Part 50 (1/2)
On Sunday afternoon he went down to the Manor Farm. He found Anne upstairs in the big sitting-room.
”Oh Jerrold, darling, I didn't think you'd come so soon.”
”Maisie sent me.”
”Maisie?”
For the first time in his knowledge of her Anne looked frightened.
”Yes. She wants to know you. I'm to bring you to tea.”
”But--it's impossible. I can't know her. I don't want to. Can't you see how impossible it is?”
”No, I can't. It's perfectly natural. She's heard a lot about you.”
”I've no doubt she has. Jerrold--do you think she guesses?”
”About you and me? Never. It's the last thing she'd think of. She's absolutely guileless.”
”That makes it worse.”
”You don't know,” he said, ”how she feels about you. She's furious with these brutes here because they've cut you. She says she'll cut _them_ if they won't be decent to you.”
”Oh, worse and worse!”
”You're afraid of her?”
”I didn't know I was. But I am. Horribly afraid.”
”Really, Anne dear, there's nothing to be afraid of. She's not a bit dangerous.”
”Don't you see that that makes her dangerous, her not being? You've told me a hundred times how sweet she is. Well--I don't want to see how sweet she is.”
”Her sweetness doesn't matter.”
”It matters to me. If I once see her, Jerrold, nothing'll ever be the same again.”
”Darling, really it's the only thing you can do. Think. If you don't, can't you see how it'll give the show away? She'd wonder what on earth you meant by it. We've got to behave as if nothing had happened. This isn't behaving as if nothing had happened, is it?”
”No. You see, it has happened. Oh Jerrold, I wouldn't mind if only we could be straight about it. But it'll mean lying and lying, and I can't bear it. I'd rather go out and tell everybody and face the music.”
”So would I. But we can't.... Look here, Anne. We don't care a d.a.m.n what people think. You wouldn't care if we were found out to-morrow----”
”I wouldn't. It would be the best thing that could happen to us.”
”To us, yes. If Maisie divorced me. Then we could marry. It would be all right for us. Not for Maisie. You do care about hurting Maisie, don't you?”
”Yes. I couldn't bear her to be hurt. If only I needn't see her.”
”Darling, you must see her. You can't not. I want you to.”