Part 5 (1/2)

Then a woman sed you are the wirst boy in town and you are jest like your father was, and i sed i gess if you gnew what my father sed about you you woodent say much more and she tirned red and sed if that boy stays here i wont. it is a shaim to have sutch a boy at a desent picnic or with desent peeple.

then they all got round me and jawed me and the minister sed i must go home and i sed all rite if i have got to go i wil taik my boat, and he sed verry well take your boat and go. i am verry mutch disapointed in you. then i sed ennyway i want my fifty cents and they all sed dont you give him a cent he has been a newsense. then i sed it may be all rite to call a feller a newsence after he has rew about a hundred peeple more than fifty miles and luged barils stuff up the bank and made reaths and picked flowers and rescued peeple from drownding whitch dident know enuf to sit in a boat, but i aint going till i get my fifty cents then they sed if i dident go rite off they wood lick me and i woodent get my fifty cents.

so i got into my boat and rew up river. then i rew back and kept in the middle of the river and began to holer things to Beany. i gnew they coodent drive me off the river so i hollered to Beany did you see old Misses Peezley have that fit? gosh i bet she maiks old man Peezley stand round. peraps that is why he is baldheaded. Beany dident da.s.s to say nothing.

then i hollered Beany did you hear old decon Aspinwall sware at me? he wanted to know what in hel and damation i was triing to do. that is prety talk for a decon aint it?

i shood think he wood feel ashaimed the nex time he speeks in prair meeting.

i cood see the decon talking to the minister xcited, and Misses Peezley was talking xcited two. but Beany dident da.s.s to say nothing. so i hollered again to Beany did you see old Rhody Shatuck hold up her skirts and hiper for the woods? did you ever see sutch skinny legs? then old man Shatuck run down the bank and hunted round for a rock but i gnew he coodent find one becaus there aint enny rocks there and he tride to break a lim off a tree to plug at me and he hollered and sed he would brake my back, but i gnew he coodent get me and i hollered again to Beany o Beany aint it lucky the minister is married becaus all the wimmen is hanging round him and Beany dident da.s.s to say nothing, but they all got together and talked and then the minister come down the bank and called me to come in and he wood give me my fifty cents if i wood go strait home but i sed not mutch i dont come where you can get a holt on me and lam time out of me.

well he sed i will not hurt you but i sed you sed you wood pay me and you dident and i cant trust you. he turned red as a beat and sed i am verry sorry that you acuse me of being untroothful but here is your money if you will come near enuf so i can toss it into the boat. so i backed the boat in holding my oars ready to row out if he tride to grab the boat or to gump in but he dident do eether but throwed the fifty cent peace into the boat and i started for home.

i gess it was about time for i began to feel prety quear. my head aked and there was black specks before my eys and my face and hands burned like fire and smarted and my boans aked.

i gess i shall have to stop here for i hear mother coming up with my chicken broth and tost and am most starved to deth. father says i weig 2 pounds less than nothing and my arms and legs is jest like pipe stems or spider legs.

Continnude from the last.

August 29 186---when i got home i hiched the boat and my head went round so i had to set down.

then i got up and went home. mother saw me and sed what is the matter with your face it is as red as fire. i sed i gess the muskeeters done it. she asted me if i wanted enny supper but i sed i dident ever want to eat again but i wanted a drink of water.

so i drunk sum water and went up stairs. then i begun to feel bad and caled mother and she come up jest in time. i was awful sick. father come up and Aunt Sarah and they held my head and run in and out of the room with wash boles and towels. o i was awful sick and mother sed for mersy sakes what have you been eating and father sed for G.o.ddlemity sake what haven't you been eating?

bimeby i felt a little better only my face and hands burned and itched. mother sed she dident like the looks of it and she never gnew a feller to be sick at his stomack with a red face and hands. so she wet a towel in cold water and put it on my face and hands and bimeby i gess i went to sleep.

sumtime in the nite i began to feel sick again and had awful panes in my stomack and i called mother again. this time i was awful sick again and father and mother and Aunt Sarah were verry busy for a long time. bimeby i wasent so sick to my stomack but my panes were wirse and father went for docter Perry. he was gone a long time before he come back with him. doctor Perry he took a look at me and sed poison ivory, so he got it did he. then he felt of my stomack and looked at by tung and felt my pulce and heard me grone and gave me a dose of castor oil and then he took out a little popsquirt the litlest i ever see and he sed i gess i shall have to give you a subteranian interjection. i thougt a interjection was a part of speach like alas and o and ah. ennyway that is what the grammar says.

but this wasent that kind for the docter run the sharp point of that little popsquert whitch was jest as sharp as a needle rite into my arm. it hurt like time and i hollered but after he had pulled it out i began to feel kind of lite and floty and the ferst i gnew the pane was gone and i dident know nothing more.

well the next morning i felt a little beter but not enuf to get up and not enuf to eat but after a while i felt wirse again and mother sent for doctor Perry again and he come and give me some more medecine and another subteranian interjection whitch put me to sleep again. the next time i woke up again i coodent open one ey and only see a teeny bit out of the other, but i felt better, only i iched feerful and smarted. doctor Perry laffed when he come in and sed i looked funny but not so funny as old E. O.

Luvrin. he sed all the peeple whitch set at one table had it and had it wirse than i did, but i was sicker the other way.

he sed that all the docters had been up day and nite and always were buzy when there was a chirch picknic. he sed that if he had his way chirch picknics wood not be aloud enny more than prize fites and c.o.c.k fites. he sed that the peple were prety mad with me and thougt i done it purpose, but he told them if i had done it a perpose i woodent have been fool enuf to tuch the ivory myself, whitch was prety good for the docter. ennyway i give him plenty of biziness. i suppose i hadent augt to have sed what i did about Missis Shatucks legs and old Misses Peezleys fit, but i aint sorry for what i sed about the old decon swaring. i hadent done nothing.

jest cougt a eal. i must have left him in the boat.

gosh when i get well enuf to go down to the boat he will be in auful smelly condition. i am sory i forgot him.

Well i had to stay in bed 4 days. most of the time i had web cloths on my head and coodent see nothing.

Cele come up and read Wild Mag the Trapers Bride and a new novil Dair Devvil Dave the Dead Shot.

she oferred to read the 92th palsam to me but i told her i dident feal strong enuf yet so she read 2 more chapters of Dair Devvil Dave instead.

Beany come over with a tame rat tide with a string. he wasent very tame and bit Beany 2 times. Potter Goram brogt his collexion of b.u.t.terflise and a live green snaik. mother woodent come in until he put the snaik in his poket. the 2 Chadwicks Puz and Bug came in twise and fit for me, in the ferst fite Puzzy got a black ey and in the 2th fite Bug got a bludy nose. they was good fites and jest about even. i tell you they is always redy to help a frend.

Ed Tole brougt up his rooster and had arainged a fite with Gimmy Fitzgeralds rooster but jest as they was going to set them a going the old minister called to see if i was ded and when he found i wasent he made a long call and praid fer me and told me i had sinned deaply but wood be forgiven if i had faith. all the time i cood see Ed and Gimmy peeking round the corner of the barn and wateing till the old minister had went so they cood have their rooster fite. i was afrade they wood have it behine the barn where i coodent see it and i thout that old minister never wood go. while he was there he saw the bible open to the 92th palsam and he sed it is very grattifiing to me to see that you are reading the bible and i sed i wasent reading it becaus i coodent read ennything yet, but my sister Cele comes up and reads to me and he sed she is a very good girl indeed and i have heard she is very diffeernt from the rest of the Shute family. i sed yes sir. then he looked round some moar and found Wild Mag the Trapers Bride whitch was rite on the table. i wood have hid it only i coodent get it unless i piled out of bed and i dident think it was proper to get up in my shert tale befoar the minister. so i hoaped he woodent see the novil but he did and he picked it up and looked at it and read the naim and held it jest as if it was a bull toad or a snaik and then he sed are you reading this vile trash and i sed yes sir, and he sed how cood you read it with your eyes swole up, and i sed i cood see sum. he sed you jest told me you coodent see to read. i dident know what to say so i sed yes sir. then he sed awful stern do you meen to tel me that your sister Celia---and jest then mother she come in and sed i am afrade mister Barrows that we hadent aught to disturb our pashent too long. he isent verry strong yet.

and he said that is true Misess Shute but he has made some staitments about this improper book that i think it is my duty to look into and he held up Wild Mag the Trapers Bride and mother she sed it seems as if Mr. Shute and i are compitent to deside what our children are to read.

and he sed but my dear Misses Shute this is a verry improper book indeed and mother she sed have you read it and he sed G.o.d forbid i wood not disgraice my inteligents by reading sutch a book, and my mother she sed how do you know then it is a impropper book without reading it? and he sed how can a bok of the naim of Wild Mag the Trapers Bride be a good book and mother she sed she had read it and there was nothing impropper at all in it.