Volume II Part 35 (2/2)
The next day, after dinner, M Ch C---- called upon M de Bragadin, but I did not shew myself He remained a couple of hours with one I heard that his answer had been what the mother had told me, but with the addition of a circuhter would pass the four years which were to elapse, before she could think of e, in a convent
As a palliative to his refusal he had added, that, if by that tiht consent to our wedding
That answer struck me as most cruel, and in the despair in which it threw ht I found the door by which I used to gain admittance to C---- C---- closed and locked inside
I returned home more dead than alive, and lost twenty-four hours in that fearful perplexity in which a man is often throhen he feels hi what to decide I thought of carrying her off, but a thousand difficulties combined to prevent the execution of that scheme, and her brother was in prison I sa difficult it would be to contrive a correspondence with my wife, for I considered C---- C---- as such, e had received the sanction of the priest's blessing or of the notary's legal contract
Tortured by a thousand distressing ideas, I made up my mind at last to pay a visit to Madame C---- A servant opened the door, and inforone to the country; she could not tell me when she was expected to return to Venice This neas a terrible thunder-bolt to me; I remained as motionless as a statue; for now that I had lost that last resource I had no htest information
I tried to look calm in the presence of my three friends, but in reality I was in a state truly worthy of pity, and the reader will perhaps realize it if I tell him that in my despair I made up my mind to call on P---- C---- in his prison, in the hope that he ive me so, and I did not enlighten his ignorance He told ospel, and giving hi hi my brain to contrive some way to know the position of my mistress--for I felt certain it was a fearful one--and believing her to be unhappy I reproached myself most bitterly as the cause of her misery
I had reached such a state of anxiety that I could neither eat nor sleep
Two days after the refusal of the father, M de Bragadin and his two friends went to Padua for a o with them, and I was alone in the house I needed consolation and I went to the gareat deal
I had already sold whatever I possessed of any value, and I owed money everywhere I could expect no assistance except frommy position to them I was in that disposition which leads easily to self-destruction, and I was thinking of it as I was shaving ht to my room a woman who had a letter forme the letter, she said,
”Are you the person to whonized at once a seal which I had given to C---- C----; I thought I would drop down dead In order to recover my composure, I told the woman to wait, and tried to shave myself, but my hand refused to perform its office I put the razor down, turnedthe letter I read the following lines,
”Before I can write all I have to say, Iin a convent, and am very well treated, and I enjoy excellent health in spite of the anxiety of my mind The superior has been instructed to forbid me all visitors and correspondence I a able to write to you, notwithstanding these very strict orders I entertain no doubt of your good faith, my beloved husband, and I feel sure that you will never doubt a heart which is wholly yours Trust to me for the execution of whatever you may wish me to do, for I am yours and only yours Answer only a feords until we are quite certain of our er
”Muran, June 12th”
In less than three weeksfriend had become a clever moralist; it is true that Love had been her teacher, and Love alone can workof her letter, I was in the state of a criminal pardoned at the foot of the scaffold I required several minutes before I recovered the exercise of my will and er, and asked her if she could read
”Ah, sir! if I could not read, it would be a great misfortune for me
There are seven women appointed for the service of the nuns of Muran
One of us comes in turn to Venice once a week; I co you an answer to the letter which, if you like, you can write now”
”Then you can take charge of the letters entrusted to you by the nuns?”
”That is not supposed to be one of our duties but the faithful delivery of letters being the most important of the commissions committed to our care, we should not be trusted if we could not read the address of the letters placed in our hands The nuns wanted to be sure that we shall not give to Peter the letter addressed to Paul The good uilty of such blunders Therefore I shall be here again, without fail, this day week at the same hour, but please to order your servant to wake you in case you should be asleep, for our tiold Above all, rely entirely uponas you eue in my head I should lose my bread, and then ould becoht years old, and three pretty girls, the eldest of whom is only sixteen? You can see thearden side, and I aed in the service of the nuns, who are always sendinglady--I do not know her naave me this letter, but so cleverly! Oh! she must be as witty as she is pretty, for three nuns ere there were coave it to me with this other letter for myself, which I likewise leave in your hands Poor child! she tells me to be discreet! She need not be afraid Write to her, I entreat you, sir, that she can trust me, and answer boldly I would not tell you to act in the saers of the convent, although I believe them to be honest--and God forbid I should speak ill of norant, you see; and it is certain that they babble, at least, with their confessors, if with nobody else As for me, thank God! I know very well that I need not confess anything but my sins, and surely to carry a letter from a Christian woman to her brother in Christ is not a sin Besides, ood old monk, quite deaf, I believe, for the worthy man never answers me; but that is his business, not mine!”
I had not intended to ask her any questions, but if such had been ivenher anything, she was tellingI cared to know, and she did so in her anxiety for me to avail myself of her services exclusively