Part 16 (1/2)
She gave a condescending motion to her pretty neck, and said,
”I need hardly explain, Mr. Colman, why I have sought this interview.
You must by this time be aware how peculiar, how unreasonable indeed, your behavior was!”
”Pardon me! I do not see the necessity for a word on the matter. I leave by the first train in the morning!”
”I will not dwell on the rudeness of listening--”
”--To a review of my own book read by a friend!” interrupted Walter, with indignation; ”in a drawing-room where I sat right in front of you, and knew no reason why you should not see me! I did make a great mistake, but it was in trusting a lady who, an hour or two before, had offered to be my sister! How could I suspect she might speak of me in a way she would not like to hear!”
Lady Lufa was not quite prepared for the tone he took. She had expected to find him easy to cow. Her object was to bring him into humble acceptance of the treatment against which he had rebelled, lest he should afterward avenge himself! She sat a moment in silence.
”Such ignorance of the ways of the world,” she said, ”is excusable in a poet--especially--”
”Such a poet!” supplemented Walter, who found it difficult to keep his temper in face of her arrogance.
”But the world is made up of those that laugh and those that are laughed at.”
”They change places, however, sometimes!” said Walter--which alarmed Lufa, though she did not show her anxiety.
”Certainly!” she replied. ”Everybody laughs at everybody when he gets a chance! What is society but a club for mutual criticism! The business of its members is to pa.s.s judgment on each other! Why not take the accident, which seems so to annoy you, with the philosophy of a gentleman--like one of us! None of us think anything of what is said of us; we do not heed what we say of each other! Every one knows that all his friends pull him to pieces the moment he is out of sight--as heartily as they had just been a.s.sisting him to pull others to pieces.
Every gathering is a temporary committee, composed of those who are present, and sitting upon those whose who are not present. n.o.body dreams of courtesy extending beyond presence! when that is over, obligation is over. Any such imaginary restriction would render society impossible. It is only the most inexperienced person that could suppose things going on in his absence the same as in his presence! It is I who ought to be pitied, not you! I am the loser, not you!”
Walter bowed and was silent. He did not yet see her drift. If his regard had been worth anything, she certainly had lost a good deal, but, as it was, he did not understand how the loss could be of importance to her.
With sudden change of tone and expression, she broke out--
”Be generous, Walter! Forgive me. I will make any atonement you please, and never again speak of you as if you were not my own brother!”
”It is not of the least consequence how you speak of me now, Lady Lufa: I have had the good though painful fortune to learn your real feelings, and prefer the truth to the most agreeable deception. Your worst opinion of me I could have borne and loved you still; but there is nothing of you, no appearance of anything even, left to love! I know now that a woman may be sweet as Hybla honey, and false as an apple of Sodom!”
”Well, you _are_ ungenerous! I hope there are not many in the world to whom one might confess a fault and not be forgiven. This is indeed humiliating!”
”I beg your pardon; I heard no confession!”
”I asked you to forgive me.”
”For what?”
”For talking of you as I did.'
”Which you justified as the custom of society!”
”I confess, then, that in your case I ought not to have done so.”
”Then I forgive you; and we part in peace.”
”Is that what you call forgiveness?”