Volume Xi Part 25 (1/2)

BOLD. Madam, if it shall please you to entertain me, so; if not, I desire you not to misconstrue my goodwill. There's no harm done; the door's as big as it was, and your ladys.h.i.+p's own wishes crown your beauty with content. As for these frumping gallants, let them do their worst. It is not in man's power to hurt me. 'Tis well known I come not to be scoffed. A woman may bear and bear, till her back burst. I am a poor gentlewoman, and since virtue hath nowadays no other companion but poverty, I set the hare's head unto the goose giblets, and what I want one way, I hope I shall be enabled to supply the other.

FEE. An't please G.o.d, that thou wert not past children.

WID. Is't even so, my lord? Nay, good Princ.o.x, do not cry. I do entertain you. How do you occupy? What can you use?

BOLD. Anything fit to be put into the hands of a gentlewoman.

WID. What are your qualities?

BOLD. I can sleep on a low stool. If your ladys.h.i.+p be talking in the same room with any gentleman, I can read on a book, sing love-songs, look up at the loover light,[81] hear and be deaf, see and be blind, be ever dumb to your secrets, swear and equivocate, and whatsoever I spy, say the best.

WID. O rare crone, how art thou endued! But why did Master Bold's sister put you away?

BOLD. I beseech you, madam, to neglect that desire: though I know your ladys.h.i.+p's understanding to be sufficient to partake, or take in, the greatest secret can be imparted, yet----

WID. Nay, prythee, tell the cause. Come, here's none but friends.

BOLD. Faith, madam, heigho! I was (to confess truly) a little foolish in my last service to believe men's oaths, but I hope my example, though prejudicial to myself, will be beneficial to other young gentlewomen in service. My mistress's brother (the gentleman you named even now--Master Bold), having often attempted my honour, but finding it impregnable, vowed love and marriage to me at the last. I, a young thing and raw, being seduced, set my mind upon him, but friends contradicting the match, I fell into a grievous consumption; and upon my first recovery, lest the intended sacred ceremonies of nuptials should succeed, his sister, knowing this, thought it fit in her judgment we should be farther asunder, and so put me out of her service.

OMNES. Ha, ha, ha!

WID. G.o.d-a-mercy for this discovery, i' faith.

O man, what art thou when thy c.o.c.k is up?

Come, will your lords.h.i.+p walk in? 'tis dinner-time.

_Enter hastily_ SELDOM, _with papers on his arm_.

OMNES. Who's this? who's this?

MAID. This is our landlord, Master Seldom, an exceeding wise citizen, a very sufficient understanding man, and exceeding rich.

OMNES. Miracles are not ceased.

WID. Good morrow, landlord. Where have you been sweating?

SEL. Good morrow to your honours: thrift is industrious. Your ladys.h.i.+p knows we will not stick to sweat for our pleasures: how much more ought we to sweat for our profits! I am come from Master Ingen this morning, who is married, or to be married; and though your ladys.h.i.+p did not honour his nuptials with your presence, he hath by me sent each of you a pair of gloves, and Grace Seldom, my wife, is not forgot. [_Exit._

OMNES. G.o.d give him joy, G.o.d give him joy. [_Exeunt._[82]

MAID. Let all things most impossible change now!

O perjur'd man! oaths are but words, I see.

But wherefore should not we, that think we love Upon full merit, that same worth once ceasing, Surcease our love too, and find new desert?

Alas! we cannot; love's a pit which, when We fall into, we ne'er get out again: And this same horrid news which me a.s.saults, I would forget: love blanches blackest faults.

O, what path shall I tread for remedy But darkest shades, where love with death doth lie! [_Exit._

_Manent_ HUSBAND, WIFE, SUBTLE.

WIFE. Sir, I have often heard my husband speak Of your acquaintance.

HUS. Nay, my virtuous wife, Had it been but acquaintance, this his absence Had not appear'd so uncouth: but we two Were school-fellows together, born and nurs'd, Brought up, and liv'd since, like the Gemini: Had but one suck: the tavern or the ordinary, Ere I was married, that saw one of us Without the other, said we walk'd by halves.

Where, dear--dear friend, have you been all this while?

SUB. O most sweet friend, the world's so vicious, That had I with such familiarity Frequented you, since you were married, Possess'd and us'd your fortunes as before, As in like manner you commanded mine, The deprav'd thoughts of men would have proclaim'd Some scandalous rumours from this love of ours, As saying mine reflected on your lady; And what a wound had that been to our souls, When only friends.h.i.+p should have been the ground To hurt her honour and your confident peace, Spite of mine own approv'd integrity?