Part 13 (1/2)

'I don't think I want to marry anybody I think I'd rather ot to be practical, you know You've got to be practical in this world You want to ood lot of ood tis you ought to have'

'I only want to marry the person I want to s'

'Yes, but they are iirl They are i and romantic' He went on, 'My leave's up in another ten days I thought I'd better speak before I went Before that I thought I wouldn'tI thought that I'd wait But I think youwell, I think I'd like you just to know that I'm here When I come back in two years' time, if there isn't anybody'

'There won't be anyone,' I said I was quite positive

And so Reggie and I becae' systeed, but it would not be announced or put in the paper, and ould not tell our friends about it, though I think ie, 'e can't be married Why didn't you tell me sooner, then ould have had tiot to have brides and all the rest of it But anyway, I shouldn't dreaet married to ry over this, and ould al for him to be so ready to turn down ie had fixed ideas as to as due to the person he loved, and he had got it into his long, narrow head that the right thing for me to do was to marry a man with a place, h, ere very happy The Lucys all seeie had his eye on you, Aggie, for soirl friends Still, there's no hurry Better give yourself plenty of time'

There were one or two moments hat I had enjoyed soplenty of tionisie to say that he couldn't possibly wait two years, that we gie would have drea He was a very unselfish man, and diffident about himself and his prospects

My ement She said, 'I have always been fond of him I think he is one of the nicest people I have ever entle and kind, and he will never hurry you, or bother you You won't be very well off, but you will have enough now that he has reached the rank of ht You're not the sort of person who cares very ay life No, I think this will be a happy ht pause, 'I wish he'd told you a little earlier, so that you could have ht away'

So she, too, felt as I did Ten days later, Reggie left to go back to his Regiment and I settled down to wait for him

Let me add here a kind of postscript to my account of my courtshi+p days

I have described my suitorsbut, rather unfairly, have not commented on the fact that I, too, lostsoldier, who in Yorkshi+re If he had asked me to marry him, I should probably have said yes before the words were out of his mouth! Very wisely from his point of view, he didn't He was a penniless subaltern, and about to go to India with his regih He had that sheep-like look I had to make do with that He went off to India, and I yearned after him for at least six ain, when acting in a ot up by friends in Torquaya version of Bluebeard, Bluebeard, with topical words, written by themselves I was Sister Anne, and the object ofthenat the beginning of his career I had the revolting habit of singing to a teddy bear in a coy fashi+on the song of the moment: with topical words, written by themselves I was Sister Anne, and the object ofthenat the beginning of his career I had the revolting habit of singing to a teddy bear in a coy fashi+on the song of the moment: I wish I had a Teddy BearTo sit upon my kneeI'd take it with me everywhereTo cuddle up to irls did that sort of thingand it went down very well

Several tiainsince he was a cousin of friendsbut I always ed to avoid it I have my vanity

I have always believed that he has a ht picnic on Anstey's Cove on the last day of his leave We sat apart fro out to sea We didn't speakjust sat there holding hands

After he left he sent h to want him still to re thirteen stone of solid flesh and what could only be described as 'a kind face'

'Amyas always asks after you,' ain'

Meet me at a ripe sixty? No fear I would like to be an illusion still to somebody

VII

Happy people have no history, isn't that the saying? Well, I was a happy person during this period I did s as usual: met my friends, went to stay away occasionallybut there was anxiety about ressively worse She had great difficulty in reading now, and trouble seeing things in a bright light Spectacles did not help My grand was also rather blind, and had to peer about for things She was also getting, as elderly people do, progressively more suspicious of everybody: of her servants, of men who came to mend the pipes, of the piano tuner, and so on I always re, either tosound'Speak lohere is your bag?' where is your bag?'

'In my room, Grannie'

'You've left left it there? You mustn't leave it there I heard it there? You mustn't leave it there I heard her, her, upstairs, just now' upstairs, just now'

'Well, but that's all right, isn't it?'

'You never know, dear, you never know Go up and fetch it'

It must have been about this time that my mother'son the top of buses, and I suppose by now hty Anyway, the bus went on suddenly as she was co downstairs, and she fell off; broke, I think, a rib, and possibly an arour, arded handsome compensationand sternly forbidden by her doctor ever to ride on the top of a bus again Naturally, being Granny B, she disobeyed him constantly Up to the last Granny B was always the old soldier She had an operation, too, soine it was cancer of the uterus, but the operation was entirely successful, and she never had any recurrence The only deep disappoint this 'tumour', or whatever it was, reht, she would be quite nice and slier than randmother The joke of the fat woman as stuck in the bus door, with the bus conductor crying to her, 'Try sideways, ot no sideways!' could have applied perfectly to her no sideways!' could have applied perfectly to her

Though strictly forbidden to get out of bed by the nurses after she had come out of the anaesthetic, and they had left her to sleep, she rose frolass What a disillusion She appeared to be as stout as ever

'I shall never get over the disappointment, Clara,' she said to h that anaesthetic and everything And look at me: just the sae and I had a discussion which was to bear fruit later We had been reading some detective story or other; I thinkI can only say I think because one's ree the date and so placeI think it was The Mystery of the Yellow Room, The Mystery of the Yellow Room, which had just come out, by a new author, Gaston Le Roux, with an attractive young reporter as detectivehis na mystery, orked out and planned, of the type some call unfair and others have to admit is almost unfair, but not quite: one which had just come out, by a new author, Gaston Le Roux, with an attractive young reporter as detectivehis na mystery, orked out and planned, of the type some call unfair and others have to admit is almost unfair, but not quite: one could could just have seen a neat little clue cleverly slipped in just have seen a neat little clue cleverly slipped in

We talked about it a lot, told each other our views, and agreed it was one of the best We were connoisseurs of the detective story: Madge had initiatedto Sherlock Hol with The Levenworth Case, The Levenworth Case, which had fascinated ht Then there was arsene Lupinbut I never quite considered that a proper detective story, though the stories were exciting and great fun There were also the Paul Beck stories, highly approved, which had fascinated ht Then there was arsene Lupinbut I never quite considered that a proper detective story, though the stories were exciting and great fun There were also the Paul Beck stories, highly approved, The Chronicles of Mark Hewitt The Chronicles of Mark Hewittand now The Mystery of the Yellow Room The Mystery of the Yellow Room Fired with all this, I said I should like to try Fired with all this, I said I should like to try my my hand at a detective story hand at a detective story

'I don't think you could do it,' said Madge 'They are very difficult to do I've thought about it'

'I should like to try'

'Well, I bet you couldn't,' said Madge

There the matter rested It was never a definite bet; we never set out the termsbut the words had been said From that moment I was fired by the detero further than that I didn't start to write it then, or plan it out; the seed had been sown At the back ofto write take their place long before the germination of the seed occurs, the idea had been planted: some day I would write a detective story soie and I wrote to each other regularly I gave him the local news, and tried to write hi has never been one of e, nohat I can only describe as a model of the art! She couldat all I do envy that gift

My dear Reggie's letters were exactly like Reggie talking, which was nice and reassuring He urged o about a lot

'Now don't stay at hoie Don't think that is what I want, because it isn't; you s and parties I do want you to have every chance, before we get settled down'

Looking back noonder whether at the back of htly resented this point of view I don't think I recognised it at the tio about, to see other people, 'to do better for yourself' (that extraordinary phrase)? Is it not nearer to the truth that every female would prefer her love-letters to exhibit a show of jealousy? like to be urged to go about, to see other people, 'to do better for yourself' (that extraordinary phrase)? Is it not nearer to the truth that every female would prefer her love-letters to exhibit a show of jealousy?

'Who is that fellow so-and-so you write about? You're not getting too fond of him, are you?'

Isn't that e really want as a sex? Can we take too much unselfishness? Or does one read back into one's s that perhaps weren't there?

The usual dances were given in the neighbourhood I didn't go to them because, as we had no car, it would not have been practicable to accept any invitations ofa cab or car would have been too expensive except for a very special occasion But there were tiirls was on, and then you would be asked to stay, or fetched and returned

The Cliffords at Chudleigh were giving a dance to which they were asking members of the Garrison from Exeter, and they asked soirl or two along My old ene with his wife in Chudleigh, suggested that they should bring raduated fro up and asked if I would coo to the Cliffords' dance I was delighted to do so, of course