Part 6 (1/2)
”You big meanie.”
”Where is our daughter, by the way?”
She studied the cone for a moment. ”Who?”
”Our daughter.”
”We have a daughter?”
”The pregnancy has finally eaten into your brain.”
”If I wasn't so hungry, I'd smash this ice cream into your face,” she said. ”Relax. Your parents are here. They're spending ridiculous amounts of money on her at the games.”
”My dad hates the fair.”
”No, he doesn't. He pretends to hate the fair. But he truly loves his granddaughter. Some things trump other things.”
That Julianne-ism about my father could not have been more true. He loved Carly more than just about anything else. It was going to be interesting to see how nuts he went over the new baby.
”So did you really yell at some old lady?”
I explained to her what occurred with Mama Biggs.
”I love how you promised to stay out of this,” Julianne noted, arching an eyebrow over what was left of the cone.
”I'm not officially in it yet,” I said weakly.
”Right,” she said. She polished off the ice cream and began working on the waffle cone itself. ”I'm sure Victor was over last night just to share recipes.”
”Yes. For clam chowder. He loves clam chowder.”
She rolled her eyes. ”Whatever. You better just make sure this in no way impacts the birth of your second child. Because if it does, you'll then be needing to ask Mama Biggs for a new place to live.”
I reached for the hand that wasn't covered in ice cream. ”Nothing will impact that.”
”Oh, don't try to be all sweet and romantic with me,” she said, wrinkling her nose. ”You aren't carrying a small beast in your stomach.”
”I know. You are. Thank you.”
”Yeah, sure. Whatever,” she said, finis.h.i.+ng off the last bits of cone. She wadded up the napkin and tossed it at me.
I caught it in midair. ”Can we talk about names?” I asked.
She stared at me, her eyes narrowed. ”Yes. After the baby is born, I will tell you what his or her name is.”
”That's not how it's supposed to work, Jules.”
She raised an eyebrow at me. ”Oh, really? So you're telling me that after forty-two weeks of nausea, heartburn, indigestion, and cramping-and not to mention stretch marks and saggy b.o.o.bs that will never go away-I have to share naming the baby with you?”
Put that way, I wasn't sure I had any ground to stand on.
She nodded. ”Yeah. That's what I thought. By the way, we're having s.e.x tonight.”
”That's quite the seduction.”
”I don't have time for seduction,” she said. ”I need this kid out of my stomach. The kid that I will name. p.r.o.nto. Having s.e.x with you is one way to make that happen.”
I smirked. ”Isn't that how we got here in the first place?”
”Shut up and come help me get up.”
I helped her get herself turned around and into a standing position. She wobbled for a moment, her hands perched on her sides as she got her bearings.
”So, I know you're going to that meeting tonight, but you will be home in time to have relations with me this evening,” she said. ”That is an order.”
”Yes, ma'am.”
”Everything I've read says that's one way to pop an overdue kid out.”
”So is induction,” I reminded her.
She shook her head. ”Seriously, Deuce. It's like you don't even know me. I am not being induced. I am having this baby naturally. Even if it kills me. Even if I have to have s.e.x with you when I'm eleventy weeks pregnant.”
”What if it doesn't work?”
She narrowed her eyes at me. ”Then I'll blame you.”
13.
My father grinned at me in a way that I knew meant he was about to have fun at my expense. ”Heard you've been making friends with Mama Biggs.”
Julianne and my mom were walking Carly through one of the animal barns and he and I were sitting on a bench, watching the throngs of people stroll up and down the fairgrounds. A lot of them were complaining about the 4-H stand not having any food, while stuffing their faces with sugary confections and greasy fried concoctions.
”I'm not sure you'd call it friends,” I said.
”No one's friends with that old codger,” he said. ”I'm surprised it wasn't her body you found in the freezer.”
I ignored his sarcasm. ”I think everyone's too afraid of her to do anything to her.”
My dad nodded. ”Probably so. She usually has everyone on their heels. Glad you put her in her place.”
”Not sure anyone can really put her in her place.”
”Just not taking her c.r.a.p in public was a good start,” he said, still nodding. ”I would've kicked your b.u.t.t if you'd let her knock you around.”
”Not sure you can get your leg up that high anymore.”