Part 9 (1/2)

His brown gaze went from me to Giovanni. ”I know what you're thinking, Gwyneth. I know you care for me. You cannot tell me this little friends.h.i.+p you have with him is worth jeopardizing what we have.”

Giovanni let go of my arms and turned away from me. He walked away and I rounded on Pallo. ”Don't ever read me again and use it to hurt him, ever! Are you so jealous that he and I are friends that you have to stoop to these parlor tricks? G.o.d, you're a real piece of work, Pallo.”

”He's a monster, Gwyneth. If he stays, he will lure you into bed with him and then he will have you right back where he wants you. Have you learned nothing from your history? He cannot be trusted. He will hurt you and all those you love. I know this for a fact. Let him go before you do something you'll regret.”

My blood boiled. Giovanni turned towards Pallo. I didn't think it was possible to look even more p.i.s.sed than me, but he was doing a fine job.

”Pallo, he's changed. Stop throwing the past in my face. I can make my own d.a.m.n decisions without you and you're wrong.”

Pallo took a step towards me. James appeared close to me. I watched Pallo's eyes darken. He was losing his cool and fast. ”Why don't you let him f.u.c.k you? Then you will see how wonderful he really is when he turns on you... again.”

”You're right about one thing, Giovanni is wonderful, but he didn't f.u.c.k me.”

Pallo let out a small snort. I glanced at Giovanni. He looked so hurt and so confused that I couldn't help but go towards him.

Pallo snorted. ”f.u.c.k him, Gwen, and you will see his true colors. Once he thinks he has you he will show you what he is made of and you will come running back to me to clean up the mess again!”

I kept my gaze on Giovanni, but spoke to Pallo. ”When I said he didn't f.u.c.k me, I wasn't implying we haven't had s.e.x. I was just stating a fact. He didn't f.u.c.k me Pallo.

He made love to me. There's a huge difference, not that you'd know.”

Giovanni's eyes widened and a look of relief washed over his face. His gaze flickered to something behind me and he opened his mouth to yell. ”Bella!”

Pallo yanked me around and held me up at least a foot off the ground. He was so mad his face was s.h.i.+fted into his demon form. I closed my eyes and tried to swallow down my fear. It didn't work.

”You let that monster inside you? You gave yourself over to him after what he did to you, to me, and to our child? How could you?”

”Pallo,” James said sounding very worried.

Giovanni appeared next to us and he didn't look pleased at how Pallo was treating me. I put my hand up. ”It's okay.”

Giovanni shook his head. ”No, Bella, it is not okay. He wants to harm you. He is fighting the urge to snap your neck. I believe that for the moment you are safe, but ....”

I froze. Giovanni sired Pallo so he could read him like Pallo could read me. I knew what Giovanni was saying was what Pallo was thinking, but I still couldn't bring myself to believe Pallo was capable of hurting me. Now that I had been presented with the facts I realized that Pallo was no different from the monster he made Giovanni out to be.

Pallo dropped me quickly and backed away, appearing confused. ”Gwyneth.” He turned and walked towards the barns. James went after him.

Giovanni put his hand out to me. ”Do you understand what you just did?”

Unfortunately, I understood all too well what I'd just done. ”Yes, I picked you.”

Chapter Fifteen.

My first night home was shaping up to be weird-rather thirteen o'clockish. You know, that spot on the clock you think should be there but isn't. There was no other way to describe it. The place no longer felt like my home, yet it was. Pallo had obviously taken time to pick things he knew I'd like. The master bedroom was the only room I think he'd done more for himself than me. It was identical to the bedroom we'd shared over two- hundred years ago. The walls were a pale yellow, the trim all done white and the bed was a large wooden four-poster bed.

Getting used to the remodeled farmhouse was one thing. Ironing out sleeping arrangements was another. It turned out Pallo had living quarters constructed over each new barn. James told me that he and Caradoc had set Mikhail's group up in two of them. Pallo had taken another and James had been sent in to sleep in the room next to mine. I had little doubt that he was told to listen in on everything Giovanni and I did.

I looked over at Giovanni. He was laying his s.h.i.+rt across the footboard. He moved around and sat down on the edge of the bed to take his shoes off. He'd been pretty quiet since our little spat with Pallo outside. I had no intention of s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up his reflection time so I tossed my jeans and sweater aside. I walked over to my, now large, wood dresser and searched around for my favorite oversized t-s.h.i.+rt. It was gone. All I could find were outfits that would make underwear models blush. I rolled my eyes and decided I'd just sleep in the t-s.h.i.+rt I had on. It came to just above my navel and was snug, but it was a h.e.l.l of a lot more comfy than the stuff Pallo had loaded me up with.

I reached up and unfastened my bra. Years of changing in the girls' locker rooms and being the only one with b.r.e.a.s.t.s will make you an expert at removing a bra from under a s.h.i.+rt. I walked over and climbed in bed. Giovanni was still sitting at the foot of the bed. His shoes were off, but he hadn't moved.

He let out a sigh. ”Gwyneth, you know if I lie here with you tonight, Pallo will be lost to you forever?”

I didn't answer right away. It wasn't one of those questions you can just give an automated response. He was right. Being in the same room for the night while Pallo slept in the same vicinity would mean the end of any chance I had with Pallo. But really, what chance had I ever had with him? He'd perfected the art of pus.h.i.+ng me away and distancing himself from me. He seemed convinced I could never love the monster he'd become. I not only had been more than willing to love it, I ended up sleeping with the one who had made him that way. I was completely screwed in the head and I knew it. That had to count for something. First step to recovery, right?

”Is what he says true? Will you hurt everyone I love?”

Giovanni turned and looked at me. ”I already have.”

”Tell me more about it.” I opened the covers up for him. He stood, unzipped his gray slacks and pulled them off. Seeing him standing before me in his dark gray bikini briefs brought a smile to my face. He climbed in and moved his body close to mine.

It took us only seconds to find a comfortable way to lie facing each other. It was plain to see we'd had nearly a hundred years of practice. I ran my foot over his leg and snuggled closer to him. I was suddenly cold and the idea of being in his arms warmed me. I know it was silly, but hey, that's what I'm all about.

”Spending the night with me here will end any chance of a future with Pallo. I told you I am more than willing to share you with him, but he will not do the same in return.”

”I wish I could say that I'm ready to toss everything I could have with Pallo out the window. I don't want to be that girl who can't make up her mind forever. But I need to know more about you. Are you willing to share that with me?”

He kissed my forehead. ”What if I told you there was a way for me to show you.”

I grabbed him tightly and waited for him to go on. He did. ”I know you have the gift of visions. You've always had that. When I saw you at the nightclub with Pallo at first I could not believe it was you, then once I knew it was really you, I pulled my power around me to keep you from reading me. I've been doing it every moment I've been near you. If I let it down you will be able to follow along and see our past together with your own eyes. But,” he grew quiet, ”there is a chance your mind will not be able to understand it is just a dream, a memory of a life long ago. You may feel every emotion and your body may react like the events are truly taking place.” He stroked my cheek. ”This is not something I recommend, but it is only a matter of time before Pallo realizes I am s.h.i.+elding myself from you and he will twist it to look as though I'm trying to deceive you.”

I pulled the blanket up and over us more. I was still shaking, now out of a mix of fear and excitement. ”Why do you sound so against it?”

”Gwyneth, suppose I let you in and you can't pull back. It is a well-known fact you died. Do you think I want that to happen again? Do you think I want to know that two times I could have prevented it and I didn't?”

”No, but ....”

He pulled my chin up to him. ”But, you want to know all the answers to a life you can't remember. You may not like the answers you get and you may not like me when you are done.”

”If you're so sure I'm going to hate you, why do it?”

He gave me another quick kiss. ”If I do not then you will forever wonder if Pallo was right about you not being able to trust me anymore.”

”Will I remember everything?”

”I believe if your powers are still the same, you will receive bits and pieces and perhaps that will jar your memory.”

”How do we do it?”

”We bring in someone you trust first. Then I will open up to you.”

I looked at him as my face drew into a scowl. ”Why do we need someone else in here?”

”What if I do this and you cannot get back. I'm not strong enough to sustain you through my essence along with pulling you back from the edge.”

I ran my fingers over the faint scars on his chest. Did I really want to know everything about my past? I was happy with Giovanni in the here and now, but he was right. I'd always wonder if he was being honest with me. Pallo had made me doubt him and I would always question his honesty.