Part 11 (2/2)

i hope he will for enny man whitch will fill up a swimming hole with old tin cans and gla.s.s had augt to be bit by a ratlesnaik.

October 21, 186---it has stoped raning today. for a wunder neether me or Beany or Pewt missed in our lesons. it dont verry often hapen that way.

i think old Francis thougt we was playing sum sort of a trick on him for he acked sort of quear and looked at us sort of hard. tonite we aranged to meat at Pewts at 8 oh clock. after school we got a meel bag and went down for our snaping tirtle.

it took nearly a hour to get him into the bag. ferst we had to ty up his mouth becaus we only want to scair old man Tilton and not to kill him. it took a haff hour to do that. we never cood have did it if it hadent ben for Pewt who can ty gnots like a sailer. ferst we got the old tirtle mad and then we give him a stick to bite and then i pulled at it and Beany pulled at the roap on his hine leg. of coa.r.s.e the snaper woodent let go of the stick and when his head was out strait Pewt put a noos round his mouth and wound it round and round like ganging a fishhook on a line and he tide that old tirtles mouth up t.i.ter than a drumhead.

then we tride to get him in the bag but it was all we cood do he claud so. bimby we got him in.

then we tide the bag under a bush down behine old Perry Moultons yard. then we went home. i split up my kinlins and done my ch.o.a.rs and studded till 8 oh clock and then mother sed i cood go down town with Beany. so i went over to Beanys and it was dark. so we got Pewt and went down and got the bag and carried it up Court strete and throug old Nat Gordons woods until we got to the feeld oposite old man Tiltons house.

it was a awful lug and i bet we put it down to rest 50 times but bimeby we got it there. then we tride to shaik the old snaper out of the bag and it seamed as if we never cood get him out. bimeby we got him out and lit sum maches to see his mouth was tide up t.i.te and it was and the stick was still there he coodent spitt it out. gosh but he was mad and tride to snap. there was a lite in old man Tiltons house and we cood see him setting by a table with a red cloth and a lamp with a red wick reading.

sumwhere in the back of the house was another lite and we could hear Peeliky Tiltons uncles practising band tunes on their horns. they was making a feerful noise so n.o.body heard us when we 3 tide the snapper to the dorgn.o.b. it was all we cood do he claued so. then when we had him hanging head downwerds we rung the bell as hard as we cood and hipered acrost the strete and hid in the bushes behine the fense.

we cood see old man Tilton put down his paper and holler sumthing. i gess he told Peeliky Tiltons uncles to stop their noise. ennyway it stoped and he lit a little tin lamp and come to the door and opened it. we cood hear the old tirtle scraching at the door and banging his head agenst it as he tried to snap and the old man heard it and when he opened the door he looked round throug his old specks and dident see ennything and then he steped out on the porch and stuck his hed round the door and i gess it was lucky he dident take the big lamp for when he see that old snaper swinging this way and that way clauing and snaping he let out a yell you cood heard for 3 miles and droped the lamp and almost tirned a back sumerset he tride so hard to get back into the house and slamed the door. then we heard him hollering for Peeliky Tiltons uncles and we cood see them come piling into the room and evryone talked. then they come out of the side door. Peeliky Tiltons uncle had a lantirn and a ax and his uncle George had a shot gun and a tin lamp and his uncle Warren had a pichfork and a torchlite percession torch and old man Tilton was looking out of the window. Ed went first with the lantern and when he saw what it was he sed it is a snaping tirtle as big as a wash boiler. sum darn fool has tide it to the gn.o.b. so George sed sumone cut the roap and we will get him and Warrin he sed look out them snapers will taik a mans hine leg off at 1 snap and Ed sed h.e.l.l i aint afrade and he cut the roap with his ax and the old snaper fell on the steps and begun to craul off and Ed grabed the roap and yanked him onto the sidewaulk and he sed hold the lite Warrin and let the snaper bite a stick and i will cut his hed off. so Warrin he held a lite and George got a stick and poaked him and the old snaper snaped but dident ketch hold and Ed he sed that is a h.e.l.l of a snaper. so George poaked him again and he kep snaping and bimeby Ed sed sum feller has tide up his mouth with a stick in it. so then n.o.body was afrade and they all gethered round and Peeliky and his father come out of their house and old man Tilton come out and sed things have come to a prety pa.s.s if a man cant go to his door without being et alive by a snaping tirtle or knawed by a rampaiging wilcat or pizened by a hoopskert.

he meant a hoop snaik but he was xcited, and if the polise dident do there duty he wood put it in the hands of the county solissiter and see is respectible citisens cood be et and lose their lifes without n.o.body doing ennything to stop it. and he sed do we live in Rooshy or Prooshy and dont a man have enny petection of the law? and he waulked up and down the porch and banged his cain and hollered and while he was hollering Ed and George and Warrin and Peeliky and Peelikys father was taiking the old snaper into the back yard and they cut his head off and Ed told Peeliky that the head woodent die for 7 days. then they come back and told the old man to shet up and Ed sed they was going to have tirtle soop and fride chicking, and rost beef and boiled ham and sossige and quale on tost and clamb chowder and pigs feet and pork sc.r.a.ps and hogs head cheze all out of that tirtle. but the old man kep a hollering and asking if he lived in Rooshy and Ed sed the old man will feal better tomorrow when he has drunk about a quat of soop and et 4 or 5 pounds of diferent kinds of meet from that old snaper.

well bimeby they went in and the old man went in and set down and they begun to play on their horns and we clim over the fense and went home. i gess we scart the old man most to deth. if you had saw him let out the yell and heard him tirn the back somerset you wood have thougt so. we aint throug with him yet. a man whitch will stop up a swiming hol with tin cans and broaken gla.s.s aint going to get off with lesson. and wire two whitch is c.u.mtimes wirse. and hoopskerts.

then we all went down town and come up throug Coart Strete laffing and talking about what we see in the store winders so our folks wood know we had been down town. mother sed i was prety lait and sed that father sed i hadent augt to be out so lait but she told him i asted if i cood go and she sed yes.

she told me i must come home erlier next time. father had went to bed so i dident see him and he dident yip.

it was the most sucesful meating the Terible 3 has had. i have got to wright out the report for Pewt becaus i can spel so mutch beter than Pewt can. so i cant wright moar tonite in this diry.

October 28, 186---today the ferst thing i see was old man Tilton coming down town with his old cain. he glore at me when i met him and i sed how do you do mister Tilton and he sed how do how do and waulked on. so i know he doesnt suspeck us.

i bet he woodent say how do to Gimmy Fitzgerald or Moog Carter or Luke Mannix or Ticky Moses.

i wached him and he went into the polise stasion.

then he come out and talked with old Swane and old Mizzery Durgin the polise oficers. his naim is Ezry but we call him Mizzery. he is the feller that throwed me out of the town hall the nite father was going to maik a speach and dident da.s.s to. old man Tilton pounded his cain on the ground and hollered. i coodent hear what he sed except Rooshy and Prooshy so i gess he was triing to find out where he lived becaus he wanted to know last nite and n.o.body told him. i gess he hasent et enny of that soop yet. i wish we cood have kep that tirtle. it wood have fed Hork and Spitt for 2 weaks. i cougt a rat today. an old linger and they toar him up and et him. Spitt had the ferst whack at him and i thougt he wasent going to leeve no coar so i poaked a part of it out with a stick and gave it to Hork. if i kep Hork and Spitt together they wood eet eech other up. i wunder if they wood be ennything left when they got throug.

ennyway a bullfrog can eet another bullfrog as big as he is. the one that gets the first snap gets the other and swalows him down his gozzle with his feet sticking out of the corner of his mouth. A bullfrog swalows the other bullfrog hoal. he chews him up inside like a hen or a boar constricter only he dont squash him ferst. i am glad i am not a bullfrog and havent enny teeth in my stomack. how cood a dentist pull a tooth in a fellers stomack if it aiked. how cood a feller tell wether it was a tooth aik or a stomack aik. wood a feller die if he maid a mistaik and had a dentist pull a tooth whitch was in his stomack when it dident aik but his stomack did.

if i was a bullfrog i shood like to know them things.

but i aint a bullfrog and i shant have enny teeth in my stomack unless when i am old and have false teeth i swalow them when i am aslep as old man Collins did onct.

tonite we had company. Aunt Mary and Charles and Helen and Cad Smith and Steve and Ann Maria Piper and Annie Piper, and so i coodent go out after supper but had to stay in and hear Keene and Cele sing. i can hear them enny day and i had agreed to go out with Pewt and Beany and try to brake sum of J. Albert Clarks windows to pay for telling father when i let out his rooster to fite mine and mine licked his. if his had licked mine old J.

Albert woodent have yipped. i dont blaim him for being mad becaus i let them fite when he wasent there to see and becaus mine licked but no feller that is a real feller will go tattle taleing to a fellers father and get him kep in the yard a hoal day. if he had given me a bat in the ear or had hit me a paist with his cain i woodent have caired but a feller that tells on another has got sumthing to learn and that is what the Terible 3 is for. to lern fellers to behave.

so i coodent go out and Pewt and Beany sed they wood try to do it without me. they sed they wood go up to Pewts yard again and wood try sum grean apples on a stick and aim more to the rite than they did when they broak old J. Ward Levitts windows whitch the stewdcats paid for brakeing. so i kep my ey pealed becaus J. Albert lives in the other side of our house and i gnew if ennyone broak his winders old J. Albert wood come piling in to tell father it was me and father cood tell him he was a dam lier becaus i wood be there with father all the time and father wood know i hadent went out for a minit.

so i set in the parlor and father told the story about the feller whitch got the long hair in his mouth and lots of stories that maid us nearly kill ourselfs laffing. then Cele and Keene sung flow gently sweet Afton and pa.s.s under the road and we shall meat but we shall miss him and my mother bids me bang my hair and then father maid me sing alone. i hait to sing alone. i cood have sung with Keene but he maid me sing alone. i sed what shall i sing and he sed sing ennything. so i sung a new virse of if ever i ceese to love. it goes this way

if ever i ceese to love if ever i ceese to love may Horris Greelys cat have kittens in his hat if ever i ceese to love

well father and Steve and Ann Maria and Aunt Sarah and Aunt Mary and Charles and mother all laffed but Cele and Keene and Annie Piper sed i was very disgusting. ennyway father sed i cood sing ennything.

well after i had sung Cele and Keene were playing a peace about Napolion crossing the Alps when there was a big gingle of gla.s.s and a hard apple came wizzing throug the window and came within a inch of taiking Steve on the snoot. Keene gave a screech and evryone gumped up jest as another hit the side of the house bang. father was out of the house and down the steps in 2 minits and i after him. the stewdcats in old mister Heads house were setting by their table studding in there shert sleaves and we heard sum one down the strete and father hipered down strete and i after him. we met Nipper Brown and his father and father he sed have you met enny fellers Gus and Nippers father he sed yes 2 fellers ran down Clifford Strete and me and father went down Clifford strete and coodent see enny fellers. so we went back and i picked up a rock and put it in my pocket. when i ran out after father i picked up the apple and n.o.body had seen it.

i gnew if father see that apple with a hole in it he wood know it was throwed with a stick and he wood know in a minit who broak old J. Ward Levitts winders.

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