Part 3 (2/2)

And what's this nonsense about that Rikkan Addis being leader of our expedition? Magic users lead expeditions, and you know it.”

”Not this time,” he denied, shaking his head with just the hint of amus.e.m.e.nt behind his eyes- ”There are too many components of that group who would refuse to follow you no matter how strong a sorceress you are, and I can't repeat often enough how important it is that the group stay together. Rikkan Addis is more than just a natural leader; I know you couldn't feel that part of his talent working because it didn't affect you, but it was his belief that the task needed doing that swayed the others.

He doesn't just lead, he makes people follow, and that's why he's so valuable.”

”So that's why you were handling him so carefully,” I said, my eyes narrowing as I thought about it. ”You knew if you were able to convince him, die others would follow along. And if he thought you were lying, the others would believe the same. But that doesn't explain the mas- querade. If he finds out what you really look like, won't he consider that the same as lying?”

”Laciel, girl, the-masquerade, as you call it, wasn't done for him,” Graythor said with a sigh as he leaned back in his chair, but whether the sigh was one of weari- ness or exasperation, I couldn't tell. ”It so happens that as soon as you stop pestering me, I'll be calling on Rikkan Addis to chat-and incidentally show him what I really look like. He already knows from your earlier comments that this isn't my true form, and I don't want him to begin wondering.”

”If you didn't want him to begin wondering, you shouldn't have gotten involved with silly dress-up to begin with,” 1 said, now knowing what his sigh had meant. ”I 37.

know people have certain prejudices about wizards, but that doesn't mean you have to cater to them.”

”If you're asking them to risk their lives for you, mat's exactly what you do have to do,” he said, the snap in his voice and sharpness in his eyes clear indications of how close to anger he was. He looked to his right and my left, spoke the words that were necessary, then joined me in watching the chairs that stood there change immediately into a tall, wide mirror in an intricate frame of gold. The mirror showed me just as I was, tall and slender, tanned and violet-eyed with long platinum hair, my pale rose s.h.i.+rt and light gold slacks loose enough to keep from emphasiz- ing my figure, my short, soft leather boots of gold more for comfort than durability. The image of me was clear and accurate, but so was the image of a still-seated Graythor-which didn't match the form in the chair. Beard- less, dark of hair and eye, sallow complexion, short, nar- row, bent just a little but still extremely competent-looking- that was the Graythor I knew, and the one I would have recognized.

”Try to imagine yourself one of the others, child,” he said with less of the anger showing, the mirror-gesture 1 saw reflecting me movement only just visible from me corner of my eye- ”Your life has just been saved by someone who is a very powerful wizard, and in return for saving your life, he's asking you to risk it again on his behalf. People are strange, Laciel, and after you've lived among them for as long as I have, you'll leam that their grat.i.tude for an important favor can quicldy turn to resent- ment over being forced into a position to need to return that favor. One of die most important points in that is just exactly who you owe the favor to-and now you're one of mem and looking at me as I really am. What do you see?”

”I see-you,” 1 answered, having no idea what he was getting at. ”What else is there to see?”

”What there is to see is that you've known me too long,” he said, for some reason with a pleased chuckle, his true image smiling the crooked smile I'd so enjoyed as a child. ”What the others would see would be a mis- shapen, ugly little man who really shouldn't have been accorded the privilege of saving their lives, one who wasn't

38 .

at all up to deserving their grat.i.tude. Consciously they would never want to feel that way, but deep inside, where emotion rules in place of thought, they would have no choice. My altered shape gave them n.o.bility and wisdom to admire, size and strength to respect, power and age to be in awe of-and a tragic figure to sympathize with and help. My saving their lives is now incidental; what matters most to them at this point is that they have it within (heir power to help someone who would normally need no help, but who now requires their help. They're motivated, some- thing even an enslavement spell could not accomplish, and they'll see the job through to the end. All we have to take care of now is that single, important question buzzing around in your head.”

”What question?” I asked at once, looking at him sharply-but at the real him, the one in the mirror. ”What other question do you think 1 have?”

”Laciel, I've known you since you were a very little giri,” he said, the dark eyes in the mirror staring at me with a sober calm. ”You did something foolish and nearly died for it, and now you're wondering if mat's the real reason you're not leading the expedition. You're also wondering what you'll, have to do to prove how capable of leaders.h.i.+p you are after all, and that most likely before you all leave tomorrow. I'm telling you now that there's noth- ing you can-or had better-do to change the arrange- ments of this expedition as they stand, or you'll find yourself tied so fast and deep into an obedience spell that it will take you a year to See your way out of it. I need you badly for this task, but you cannot do it akme, and you cannot be me leader. Do you understand what I'm saying to you?”

”Of course I understand,” I answered with exasperated impatience, making no effort to avoid his eyes. If I couldn't do anything before we left then it would have to be after, but one way or another it had to be done. Magic users were the leaders of expeditions, and it would be stupid to allow any other precedent to be set. Besides, I knew I would make a better leader than that Rikkan Addis, espe- cially for so important an objective.

”Good,” he said with a nod of satisfaction, raising one 39.

hand in a vanis.h.i.+ng gesture to get rid of the mirror before rising from me seat. Without the mirror there was nothing but his altered form, which I had to look way up at. ”I can see now there's a good deal of truth to the saying about clouds and silver linings,” he observed with a smile as he put one giant but gentle hand to my face. ”If I hadn't been scanning around in my search for members of the expedi- tion, I never would have come across your entry onto the Plane of Dreams-or known what was happening. If you'd died I would have missed you, Laciel; after all, who would be left then who would criticize me as you do?”

”Don't worry. Uncle Graythor, I'll always be around to criticize you,” 1 a.s.sured him pleasantly, recognizing the teasing even if the face and form weren't familiar. ”Since everyone else is too afraid of you to do it, the job has to be mine.”

”So it does,” he agreed with a chuckle, turning to lead the way out of the room. ”Your accommodations are marked with a blue door, and you'll have no trouble finding mem. While you're resting you might consider cutting down some on all that courage you're so filled with. Where you're going, a bit of prudent cowardice will likely serve you better.”

”That's right, you did say you knew our ultimate desti- nation,” I realized aloud, looking'up at him again as we walked. ”You make it sound like we have no chance against it, but if we had no chance at all, you'd be wasting your time and our lives by sending us. What's me name of this deadly-dangerous repository of stolen articles?”

”The place you have to find an entrance into is called Cloud's Heart,” he answered, bending a much less-benign gaze on me than he had a moment earlier. ”Despite its name it is deadly dangerous, probably as much so as the journey you'll have getting there. I've never made me trip myself, but I've spoken to one or two who have, and nothing conceivable would ever get them to try it again. I wish I could send someone in your place, Laciel, but I can't. Just remember that, if-when you get there.”

”But where is it?” I asked, disturbed by the haunted look in the eyes that had left me. Graythor had stopped to stare straight ahead, and that bothered me more than any- 40.

thing he had said. He hesitated so long I thought he wasn't going to answer, and then he sighed with his gaze still held by the distance.

”It's on the Far Side of Forever,” he said in a whisper, then strode away so fast that I had no hope of catching up.

Not that I felt like catching up. I just stood there for a minute staring at the giant mstic dining room he'd disap- peared through, then went looking for the accommodations I suddenly felt a lot of need for.

CHAPTER 2.

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