right?”

“This doesn’t only apply to matters of love. You should show moderation in everything you do. I know how you feel. I know that you want to flirt. After all, my own goal is to do stuff like thaaaaaaat and thiiiiiiis in the student council room with the four others.”

……

“Hey, cut it out, ninja. Isn’t aiming a throwing knife at my forehead overdoing it?! You, if I didn’t have the reflexes I have, that would have been a direct hit, you know!