Part 10 (1/2)
Mei Yin tucked the blanket firmly around Ming Kong's knee, released the brake of the wheel chair, and pushed it towards the newly extended arrival hall in Terminal 3 at Heathrow. Throngs of people were heading purposefully in the same direction. She wheeled the chair suddenly to the left to avoid three young children running helter scatter after their parents.
”You shouldn't have come. She would not expect it. It is too soon after your heart attack. Really, Ming Kong, you should take it easy.”
”I'm fine. Don't fuss. I am not dead yet. I owe her that much. All these weeks in the hospital and at home, have given me time to think and mull over the hurtful things I have said to her. Nelly and I had a long conversation on the phone. Well, you were part of it, so you know. She made me realise the folly of my action. Perhaps, if I had listened and not just set the rules and expected them to be followed, all this would not have happened.”
He fell silent brooding over the role he might have inadvertently played in An Mei's headlong rush to marry Hussein. Mei Yin sensed her husband's sadness.
”Don't blame yourself. I am sure it was not Nelly's intention that you should blame yourself. I think An Mei would have married Hussein whatever we might or might not have done. It is a new age. Our children, and I am not speaking only of An Mei, but also the boys, cannot be handled the way children were handled in the past.” Mei Yin spoke quietly; uncertain as to how Ming Kong would respond. Despite her newfound confidence and Ming Kong's mellower manner, she still half-expect him to burst into a temper. He disliked being proved wrong.
Ming Kong reached up and patted her hand. ”You are right.” She did not see his smile. ”I'm excited. I have so much to say to my daughter, but I fear I will not be able to say them.”
”Me too,” agreed Mei Yin. They arrived at the terminal and headed for the flight arrivals screen. She watched the screen change.
”Her flight has landed. We'll wait over there, the same spot where she met us,” said Mei Yin, excitedly. She pushed the chair to the meeting point and stood, one hand steadying the chair, the other firmly on her husband's shoulder. She knew how much it had cost him to eat humble pie. She looked around her; noted the casual manner in which people hugged one another; the kisses exchanged; the cries of endearment, ”darling”, ”love”, ”sweet-heart”. She knew that Ming Kong was not comfortable with such shows of affection, but Nelly had told her not to hold back. ”If you do, it will make An Mei feel you do not love her,” she had said. ”Hug her. She needs you.”
She could hardly hear the arrival announcement for the noise in the hall. She saw An Mei, her head shrouded in a hijab, looking in search of them. She looked different, older and thinner. Her eyes were wary. Ming Kong made a movement; he was attempting to rise from the wheel chair.
”No!” Mei Yin said. ”Wait! She has seen us. She'll be here any moment now.”
An Mei was half running towards them now, her shawl flying behind her, her hair loosened; her long skirt made her stumble. She checked herself, hitched up her skirt and continued towards them, pulling her suitcase behind her. The case wobbled, spun left and right and then righted itself. Still she ran.
”Mama! Papa!” she cried coming to a stop in front of them. She was breathless, her chest heaving, her eyes questioning. A moment's hesitation and she was in Mei Yin's arms. No words were exchanged; no words were needed. An Mei dropped to her knees and embraced her father, shocked at his appearance, surprised that he had come. Mei Yin looked on, her eyes bright. Nelly had been right. A deed was better than words in expressing how they felt.
Ming Kong got up from his bed and made his way to the window. He drew the curtain aside to look out. It was dark and the street deserted. The street lamps cast an eerie glow, lending a mystical air to the houses alongside them. Shadows formed and broke. A cat meowed; a dog barked. Then stillness.
”Can't you sleep?” asked Mei Yin, pus.h.i.+ng herself up to a sitting position.
”No! I did not mean to disturb you. I thought I was keeping very quiet.”
”You were. I couldn't sleep either. I keep thinking of An Mei.”
”Ahhh... me too! I am so full of anger,” he said, rubbing his chest as though to ease the pain. ”I am frustrated by the inability to do anything to help. Did I drive her to marry Hussein?” he asked Mei Yin. ”I had no idea that she was so much in love with him. I had no inkling. In my eyes, she was my little girl. I just could not adjust to the fact that she is a grown woman. I could not accept that she could really be in love with someone. I was so angry and so wrapped up in my own grievances; my mind just would not accept her loving a Malay.”
”I know,” she said, ”but it's no use blaming yourself.”
”Why? Why him, of all people?”
”You might as well say why you and me?” Mei Yin replied.
”I hate what they did to my girl. I can't bear to think of how she has been treated.” He looked at Mei Yin; his eyes full of pain.
”Shhh! You will wake her.”
”We have not even seen Hussein. What kind of man is he?” Ming Kong continued. He was furious although he knew he was not in a position to pa.s.s judgement on Hussein considering his own infidelity in the past. It was not something he wished for his own daughter. ”Should we return to KL, meet him and his parents?”
Mei Yin thought for a while. ”Jenny knows them. I am not sure if our going would help. It might make things worse.” She thought of her husband's temper and what Jenny had told her about Hussein's parents.
She got out of bed and went to him. She laid her head on his shoulder. ”An Mei is happier and calmer, just knowing that she has our support, that you are not cross with her.” Holding his head to her, she kissed his cheeks and then his eyes. His tears were salty on her lips.
Mother and daughter weaved their way along the uneven path alongside the river. The gra.s.s at the side of it was almost knee high. It was the height of summer. Plumes of gra.s.s seeds swayed; bees droned as they dived from flower to flower in search of nectar.
”I love this part of the river Thames. Casey and I used to row along here,” said An Mei.
She was looking more like her former self, observed Mei Yin. There were some colour in her cheeks and she was wearing trousers and a tee s.h.i.+rt.
”There! Over by that turn in the river, where the ducks and swans are, that was where our boat capsized. We were lucky it is quite shallow. I had no idea how to row and Casey kept saying in Mandarin, jia you, jia you. At that time, I didn't know what 'add oil' meant. I did not realise that she wanted me to speed up. So I desperately flung my oar towards the bank to stop the boat and over we went.”
An Mei laughed. Mei Yin could see that her mind was delving into her happy student days. It was such a contrast from her present situation. Her heart ached for her daughter.
”So how did you get on with your father?” Mei Yin asked her.
”Good,” An Mei replied. ”He was very supportive and understanding, but I have to make my mind up myself. Aunt Nelly said as much. But knowing that I have made amends with both father and you helps me. I am not so bound by guilt as before. Now I can focus on the problem.”
They stopped and sat down on the bank. Mei Yin noticed the abrupt change in her daughter's demeanour. She looked downcast, the energy and joy that were there only moments ago had vanished.
”I have to return to KL tomorrow. I am frightened.”
”You are a strong girl; a bright girl. You will make the right decision,” comforted Mei Yin. She saw the doubt in her daughter's face. She wondered what she would have done in her place; if she were young, like her, again. She recalled her own rashness, her own foolhardiness and the mistakes she had made.
”Remember, you are young. What might seem so impa.s.sable and impossible can easily change. If you make a wrong decision, it can be undone. Don't look back. Look forward.”
An Mei plucked at the gra.s.s. She ran her fingers through the feathery flower heads. She plucked a dandelion seed head looking like a ball of cotton. She blew softly on it sending a cloud of little fluffs drifting into the air around them.
”I think Hussein will have taken Shalimar as his second wife by now. Ahmad was in such a hurry to seal things and my mother-in-law, well, she would be pleased. I did not want to know the details. I decided to run. I flew here because I did not want to partic.i.p.ate in their wedding ceremony. It makes a mockery of my marriage. What I have to decide now is whether I still want to be his wife.”
She plucked more dandelion heads, tearing them from the bank; she blew and blew as though her life depended on it. Tears splattered down, staining her tee s.h.i.+rt.
”I still do not know if Hussein was an unknowing, unwilling partic.i.p.ant when he...” She could not complete her sentence. ”At times I believe in him. I told Aunt Nelly I believe him. Now I am not sure. I have been thinking night after night. Can I believe him, when all evidence suggests otherwise?”
She shrugged her shoulder. ”See I vacillate. I told Aunt Nelly I believe in him and now I have doubts again. Sorry! I keep repeating myself.”
”If you do not believe in him, it would be a very bad basis for a marriage. You are young. You can end it.” She saw her daughter's reluctance. ”Is there anyone that can help you find out the truth? Would knowing for sure help you decide?”
Mei Yin sighed, frustrated by her inability to help her daughter. ”What about Shalimar herself? You said that she had originally been unwilling to marry Hussein. What about Fawziah, the maid who helped you before? Servants have ears. They know a lot.”
Chapter 22.
Hussein walked into the bridal bedroom. The servants closed the door behind him and hurried away. They whispered amongst themselves and remarked on the mournful expression of the bride.
”Face like a bitter gourd! Alamak! Like quinine,” they remarked of Shalimar.