Part 14 (1/2)

Ill.u.s.tration: GENTLE SATIRE--”I say, Bill, look 'ere! 'Ere's a old cove out record-breaking!”

Ill.u.s.tration: MOTOR MANIA.--

_The Poet_ (_deprecatingly_). ”They say she gives more attention to her motor-cars than to her children.”

_The b.u.t.terfly._ ”Of course. How absurd you are! Motor-cars require more attention than children.”

Ill.u.s.tration: SOUR GRAPES

_First Scorcher._ ”Call _that_ exercise?”

_Second Scorcher._ ”No. _I_ call it sitting in a draught!”

Ill.u.s.tration: NOT TO BE CAUGHT.--

_Motorist_ (_whose motor has thrown elderly villager into horse-pond_).

”Come along, my man, I'll take you home to get dry.”

_Elderly Villager._ ”No, yer don't. I've got yer number, and 'ere I stays till a hindependent witness comes along!”

Ill.u.s.tration: _Pedestrian._ ”I hear Brown has taken to cycling, and is very enthusiastic about it!”

_Cyclist._ ”Enthusiastic! Not a bit of it. Why, he never rides before breakfast!”

Ill.u.s.tration: GROTESQUERIES

_Words wanted to express feelings_

When your motor refuses to move, twenty miles from the nearest town.

Ill.u.s.tration: SO INCONSIDERATE

”Jove! Might have killed us! I must have a wire screen fixed up.”

BROWNING ON THE ROAD.

Round the bend of a sudden came Z 1 3, And I shot into his front wheel's rim; And straight was a fine of gold for him, And the need of a brand-new bike for me.

Ill.u.s.tration: ”IF DOUGHTY DEEDS MY LADY PLEASE”