Part 4 (1/2)
RIDDLES BY A WRETCH.--_Q._ What is the difference between a surgeon and a wizard?
_A._ The one is a cupper and the other is a sorcerer.
_Q._ Why is America like the act of reflection?
_A._ Because it is a roomy-nation.
_Q._ Why is your pretty cousin like an alabaster vase?
_A._ Because she is an _objet de looks_.
_Q._ How is it that a man born in Truro can never be an Irishman?
_A._ Because he always is a true-Roman.
_Q._ Why is my game c.o.c.k like a bishop?
_A._ Because he has his crows here (_crozier_).
COUPLET BY A CYNIC
(_After reading certain Press Comments on the Picture Show_)
Philistine art may stand all critic shocks Whilst it gives private views--of pretty frocks!
[Ill.u.s.tration: RETALIATION.--
_Comic Man_ (_to unappreciated tenor, whose song has just been received in stony silence_). ”I say, you're not going to sing an encore, are you?”
_Unappreciated Tenor_ (_firmly_). ”Yes, I am. _Serve them right!_”]
[Ill.u.s.tration: AN INDUCEMENT.--
_Swedish Exercise Instructress._ ”Now, ladies, if you will only follow my directions carefully, it is quite possible that you may become even as I am!”]
[Ill.u.s.tration: MORE SWEDISH INSTRUCTION.--
_Instructress_ (_to exhausted cla.s.s, who have been hopping round room for some time_). ”Come! Come! That won't do at all. You _must_ look cheerful. Keep smiling--smiling all the time!”]