Part 67 (1/2)

TIL. May th' frigid zone Sooner contract my sinews!

MOR. And love's grove Become an hermit's cell!

SAL. And our revels A sullen stoic dream.

PAL. And this exchange A period to our joys.

CAR. And our protests Affrighting shadows.

FLO. Or (what's worst of all) May those contents, which you expect from us, Discover our defects, and make you wish Your nuptial beds untouch'd.

ALL. May all these fall, And crush us with their grandeur.

LADIES. Be it so, And if our levity disvalue vows, Or what may most oblige us: may like censure Impeach our perish'd honours.

[_They retire._

1ST BOY. So: the match Is clapp'd already up. They need no witness.

2D BOY. Trust me, they couple handsomely, as if they had been married after th' new fas.h.i.+on.

1ST BOY. These need no dispensation. Fancy can act it without more ado. A mad match soon shuffled up!

2D BOY. But what shuffling would there be, if any of these wanton gossips should cry out before their time?

1ST BOY. That cry, my dainty wag, would be soon stifled. There be many ways, as I have heard my old grannam say (who had been in her youth a Paracelsian doctor's leman), to impregnate a birth, and, by secret applications o' possems[122] and cordials, not only to facilitate, but expedite, their production.

2D BOY. And what of all this?

1ST BOY. Why then, Tim, the only safe way for these gamesome macquerellas[123] is to antedate their conception before their separation. This has been an approved receipt; and, upon a long consult, found so, and returned authentic. Joy or grief produce wondrous effects in humorous[124] ladies.

2D BOY. Thou art a cunning, sifting ningle for all rogueries.

SCENE IV.

_Enter again the Ladies with their Platonic Confidants._

1ST BOY. What! so soon returned? upon my life, there's some amorous design on foot, either in displaying of the weakness of those rams'-heads whom they have deserted, or some pasquil of light mirth to ingratiate their late-entertained servants.

2D BOY. No drollery, for love sake: ”Facetious fancies are the least profane.”

1ST BOY. That's a precious strain of modesty, Nick: make much on't: let's fasten our attentions.

They are moving.

[BOYS _retire again_.

FLO. Dear Madam Fricase, present those scenes, Those love-attractive scenes, your n.o.ble self With these long-injur'd ladies tend'red To your prudential senate.

FRI. Sure, Florello, You much mistake them; can you call them scenes Which just complaints exhibit? True, they might,-- They might have prov'd to us, and to our honours That lay at stake, and by spectators thought Highly engag'd, nay, desperately expos'd To a judicial sentence--a decree Of fatal consequence.

CAR. But pregnant wits, Stor'd with maturest judgment, polite tongues, Calm'd an approaching storm.