Part 28 (1/2)

fat! I gonies! he's fat as a possum 'n 'simmon time. HE don't walk, can't; just naturally waddles on them little duck legs o'

hisn. An' he's got th' prettiest little ol' face; all red an'

white, an' as round's a walnut; an' a fringe of th' whitest hair you ever seed. An' clothes! Say, men.” In the pause the speaker deliberately relieved his overcharged mouth. The two in the mill waited breathlessly. ”Long tailed coat, stove pipe hat, an' cane with a gold head as big as a 'tater. 'Fo' G.o.d, men, there ain't been ary such a sight within a thousand miles of these here hills ever. An' doin's! My Lord, a'mighty!”

The thin form of the native doubled up as he broke into a laugh that echoed and re-echoed through the little valley, ending in a wild, ”Whoop-e-e-e. Say! When he got out of th' hack last night at th' Forks, Uncle Ike he catched sight o' him an' says, says he t'

me, 'Ba thundas! Lou, looky there! Talk 'bout prosperity. I'm dummed if there ain't ol' Santa Claus a comin' t' th' Forks in th'

summa time. 'Ba thundas! What!'

”An' when Santa come in, he--he wanted--Now what d' you reckon he wanted? A BATH! Yes, sir-e-e. Dad burn me, 'f he didn't. A bath!

Whoop-e-e, you ought t' seen Uncle Ike! He told him, 'Ba thundas!'

he could give him a bite to eat an' a place to sleep, but he'd be pisined bit by rattlers, clawed by wild cats, chawed by the hogs, et by buzzards, an' everlastin'ly d.a.m.ned 'fore he'd tote water 'nough fer anybody t' swim in. 'Ba thundas! What!'

”What's he doin' here?” asked Mr. Matthews, when the mountaineer had recovered from another explosion.

Lou shook his head, as he straightened himself in the saddle.

”Blame me 'f I kin tell. Jest wouldn't tell 't all last night.

Wanted a BATH. Called Uncle Ike some new fangled kind of a savage, an' th' old man 'lowed he'd show him. He'd sure have him persecuted fer 'sultin' a gov'ment servant when th' inspector come around. Yes he did. Oh, thar was doin's at the Forks last night!”

Again the mail carrier's laugh echoed through the woods.

”Well, I must mosey along. He warn't up this mornin' when I left.

Reckon he'll show up 'round here sometime 'fore sun down. Him an'

Uncle Ike won't hitch worth a cent an' he'll be huntin' prouder folks. I done told th' old man he'd better herd him fer a spell, fer if he was t' get loose in these woods, there wouldn't be nary deer er bear left come Thanksgivin' time. Uncle Ike said 'Ba thundas!' he'd let me know that he warn't runnin' no dummed asylum. He 'lowed he was postmaster, 'Ba thundas!' an' had all he could do t' keep th' dad burned gov'ment straight.”

Late that afternoon Lou's prophecy was fulfilled. A wagon going down the Creek with a load of supplies for the distillery stopped at the mill shed and the stranger began climbing carefully down over the wheels. Budd Wilson on his high seat winked and nodded at Mr. Matthews and his son, as though it was the greatest joke of the season.

”Hold those horses, driver. Hold them tight; tight, sir.”

”Got 'em, Mister,” responded Budd promptly. The mules stood with drooping heads and sleepy eyes, the lines under their feet.

The gentleman was feeling carefully about the hub of the wheel with a foot that, stretch as he might, could not touch it by a good six inches.

”That's right, man, right,” he puffed. ”Hold them tight; tight.

Start now, break a leg sure, sure. Then what would Sarah and the girls do? Oh, blast it all, where is that step? Can't stay here all day. Bring a ladder. Bring a high chair, a table, a box, a big box, a--heh--heh--Look out, I say, look out! Blast it all, what do you mean?” This last was called forth by Young Matt lifting the little man bodily to the ground, as an ordinary man would lift a child.

To look up at the young giant, the stranger tipped back his head, until his s.h.i.+ning silk hat was in danger of falling in the dirt.

”Bless my soul, what a specimen! What a specimen!” Then with a twinkle in his eye, ”Which one of the boys are you, anyway?”

At this the three mountaineers roared with laughter. With his dumpy figure in the long coat, and his round face under the tall hat, the little man was irresistible. He fairly shone with good humor; his cheeks were polished like big red apples; his white hair had the l.u.s.ter of silver; his blue eyes twinkled; his silk hat glistened; his gold watch guard sparkled; his patent leathers glistened; and the cane with the big gold head gleamed in the sunlight.

”That's him, Doc,” called the driver. ”That's the feller what wallered Wash Gibbs like I was a tellin' ye. Strongest man in the hills he is. Dad burn me if I believe he knows how strong he is.”

”Doc--Doc--Dad burned--Doc,” muttered the stranger. ”What would Sarah and the girls say!” He waddled to the wagon, and reached up one fat hand with a half dollar to Budd, ”Here, driver, here. Get cigars with that; cigars, mind you, or candy. I stay here. Mind you don't get anything to drink; nothing to drink, I say.”

Budd gathered up the reins and woke the sleepy mules with a vigorous jerk. ”Nary a drink, Doc; nary a drink. Thank you kindly all the same. Got t' mosey 'long t' th' still now; ought t' o'

been there hour ago. 'f I can do anything fer you, jest le' me know. I live over on Sow c.o.o.n Gap, when I'm 't home. Come over an'