Part 53 (2/2)

Rugg! Is she on the floor?”

YES, SOMETIMES WE THROW THE WHOLE MAIL AWAY WITHOUT LOOKING AT IT.

[From the Madison State Journal.]

It isn't ”B. L. T.” and ”F. P. A.” that makes the respective columns of these most celebrated of the ”conductors” great. It is their daily mail.

It comes to them in great bags. They open enough letters to fill that day's column, and consign thousands, unopened, to the waste basket.

There is a fortune to some newspaper syndicate in the unopened mail of ”B.L.T.” and ”F.P.A.”

A limousine delegate from the Federated Order of Line Scribes has waited on us to present the demands of the organization, among which are (1) recognition of the union; (2) appointing a time and place for meeting with a business committee to determine on a system of collective bargaining for Line material; (3) allowing the Order to have a voice in the management of the column. A prompt compliance with the demands of the Order failing, a strike vote will be ordered.

We have never limited the output of a contributor; the union will. No matter how excellent the idea, no matter how inspired the contrib may be to amplify it, he will not be permitted to do more than a certain amount of work per day. However brilliant he may be, he will be held down to the level of the most pedestrian performer. In unionizing, moreover, he will be only exchanging one tyrant for another, and perhaps not so benevolent a one. Now, then, go to it, as the emperor said to the gladiators.

ALL RIGHT, DAISY.

Dear B. L. T., pray take this hint: I shrink to see my name in print, The agate line--O please!--for me.

I sign myself just--

Daisy B.

THE SHY AND LOWLYS.

I'm modest and meek, And not a bit pus.h.i.+ng.

Please set in Antique, Or 14 point Cus.h.i.+ng.

Iris.

HE MIGHT TRIM THE VIOLETS.

Sir: Could you find an inconspicuous job around the Academy for a bashful man like Mr. Jess Mee, whom we had the pleasure of encountering in Toulon, Ill.?

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