Volume I Part 5 (1/2)

TA. Yea, that I can well purvey, As good as ever you put to your nose, For there is a false wench called Rose Distilleth a quart every day.

SEN. By G.o.d! I would a pint of that Were poured even upon thy pate Before all this presence.

TA. Yet I had liever she and I Were both together secretly In some corner in the spence; For, by G.o.d, it is a pretty girl!

It is a world[19] to see her whirl, Dancing in a round; O Lord G.o.d! how she will trip!

She will bounce it, she will whip, Yea, clean above the ground!

HU. Well, let all such matters pa.s.s, I say, And get thee hence, and go thy way About this other matter.

TA. Then I go straight; lo! fare ye well.

SEN. But look yet thou remember every deal That I spake of full ere.

TA. Yes, I warrant you, do not fear.

[_Exit Taverner_.

HU. G.o.d's Lord! seest not who is here now?

What, Studious Desire! what news with you?

STU. Ye shall know, sir, ere I go.

SEN. What, art thou here? I see well, I, The mo knaves the worse company.

STU. Thy lewd conditions thou dost still occupy, As thou art wont to do.

HU. But, I say, who is this here in presence?

STU. Sir, this is the man called Experience, That I spake of before.

HU. Experience! why, is this he?

Sir, ye are right welcome unto me And shall be evermore!

EX. Sir, I thank you thereof heartily, But I a.s.sure you faithfully I have small courage here to tarry, As long as this man is here.

SEN. Why, wh.o.r.eson! what ailest at me?

EX. For thou hast ever so lewd a property, Science to despise, and yet thou art he That nought canst nor nought wilt learn.

SEN. Marry, avaunt, knave! I make G.o.d avow, I think myself as cunning as thou, And that shall I prove shortly!

I shall put thee a question now; come near, Let me see how well thou canst answer: How spellest this word Tom Couper In true orthography?

EX. Tom Couper, quotha? a wise question hardly!

SEN. Yea, I tell thee again yet--Tom Couper, how spellest it?

Lo! he hath forgotten, ye may see, The first word of his _a b c_.

Hark, fool, hark, I will teach thee, P.a--pa.--t.e.r--ter--do together Tom Couper.

Is not this a sore matter?

Lo! here you see him proved a fool!

He had more need to go to school, Than to come hither to clatter.

STU. Certain, this is a solution Meet for such a boy's question.

HU. Sensual Appet.i.te, I pray thee Let pa.s.s all trifles and vanity For a while, it shall not long be, And depart, I thee require; For I would talk a word or two With this man here, ere he hence go, For to satisfy my desire.

SEN. Why, Gog's soul! will ye so shortly Break pointment with yonder company, Where you should come to supper?

I trust you will not break promise so.

HU. I care not greatly, if I do; It is but a tavern matter.

SEN. Then will I go show them what you say.

HU. Spare not, if thou wilt go thy way, For I will here tarry.

SEN. Then adieu for a while, I tell you plain, But I promise you, when I come again, I shall make yonder knaves twain To repent and be sorry!

EX. Now I am full glad that he is gone!

STU. So am I, for good will he do none To no man living.

But this is the man with whom ye shall, I trust, be well content withal, And glad of his coming; For he hath expound cunningly Divers points of cosmography, In few words and short clause.

HU. So I understand he hath good science, And that he hath by plain experience Learned many a strange cause.

STU. Yea, sir, and I say for my part, He is the cunningest man in that art That ever I could find; For ask what question ye will do, How the earth is round, or other mo, He will satisfy your mind.

EX. Why, what doubt have ye therein found?

Think ye the earth should not be round?

Or else how suppose ye?

HU. One way it is round, I must consent, For this man proved it evident; Toward the east and occident It must needs round be.

EX. And likewise from the south to north.

HU. That point to prove were some thank worth.