Part 15 (1/2)

”Yeah, but before you do, I'll have time to get used to you.” She paused. ”How about you? Are you okay with me?”

”You mean do I want you?”

”... yeah. You didn't exactly choose us.”

”I inherited you, both of you, from my father's family. You're mine.”

”You want us?”

I smiled up at her. ”Oh, yes.”

Thirteen.

We turned northeast again and drove until we found a place where we could go off a side road and camp in the woods, far enough away from the road and the highway to be invisible. I took a look around before I went to sleep, made sure there was no one near us, no one watching us.

After I got back, I asked Celia to stay awake and keep one of the guns handy until dark. She was a good shot, she'd had some rest, and she said she wasn't very tired. We had the three guns I had taken from the gunmen and Celia's handgun-a semiautomatic Beretta. She told me the gunmen had used silenced Heckler & Koch submachine guns. She said she'd never seen one before, but she'd read about them.

”The gunmen meant to kill us all, but to do it quietly,” she said. ”I don't think anyone heard the shooting over the noise of the fire and the distance between houses. We need to avoid these people, at least until we find a few more friends.”

I agreed with her. But at that moment, I just wanted to sleep. I went to sleep in the backseat of Wright's car and woke briefly as Wright lifted me out and put me down in Brook's car, where someone had folded the back seats down and spread clothing on them to make them less uncomfortable.

”What are you doing?” I whispered.

He climbed in, lay down beside me, and pulled me against him. ”Go back to sleep,” he said into my ear. I did. The makes.h.i.+ft bed turned out to be not so uncomfortable after all.

Then Brook lay down on the other side of me, and her scent disturbed me, made me want to get up and go sleep somewhere else. I tried to ignore it. Her scent would change, was already beginning to change. I slept.

Sometime later, after dark, I bit her.

She struggled. I had to hold her to keep her still and silent at first. Then, after a minute, she gave a long sigh and lay as I'd positioned her, accepting me as much as she could. She didn't enjoy herself, but after that first panic, she at least did not seem to be suffering.

I had only tasted her before. Now I took a full meal from her-not an emotionally satisfying meal, but a physically sustaining one. Afterward, I spent time lapping at the wound until she truly relaxed against me. She eased back into sleep and never noticed when I got up, stepped over her, and got out of the car.

I closed the door as quietly as I could and stood beside it. Not being fully satisfied made me restless. I paced away from the car, then back toward it. I found myself wondering whether Brook, Celia, and Theodora would be better able to sustain me when they were as fully mine as Wright was. Would they be enough? I was much smaller than my father who had preferred to have eight symbionts. My demands must be smaller.

Mustn't they?

I shook my head in disgust. My ignorance wasn't just annoying. It was dangerous. How could I take care of my symbionts when I didn't even know how to protect them from me?

I stopped beside the car and looked through its back window at Brook and Wright, now lying next to each other, both still asleep. Both had been touching me. Now that I had moved, they were almost touching one another.

My feelings s.h.i.+fted at once from fear for them to confusion. I wanted to crawl between them again and feel them both lying comfortably, rea.s.suringly against me. They were both mine. And yet there was something deeply right about seeing them together as they were.

Celia came up behind me, looked at me, glanced into the car, then drew me away from it. We went to the other car and sat there. ”I long for a shower,” I said.

”Me too,” Celia said. ”You mind if I go to sleep now?”

”Go ahead.” She had already climbed into the backseat of Wright's car. She put her handgun on the floor and lay on her back on the seat.

”I think I need to say something you won't like hearing,” she said.

”All right.”

She closed her eyes for several seconds, then said, ”Stefan told me what happened to Hugh Tang. He told me and he told Oriana Bernardi because he knew we both loved Hugh.”

Loved? I listened to her with growing confusion. I didn't know what to say so I said nothing.

”The relations.h.i.+p among an Ina and several symbionts is about the closest thing I've seen to a workable group marriage,” she said. ”With us, sometimes people got jealous and started to pull the family apart, and ... well ... Stefan would have to talk to them. He said the first time that happened, he was still living with his mothers and one of them had to tell him what to do, and even then he could hardly do it because he was feeling so confused himself. He didn't say 'jealous.' He said 'confused.'”

I nodded. ”Confused.”

”I don't really understand that, but then, we are different species.”

”How did you wind up with Hugh?”

She smiled. ”Hugh had been with Stefan for a few years when Stefan asked me to join him. When I'd been there for a while, Hugh asked for me. Stefan said that was up to me, so Hugh asked me. It scared me because I didn't understand at first how an Ina household works, that everyone went to Stefan, fed him, loved him, but that we could have relations.h.i.+ps with one another, too, or with other nearby symbionts. Well, I didn't go to Hugh when he first asked, but after a while, I did. He was a good man.”

”I'm sorry,” I said. ”I wish he hadn't found me when he did.”

”I know.”

I looked at her lying there, not looking at me. ”Thank you for telling me,” I said.

She nodded and looked at me finally. ”You're welcome. I didn't just say it for your benefit, though. I figure I might want to have a kid someday.”

I wanted that-a home in which my symbionts enjoyed being with me and enjoyed one another and raised their children as I raised mine. That felt right, felt good.

I left Celia alone so she could sleep, and I checked the area again to make sure we were still as alone as we seemed to be. Once I was sure of that, I set out at a jog, then a run to find out who our nearest neighbors were. I followed my nose and found a farm where two adults and four children lived, along with horses, chickens, geese, and goats. I found three other houses, widely separated along the side road, but without farm fields around them. I found no real community on the territory I covered.

It seemed we had privacy and a little more time to recover and decide what to do. I could question Celia and, in particular, Brook.

I went back to the cars and used some of the disposable wipes that Wright and Brook had bought to clean up as best I could. Then I put on clean clothes. As I got my jeans on, I heard Brook wake up and slip out of the car behind me. She made slightly different noises breathing and moving around than Wright or Celia did.

”G.o.d, it's dark out here,” she said. ”If I weren't a symbiont, I don't think I could see at all. Aren't you cold?”

I wasn't really, but I pulled on an unders.h.i.+rt, then put my long-sleeved s.h.i.+rt on, b.u.t.toned it, and pulled on my new jacket. ”I'm all right,” I said. ”I'm glad you're awake. I need to talk to you.”

”Sure.”

”Eat first. Do whatever you need to do. This will probably take a while.”

”That doesn't sound good.”

”I hope it won't be too bad. Your neck okay?”

She pulled her collar aside and showed me the half-healed wound. ”It ... wasn't so bad this time.”