Part 20 (1/2)

”Yet you won't help me into the Philomathean?”

”No.”

”So you'll make money out of me, but think your club too good?”

”I owe my club a duty.”

”I know,” he went on smoothly, ”that you're an awful screw, when there's a dollar in sight. How much do you want?”

My silence should have warned him, but he was too self-absorbed to feel anything but his own mood.

”How much do you want?” he repeated, and I still sat without speaking, though the room blurred, and I felt as if I were stifling. ”The day I'm elected to the Philomathean, I'll give you”--

I rose and interrupted him, saying, ”Mr. Whitely, if you wish me to leave your house and employment, you can obtain my absence in an easier way than by insulting me.”

For a moment we faced each other in silence, and then he rose.

”Hereafter, Dr. Hartzmann, you will pay those dues yourself,” he said in a low voice, as he moved towards the door.

I only bowed, glad that the matter was so easily ended; and for nearly two months our relations have been of the most formal kind that can exist between employer and employed.

Far more bitter was another break. When the moment of farewell came, that evening, I waited to put you and Mrs. Blodgett into your carriages, and while we were delayed in the vestibule you thanked me again for the pleasure of the previous afternoon, and then continued: ”I understand why you did not feel able to please Mrs. Blodgett about the concert. But won't you let me acknowledge the pleasure of yesterday by sending you a ticket? I have taken a number, and as all my circle have done the same, I am finding it rather difficult to get rid of them.”

”That's all right, Maizie,” interjected Mrs. Blodgett, who had caught, or inferred from an occasional word that she heard, what you were saying. ”We took an extra ticket, and I am going to use the doctor for an escort that evening.”

”I thank you both,” I answered, ”but I shall not be able to attend the concert.”

”Nonsense!” sniffed Mrs. Blodgett, as I helped her into her carriage.

”You're going to do as I tell you.”

You did not speak in the moment we waited for your coupe to take its place, but as the tiger opened the door you looked in my face for the first time since my words, showing me eyes that told of the pain I had inflicted.

”I am sorry,” you said quietly. ”I had thought--hoped--that we were to be friends.”

There was nothing for me to say, and we parted thus. From that time I have seen little of you, for when I meet you now you no longer make it possible for me to have much of your society. And my persistent refusal to go to the concert with Mrs. Blodgett and Agnes increased their irritation against me, so that I am no longer asked to their home, and thus have lost my most frequent opportunity of meeting you. But harder even than this deprivation is the thought that I have given you pain; made all the greater, perhaps, because so ill deserved and apparently unreasonable. I find myself longing for the hour when we shall meet at that far-away tribunal, where all our lives, and not alone that which is seen, will stand revealed. For two months I have not had a single moment of happiness or even hope. I am lonely and weary, while my strength and courage seem to lessen day by day. Oh, my darling, I pray G.o.d that thought of you will make me stronger and braver, that I may go on with my fight. Good-night.

XXII

_March 13._ Last night, at the Philomathean, Mr. Blodgett joined me, and asked me why I had not dined with them lately. He returned only a few days ago, and was thus ignorant that I have not been inside his door for weeks. I hesitated for an instant, and then replied, ”I have been working very hard.”

”What are you usually doing?” he asked, smiling. ”Come in to Sunday dinner to-morrow.”

”I shall be too busy with a lot of ma.n.u.scripts I have on hand, that must be read,” I told him.

”Stop killing yourself,” he ordered. ”As it is, you look as if you were on the brink of a bad illness. You won't get on a bit faster by dying young.”

There the matter rested, and I did not go to dinner to-day, being indeed glad to stay indoors; for I very foolishly walked up town yesterday through the slush, and caught a bad cold. While I was trying to keep warm, this evening, a note was brought me from Mr. Blodgett, asking me to come to him at once; and fearing something important, I braved the cold without delay, ill though I felt. I was shown at once into his den, which was so cheerful with its open fire that I felt it was a good exchange for my cold room, where I had sat coughing and s.h.i.+vering all the afternoon.

”Twice in my life I've really lost my temper with the boss,” he began, before I had even sat down, though he closed the door while speaking.