Part 72 (1/2)

”But I am only an old woman,--with a wig!”

”Age is always honorable, madam.”

”Now that is very prettily said, indeed you improve, sir. Do you know who I am?”

”No, madam; but I can guess.”

”Ah, well,--you shall talk to me. Now, sir,--begin. Talk to me of Cleone.”

”Madam--I had rather not.”

”Eh, sir,--you won't?”

”No, madam.”

”Why, then, I will!” Here the ancient lady glanced up at Barnabas with a malicious little smile. ”Let me see, now--what were her words?

'Spy,' I think. Ah, yes--'a creeping spy,' 'a fool' and 'a coward.'

Really, I don't think I could have bettered that--even in my best days,--especially the 'creeping spy.'”

”Madam,” said Barnabas in frowning surprise, ”you were listening?”

”At the back of the arbor,” she nodded, ”with my ear to the panelling, --I am sometimes a little deaf, you see.”

”You mean that you were--actually prying--?”

”And I enjoyed it all very much, especially your 'immaculate' speech, which was very heroic, but perfectly ridiculous, of course. Indeed, you are a dreadfully young, young sir, I fear. In future, I warn you not to tell a woman, too often, how much you respect her, or she'll begin to think you don't love her at all. To be over-respectful doesn't sit well on a lover, and 'tis most unfair and very trying to the lady, poor soul!”

”To hearken to a private conversation doesn't sit well on a lady, madam, or an honorable woman.”

”No, indeed, young sir. But then, you see, I'm neither. I'm only a d.u.c.h.ess, and a very old one at that, and I think I told you I wore a wig? But 'all the world loves a lover,' and so do I. As soon as ever I saw you I knew you for a lover of the 'everything-or-nothing' type.

Oh, yes, all lovers are of different types, sir, and I think I know 'em all. You see, when I was young and beautiful--ages ago--lovers were a hobby of mine,--I studied them, sir. And, of 'em all, I preferred the 'everything-or-nothing, fire-and-ice, kiss-me-or-kill-me'

type. That was why I followed you, that was why I watched and listened, and, I grieve to say, I didn't find you as deliciously brutal as I had hoped.”

”Brutal, madam? Indeed, I--”

”Of course! When you s.n.a.t.c.hed her up in your arms,--and I'll admit you did it very well,--when you had her there, you should have covered her with burning kisses, and with an oath after each. Girls like Cleone need a little brutality and--Ah! there's the Countess!

And smiling at me quite lovingly, I declare! Now I wonder what rod she has in pickle for me? Dear me, sir, how dusty your coat is! And spurred boots and buckskins are scarcely the mode for a garden fete.

Still, they're distinctive, and show off your leg to advantage, better than those abominable Cossack things,--and I doat upon a good leg--” But here she broke off and turned to greet the Countess,--a large, imposing, bony lady in a turban, with the eye and the beak of a hawk.

”My dearest Let.i.tia!”

”My dear d.u.c.h.ess,--my darling f.a.n.n.y, you 're younger than ever, positively you are,--I'd never have believed it!” cried the Countess, more hawk-like than ever. ”I heard you were failing fast, but now I look at you, dearest f.a.n.n.y, I vow you don't look a day older than seventy.”

”And I'm seventy-one, alas!” sighed the d.u.c.h.ess, her eyes young with mischief. ”And you, my sweetest creature,--how well you look! Who would ever imagine that we were at school together, Let.i.tia!”

”But indeed I was--quite an infant, f.a.n.n.y.”

”Quite, my love, and used to do my sums for me. But let me present to you a young friend of mine, Mr.--Mr.--dear, dear! I quite forget--my memory is going, you see, Let.i.tia! Mr.--”