Part 2 (1/2)

”No, but I know that's the reason. I was so selfish; I should have kept my mouth shut.” Her finger tips clawed into her thighs. I momentarily wondered if she felt any pain or was just numb.

”Even if that is the reason why they left, it's the complete opposite of selfishness on your part. You were caring about others, not yourself.”

”It doesn't matter,” She snapped. ”They never returned and now I know why. They were torn to shreds by the d.a.m.ned tsunami.”

She grabbed the note from me and tore it to pieces.

[ Elle ]

Day came soon enough and we settled in to our beds, waiting for sleep to take us over. I could hear Tex's steady breathing from across the bunker. Despite his makes.h.i.+ft mattress beneath the ladder, he fell asleep quickly. He looked relaxed, but every once in a while he said something I couldn't quite make out. He said it with such sadness. I knew he was hiding something from me. Yesterday he was sitting across from me, deep in thought, and speaking without realizing it. Anxiety filled every crease on his face. I could smell his lie a mile away. It wasn't my place to ask though, so I let it go and allowed him to think that I believed his lie.

Tex never asked to use the other cot, but I wasn't surprised. He probably figured it out before I said anything about my parents. I couldn't believe that I had told him about my mom and dad. I had never said it out loud before and it made the whole situation feel real, final. I wondered if he had lost anyone and I wondered again how his left eye was blinded. I was still curious about where he was heading as well. What secrets did this man hold? Why did it matter to me? Maybe I was just so bored of life that Tex was my escape from its drudgery-something new to play with besides cards and board games. I had nothing else to do but try to pick him apart and see what made him tick.

”Dah...nee...bana...nee.” There it was again: Tex's incoherent thoughts becoming spoken words.

I rolled over and faced the s.h.i.+pping container wall. I dreamed of Tex teaching me new knife techniques with a banana while my parents were being consumed by a giant tidal wave in the background.

It was night and that meant Tex had to leave. I had actually enjoyed his company more than I thought I would. I hadn't really realized how utterly alone I had been until he came and I was scared to go back to that emptiness. I think, somewhere deep inside me, I always had a small gleaming of hope that my parents would come back to me. The small flame was extinguished yesterday by a monstrous wave. It hurt more than anything, but I was happy that I didn't have to hold on to that false hope any longer. Maybe I was supposed to find Tex for a reason. Maybe he was here to put all my pipe dreams to rest.

Whatever the reason was, it didn't matter. Tex was packing up his stuff, including some food I willingly surrendered to him. It was time to face the music and die alone. Overly dramatic, I know. I was sitting on my bed watching him, making a schedule in my head of the night's events.

Watch Tex leave.

Lock hatch behind him.

Sweep.

Make a mess just so I can clean and organize it.

Play Yahtzee with myself.

Eat lunch.

Play Solitaire.

Maybe finally make my parents' bed.

Eat dinner.

Contemplate the rest of my life (give or take a few weeks)

Go to bed.

”Hey, Kid,” Tex said, stuffing a little bag of beef jerky into the side pocket of his pack. I swear, if he called me that one more time.

”My. Name. Is.” The words escaped through gritted teeth. Before I could finish though, he interrupted. Again.

”I was thinking...” he began, picking up his pack and swinging it against his back. Something resembling a scroll flew out of it and landed at my feet. ”s.h.i.+t.” He spat.

What I didn't know then, when I was looking down at the laminated, rolled up piece of paper, was that I was staring at the rest of my life. When I leaned down and picked it up-what I didn't know was that I was holding onto my future. A future, at that moment, I didn't think existed past a few weeks.

I sat back on my bed and unrolled the paper. Everything in Tex's face told me he didn't want me to, but for once, curiosity saved the cat. It was a map of a desert-this desert. I recognized the jagged edges, the curves, the slopes of the mountains near my bunker. There were landmarks every few miles. Then there were safepoints spread even farther apart. Each safepoint was marked with a big red X. I followed a black line with my fingertip until it landed on a bright green circle that had Eden written above it.

”Eden,” I murmured to myself. Emerald green trees with succulent fruits, bright blue, rus.h.i.+ng waterfalls emptying into gla.s.sy lakes, and calm, gentle breezes all came to my mind. ”The beginning of man.” I looked at Tex who was motionless. I ran my finger along the thin edge of the plastic lamination. ”I'm guessing this is where you're headed? Am I right?” I pursed my lips and handed him the map. ”Eden, Tex? Really? Where did you find this? Is this even legit?”

He nodded.

”So, you were going to leave me here to die,” I said calmly with a killer undertone, ”after I saved your life and fed you? Is that it? You were going to live in a lap of luxury knowing that I was dead? Do you even have a conscience?” I was surprised how well I kept control of my emotions. I was back to being my combative self that I thought I had left behind at Tex's namesake.

”I was about to tell you a minute ago. Don't get your panties in a twist.” He yanked the map from my hands and rolled it up before shoving it in his pack.

”Excuse me? Likely story, Tex.” I said his name like it was a sour taste on my tongue.

”I'm serious, Blondie. Do you want to hitch a ride with me or not? Don't get me wrong, you've got a nice pad here, but you and I both know that it won't last another fifty years-you won't last another fifty years.”

”What if this map is a fake? Some kid's toy? What if we get to this so-called Eden and it's a dust bowl? Where did you even find that?”

Tex let out a slow, calm breath, obviously trying to keep under control just like I was. ”What do you have to lose, Kid? Huh? Look around! Nothing. You got p.i.s.sed at me for not telling you, and now you're trying to come up with a reason not to go. Make up your mind.”

”But...” I looked over to my parents' bed.

”They're not coming back. Even if they did, they would want you to find a better life than this. I'm sorry if that seems harsh, but it's the truth. We all have to look out for ourselves and I'm offering you the opportunity to do just that.”

I grabbed Teffy and held him in my lap, mulling over the entire situation. Obviously Tex was right, but it would feel so weird leaving this place. What if by some miracle my mom and dad were still alive? Leaving here would in a way be my final goodbye to my parents.