Volume IX Part 29 (2/2)
But thy these wamblings in thy cursed gizzard, and thy awkward grimaces, I see thou'rt but a novice in it yet!--Ah, Belford, Belford, thou hast a confounded parcel of briers and thorns to trample over barefoot, before religion will illuminate these gloomy features!'
I give your Lords.h.i.+p this account, in answer to your desire to know, if I think him the man he was.
In our conversation at dinner, he was balancing whether he should set out the next morning, or the morning after. But finding he had nothing to do, and Col. Morden being in town, (which, however, I told him not of,) I turned the scale; and he agreed upon setting out to-morrow morning; they to see him embark; and I promised to accompany them for a morning's ride (as they proposed their horses); but said, that I must return in the afternoon.
With much reluctance they let me go to my evening's appointment: they little thought with whom: for Mr. Lovelace had put it as a case of honour to all of us, whether, as he had been told that Mr. Morden and Mr. James Harlowe had thrown out menaces against him, he ought to leave the kingdom till he had thrown himself in their way.
Mowbray gave his opinion, that he ought to leave it like a man of honour as he was; and if he did not take those gentlemen to task for their opprobrious speeches, that at least he should be seen by them in public before he went away; else they might give themselves airs, as if he had left the kingdom in fear of them.
To this he himself so much inclined, that it was with difficulty I persuaded him, that, as they had neither of them proceeded to a direct and formal challenge; as they knew he had not made himself difficult of access; and as he had already done the family injury enough; and it was Miss Harlowe's earnest desire, that he would be content with that; he had no reason, from any point of honour, to delay his journey; especially as he had so just a motive for his going, as the establis.h.i.+ng of his health; and as he might return the sooner, if he saw occasion for it.
I found the Colonel in a very solemn way. We had a good deal of discourse upon the subject of certain letters which had pa.s.sed between us in relation to Miss Harlowe's will, and to her family. He has some accounts to settle with his banker; which, he says, will be adjusted to-morrow; and on Thursday he proposes to go down again, to take leave of his friends; and then intends to set out directly for Italy.
I wish Mr. Lovelace could have been prevailed upon to take any other tour, than that of France and Italy. I did propose Madrid to him; but he laughed at me, and told me, that the proposal was in character from a mule; and from one who was become as grave as a Spaniard of the old cut, at ninety.
I expressed to the Colonel my apprehensions, that his cousin's dying injunctions would not have the force upon him that were to be wished.
'They have great force upon me, Mr. Belford,' said he; 'or one world would not have held Mr. Lovelace and me thus long. But my intention is to go to Florence; and not to lay my bones there, as upon my cousin's death I told you I thought to do; but to settle all my affairs in those parts, and then to come over, and reside upon a little paternal estate in Kent, which is strangely gone to ruin in my absence. Indeed, were I to meet Mr. Lovelace, either here or abroad, I might not be answerable for the consequence.'
He would have engaged me for to-morrow. But having promised to attend Mr. Lovelace on his journey, as I have mentioned, I said, I was obliged to go out of town, and was uncertain as to the time of my return in the evening. And so I am to see him on Thursday morning at my own lodgings.
I will do myself the honour to write again to your Lords.h.i.+p to-morrow night. Mean time, I am, my Lord,
Your Lords.h.i.+p's, &c.
LETTER LIII
MR. BELFORD, TO LORD M.
WEDN. NIGHT, OCT. 4.
MY LORD,
I am just returned from attending Mr. Lovelace as far as Gad's-Hill, near Rochester. He was exceeding gay all the way. Mowbray and Tourville are gone on with him. They will see him embark, and under sail; and promise to follow him in a month or two; for they say, there is no living without him, now he is once more himself.
He and I parted with great and even solemn tokens of affection; but yet not without gay intermixtures, as I will acquaint your Lords.h.i.+p.
Taking me aside, and clasping his arms about me, 'Adieu, dear Belford!'
said he: 'may you proceed in the course you have entered upon!--Whatever airs I give myself, this charming creature has fast hold of me here-- [clapping his hand upon his heart]: and I must either appear what you see me, or be what I so lately was--O the divine creature!' lifting up his eyes----
'But if I live to come to England, and you remain fixed in your present way, and can give me encouragement, I hope rather to follow your example, than to ridicule you for it. This will [for I had given him a copy of it] I will make the companion of my solitary hours. You have told me a part of its melancholy contents; and that, and her posthumous letter, shall be my study; and they will prepare me for being your disciple, if you hold on.
'You, Jack, may marry,' continued he; 'and I have a wife in my eye for you.--Only thou'rt such an awkward mortal:' [he saw me affected, and thought to make me smile:] 'but we don't make ourselves, except it be worse by our dress. Thou art in mourning now, as well as I: but if ever thy ridiculous turn lead thee again to be beau-brocade, I will bedizen thee, as the girls say, on my return, to my own fancy, and according to thy own natural appearance----Thou shalt doctor my soul, and I will doctor thy body: thou shalt see what a clever fellow I will make of thee.
'As for me, I never will, I never can, marry--that I will not take a few liberties, and that I will not try to start some of my former game, I won't promise--habits are not so easily shaken off--but they shall be by way of wearing. So return and reform shall go together.
'And now, thou sorrowful monkey, what aileth thee?' I do love him, my Lord.
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