Part 23 (2/2)
”You hate her, Meg,” he said. ”Just in the way I'd hate a man who . . .” he paused.
”Who what?” Meg said.
”Don't ask me,” he said. ”I never forgot you for one moment when I was with her at the Pyramids. You kept close to me, dearest. And the other episode is past and forgotten--it was just a little bit of vulgarity, Meg, nothing more.”
”Since we made friends, there's been nothing between you that would make your kisses to me a mere vulgarity, Mike?”
”Nothing,” he said. ”And so far as I can help it, I will never see Mrs. Mervill again.”
Meg's eyes spoke her thanks. His avoidance of the woman's Christian name showed his sensitiveness to her feelings. Speaking of her as ”Mrs. Mervill” put her pleasantly far away.
”I was weak and insincere--my kisses were really a dishonour to any woman, and I hated myself.”
While Meg admired her lover for refraining from the excuse which Adam was not ashamed to offer His Maker, what was human in her longed to make him denounce the woman she hated. She had tried to provoke a justification of his own conduct from his lips by telling her what she felt to be the truth--that the woman had tempted him.
It was getting late; they turned towards the hut.
”We must go in,” Meg said. ”Freddy will be wondering what has become of us.” She turned swiftly and took Michael's hands in hers. ”Until after the tomb is opened, let us remain as we were--I mean, don't let's give Freddy any more to think about. Isn't he the dearest brother in the world?” she said. ”I love every glittering hair of his head!”
”Very well, you dearest woman,” Mike said. ”Besides, we've only confessed that we love each other--I've asked for no promise, Meg--I've no right to. Remember, you are free, absolutely free--this old drifter isn't to count.”
”Absolutely free!” Meg laughed. ”Just as if words made us free! Four walls do not a prison make! You know perfectly well that I am tied hand and foot and bound all round about with the cords of your love. I can never be free again, never belong only to myself, as I used to do.”
”And will you remember that whatever happens to me, Meg, it will be just the same?”
She knew that he was referring to his mystical journey, his unsettled future.
”It would be so heavenly,” she said dreamily, ”if we could be content to sit down and be happy and just live for the enjoyment of each other's love!”
”You'd despise me if I did.” He looked round at the eternal valley, resting in the stillness of death.
”I suppose I should,” Meg said. ”I suppose I want you to take up arms for what Freddy calls your 'Utopian Rule of Righteousness,' your world-state.”
”I think we should both feel slackers, just enjoying ourselves intellectually, dear, when we could, if we chose, let a few others into the great kingdom of G.o.d. You and I don't understand why they don't all see it as we do, why they don't realize the things Akhnaton knew three thousand years ago. We wonder why they remain contented with a religion of limited dogmas and theological forms. They don't see the obvious in their striving after doctrines. They fail to see that G.o.d is too big for their churches.”
”You see these things,” Meg said. ”I'm only creeping behind you.”
”You see that if we understand G.o.d and give Him His proper place, He'd rule us, His throne would govern a world-state. His love would be the law of mankind.”
”I know,” Margaret said. ”It's beautiful, it's what ought to be, if poor mortals were not human beings.”
”Mortals are the best things in G.o.d's kingdom--it's all been worked up for their enjoyment and benefit.”
”I know, dear, I know, but you and I are just you and I, and we have just found love, and it is so wonderful, I want to enjoy it.”
”Doesn't love make it all the more forcible, Meg? The closeness of G.o.d all the more certain? The weaving of the threads of His beautiful fabric all the more golden?--Akhnaton's great 'Lord of Fortune,' the 'Master of Things Ordained,' the 'Chance which gives Life,' the 'Origin of Fate,' call it what you will--the power which brought us here, you and I.”
”And if we didn't follow that clear voice, Mike, whose rule is righteousness, why should He allow it?”
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