Volume III Part 29 (2/2)
”But should I be much better off then? And how about my mother?”
”Your mother? Oh! I will make her listen to reason”
”You know not what she is like The honour of the faet me out of the way, but before that she would make me suffer torments to which death is preferable by far But why have you said no more about the aroph? Is it not all a jest? It would be a very cruel one”
”On the contrary, I believe it to be infallible, though I have never been a witness of its effects; but what good is it forhas made me keep silence
Confide in your lover, who is at Venice; write hiiven into his hands, in five or six days, by a sure ive you whatever money may be needed for hiiving you the aroph”
”This idea is a good one and the offer generous on your part, but it is not feasible, as you would see if you knew more about my circumstances
Do not think anyI made up my mind to receive the aroph from another, tell me how it could be done Even if my lover were in Paris, how could he spend an entire ith ive me the dose five or six times a day for a week? You see yourself that this reive yourself to another, if you thought that would save your honour?”
”Certainly, if I were sure that the thing would be kept secret But where shall I find such a person? Do you think he would be easy to find, or that I can go and look for him?”
I did not knohat to make of this speech; for she knew I loved her, and I did not see why she should put herself to the trouble of going far hat she wanted was to her hand I was inclined to think that she wanted me to ask her to make choice of myself as the administrator of the remedy, either to spare herto ht be wrong, and I did not care to expose myself to the humiliation of a refusal On the other hand I could hardly think she wanted to insultto draw an explanation frohed profoundly, took up irl, my lot is more wretched than yours”
She raised herself in the bed and begged me with tears in her eyes to remain, and asked me how I could callto be annoyed and yet full of love for her, I told her that the contempt in which she held me had affected me deeply, since in her necessity she preferred the offices of one as unknown to her rather than make use of”I see, for er since you wish to take advantage of ain a triue not worthy of a ”
Her tears softened me, and I fell on my knees before her
”Since you know, dearest, that I worshi+p you, how can you thinkmyself on you? Do you think that I can bear to hear you say that since your lover cannot help you you do not knohere to look for help?”
”But after refusing you my favours, could I ask this office of you with any decency? Have I not good reason to be afraid that as I refused to take pity on your love so you would refuse to take pity on my necessity?”
”Do you think that a passionate lover ceases to love on account of a refusal which may be dictated by virtue? Let ht you did not love me, but now I am sure of the contrary; and that your heart would have led you to satisfy my love, even if you had not been thus situated Iany doubts of your love”
”You have interpreted ether with the necessary freedom from observation remains to be seen”
”Do not be afraid Now I a before I contrive soo and make the aroph”
I had resolved that if ever I succeeded in persuading Mdlle X C V
tobut honey, so the composition of the aroph would not be a very complicated process But if one point was then plain and siave hts in continual toils I feared I had promised more than I could perform, and I should not be able to , not the success of the aroph, but the bliss I had taken such pains to win Again, as her younger sister slept in the same room with her and close to her, the operation could not be performed there At last chance--a divinity which often helps lovers--caed to climb up to the fourth floor and , and begged o any farther as the place was taken
”But,” said I, ”you have just come out of it”