Part 47 (1/2)
And that will make you happy?
Strubel.
Enormously!--For what makes us happy after all? A bit of happiness?
Great heavens, no! Happiness wears out like an old glove.
The Princess.
Well, then, what does?
Strubel.
Ah, how should I know! Any kind of a dream--a fancy--a wish unfulfilled--a sorrow that we coddle--some nothing which suddenly becomes everything to us. I shall always say to my pupils--”Young men, if you want to be happy as long as you live, create G.o.ds for yourselves in your own image; these G.o.ds will take care of your happiness.”
The Princess.
And what would the G.o.d be like that you would create?
Strubel.
_Would be? Is, my dear young lady, is!_--A man of the world, a gentleman, well bred, smiling, enjoying life--who looks out upon mankind from under bushy eyebrows, who knows Nietzsche and Stendhal by heart, and--(_pointing to his shoes_) who isn't down at the heels--a G.o.d, in short, worthy of my princess. I know perfectly well that all my life long I shall never do anything but crawl around on the ground like an industrious ant, but I know, too, that the G.o.d of my fancy will always take me by the collar when the proper moment comes and pull me up again into the clouds. Yes, up there I'm safe.--And your G.o.d, or rather your G.o.ddess--what would she look like?
The Princess (_thoughtfully_).
That's not easy to say. My G.o.ddess would be--a quiet, peaceful woman who would treasure a secret, little joy like the apple of her eye, who would know nothing of the world except what she wanted to know, and who would have the strength to make her own choice when it pleased her.
Strubel.
But that doesn't seem to me a particularly lofty aspiration, my dear young lady.
The Princess.
Lofty as the heavens, my friend.
Strubel.
My princess would be of a different opinion.
The Princess.
Do you think so?
Strubel.
For that's merely the ideal of every little country girl.
The Princess.
Not her ideal--her daily life which she counts as naught. It is my ideal because I can never attain it.