Part 17 (1/2)
MAXIM FOR CYCLISTS.--”_Try_-cycle before you _Buy_-cycle.”
Ill.u.s.tration: Motorist (a novice) has been giving chairman of local urban council a practical demonstration of the ease with which a motor-car can be controlled when travelling at a high speed.
Ill.u.s.tration: LOVE'S ENDURANCE
_Miss Dolly_ (_to her fiance_). ”Oh, Jack, this _is_ delightful! If you'll only keep up the pace, I'm sure I shall soon gain confidence!”
[_Poor Jack has already run a mile or more, and is very short of condition._
Ill.u.s.tration: TU QUOQUE.--_Cyclist_ (_a beginner who has just collided with freshly-painted fence_). ”Confound your filthy paint! Now, just look at my coat!” _Painter._ ”'Ang yer bloomin' coat! _'Ow about my paint?_”
Ill.u.s.tration: NOTE TO THE SUPERSt.i.tIOUS
It is considered lucky for a black cat to cross your path.
Ill.u.s.tration: WAITING FOR
_A Study of Rural_
”W'y, I remembers the time w'en I'd 'ave stopped _that_ for furious drivin', an' I reckon it's only goin' about a paltry fifteen mile an hour!”
Ill.u.s.tration: BIGGER GAME
_Police Methods_
”_Ar!_ Now them cyclists is puttin' on a fairish pace!
Summat about twenty mile an hour, I s'pose. But 'tain't no business o'
mine. _I'm_ 'ere to stop _motor-caws_. Wot ho!”
LOVE IN A CAR
[”I have personal knowledge of marriages resulting from motor-car courts.h.i.+ps.”--The HON. C. S. ROLLS.--_Daily Express._]
When Reginald asked me to drive in his car I knew what it meant for us both, For peril to love-making offers no bar, But fosters the plighting of troth.
To the tender occasion I hastened to rise, So bought a new frock on the strength of it, Some china-blue chiffon--to go with my eyes-- And wrapped up my head with a length of it.
”Get in,” said my lover, ”as quick as you can!”
He wore a black smear on his face, And held out the hand of a rough artisan To pilot me into my place.
Like the engine my frock somehow seemed to mis-fire, For Reginald's manner was querulous, But after some fuss with the near hind-wheel tyre We were off at a pace that was perilous.
”There's Brown just behind, on his second-hand brute, He thinks it can move, silly a.s.s!”