Part 22 (1/2)

=The Bridegroom's Relatives= should place themselves on entering at the right of the nave, thus being on the bridegroom's right hand, and seat themselves in pews. The relatives of the bride should place themselves on entering at the left of the nave, thus being on the bride's left hand, and seat themselves in pews or chairs. Large cards with the words ”For the Relatives of the Bridegroom,” ”For the Relatives of the Bride,”

are frequently placed in the pews to indicate where they are to sit.

=The Bride= should stand at the bridegroom's left hand; the bride's father, or nearest male relative, should stand at her left hand, in order to give her away.

The bridesmaids should stand immediately behind the bride in the order in which they pa.s.s up the church.

The bride should take off her gloves at the commencement of the service and should give them with her bouquet to the head bridesmaid to hold.

The invited guests should sit in the pews or chairs.

Guests seldom take their prayer-books with them to the church to follow the service therefrom. The hymns sung are usually printed on leaflets, and placed in the pews or on the seats.

The bridegroom generally wears a flower in his b.u.t.ton-hole, as he does not wear a wedding favour.

The other gentlemen may, as a matter of course, wear b.u.t.ton-hole bouquets, if they please.

=When the Service is concluded=, the bride should take the bridegroom's left arm, and, preceded by the officiating clergyman, and followed by her head bridesmaids, father, mother, and the most distinguished of the guests, should enter the vestry, where the register should be signed by the bride and bridegroom, two or three of the nearest relatives, and by two or three of the most intimate of the friends, and princ.i.p.al of the guests, including the best man and the head bridesmaid. The bride's father should sign it, but it is optional whether the bride's mother does so or not.

When the register has been signed, and those in the vestry have shaken hands with the bride and offered their congratulations, the bride should take the bridegroom's left arm and pa.s.s down the nave of the church followed by her bridesmaids, in the same order as they have previously pa.s.sed up the nave.

The bride and bridegroom usually leave the church without pausing to shake hands with many of their friends present if a reception is to follow.

When the bride and bridegroom have driven off from the church, the bride's mother should be the next to follow, that she may be at home to receive the guests as they arrive. There is no precedence as to the order in which the remainder of the company leave the church; it entirely depends on the cleverness of their servants in getting up their motor-cars.

=b.u.t.ton-hole Bouquets= of natural flowers have entirely superseded the old-fas.h.i.+oned wedding favours for both ladies and gentlemen, and are sometimes offered to the guests before they leave their seats at the conclusion of the ceremony, but not invariably so. b.u.t.ton-hole bouquets should be worn on the left side, by both ladies and gentlemen.

=A Bride who is a Widow= should not wear a bridal veil, nor a wreath of orange-blossoms, nor orange-blossom on her dress.

She should not be attended by bridesmaids, and wedding favours should not be worn by the guests.

=How the Invitations to the Wedding Reception of a Widow= should be issued depends upon individual circ.u.mstances. For instance, if a young widow resides with her parents, the invitations should be issued in their names as at her first marriage, and the form of invitation should be similar, save that the words ”Their daughter, Mrs. A., widow of Mr.

A.” should be subst.i.tuted for her christian name. If, as is very frequently the case, a widow resides in her own house, or if the marriage is to take place from an hotel, the invitations should be issued in her own name, and the form should be ”Mrs. Cecil A. requests the pleasure (or the honour) of Mr. and Mrs. B.'s company at her marriage with Mr. Henry C., at St. George's Church on Tuesday, December 30th, at 2.30 o'clock, and afterwards at Eaton Gardens, R.S.V.P.” ”The presence of” instead of ”the company of” may be put if preferred.

=It is understood that a Widow should not have Bridesmaids=, but it is open to her to have the attendance of pages, if a wedding is to be a fas.h.i.+onable and smart one, although many ladies do not avail themselves of this privilege. The bridegroom should have a best man, as a matter of course; he may be the bride's brother if desired (the idea that this is not permitted is an erroneous one). A married man might be asked to act in the capacity of best man, there being no bridesmaids to require his attention, although this is seldom done, and a bachelor brother or friend is preferred.

=A Widow may be given away= by her father, uncle, brother, or even by a friend; indeed, it is more usual to have this support than not. At a first marriage ”to be given away” is imperative, at a second it is optional; and if a widow at a quiet wedding prefers not to follow this custom she can do so.

=Much Uncertainty exists as to whether a Widow should or should not continue to wear her First Wedding Ring= when she marries a second time.

In point of fact there is no hard and fast rule with regard to it, and a widow may continue or not continue to wear it, as she feels inclined. If she has children, and has had some years of married life, she usually retains it. If she is a young widow, she is likely to remove it, and wear the second ring only; but when this is her intention, she should not cease to wear it until she has arrived at the church, and has taken off her gloves previous to the ceremony; but, take it all in all, it is more usual to wear the two wedding rings than the second one only.

=Formerly, Widows considered it Imperative to be married in Widow's Colours=, grey or mauve, and that white was forbidden wear; but it is no longer so regarded, and a widow may and does wear white or cream on her wedding-day--not exactly a maiden bridal dress, as a tinge of colour is introduced. The larger number still regard pale grey or pale heliotrope as more suitable on the occasion of a second marriage, and doubtless this is so when a widow is not in her first youth. A widow may not, of course, wear a bridal veil; she must wear a hat or toque, white or coloured, as she pleases. She can have a bouquet, not of white flowers only, but mauve or pink, or violets, according to choice. It is quite permissible to have a full choral service, and for the church in which the ceremony is performed to be decorated with plants and flowers, but wedding favours should not be given to the guests at its conclusion.