Part 1 (1/2)
Talks on Talking.
by Grenville Kleiser.
PREFACE
Good conversation implies naturalness, spontaneity, and sincerity of utterance. It is not advisable, therefore, to lay down arbitrary rules to govern talking, but it is believed that the suggestions offered here will contribute to the general elevation and improvement of daily speech.
Considering the large number of persons who are obliged to talk in social, business, and public life, the subject of correct speech should receive more serious consideration than is usually given to it. It is earnestly hoped that this volume will be of practical value to those who are desirous of developing and improving their conversational powers.
Appreciative thanks are expressed to the Editors of the _Homiletic Review_ for permission to reprint some of the extracts.
GRENVILLE KLEISER.
NEW YORK CITY, MAY, 1916.
Boys flying kites haul in their white-wing'd birds: You can't do that way when you're flying words.
”Careful with fire,” is good advice we know; ”Careful with words,” is ten times doubly so.
Thoughts unexpress'd may sometimes fall back dead, But G.o.d Himself can't kill them once they're said!
--_Will Carleton._
The first duty of a man is to speak; that is his chief business in this world; and talk, which is the harmonious speech of two or more, is by far the most accessible of pleasures. It costs nothing; it is all profit; it completes our education; it founds and fosters our friends.h.i.+ps; and it is by talk alone that we learn our period and ourselves.
--_Robert Louis Stevenson._
Vociferated logic kills me quite; A noisy man is always in the right-- I twirl my thumbs, fall back into my chair, Fix on the wainscot a distressful stare; And when I hope his blunders all are out, Reply discreetly, ”To be sure--no doubt!”
--_Anon._
TALKS ON TALKING
THE ART OF TALKING
The charm of conversation chiefly depends upon the adaptability of the partic.i.p.ants. It is a great accomplishment to be able to enter gently and agreeably into the moods of others, and to give way to them with grace and readiness.
The spirit of conversation is oftentimes more important than the ideas expressed. What we are rather than what we say has the most permanent influence upon those around us. Hence it is that where a group of persons are met together in conversation, it is the inner life of each which silently though none the less surely imparts tone and character to the occasion.
It requires vigorous self-discipline so to cultivate the feelings of kindness and sympathy that they are always in readiness for use. These qualities are essential to agreeable and profitable intercourse, though comparatively few people possess them.
Burke considered manners of more importance than laws. Sidney Smith described manners as the shadows of virtues. Dean Swift defined manners as the art of putting at ease the people with whom we converse.
Chesterfield said manners should adorn knowledge in order to smooth its way through the world. Emerson spoke of manners as composed of petty sacrifices.
We all recognize that a winning manner is made up of seemingly insignificant courtesies, and of constant little attentions. A person of charming manner is usually free from resentments, inquisitiveness, and moods.