Part 2 (1/2)

Wayren nodded. ”No one can see it but you. It's a gift. But more than that, it's a responsibility. Now ... hold her hand, for she'll need you to help her. She's about to leave us.”

Selena didn't understand how the woman was going to leave if she held her hand, but she did as her guide said. Grasping fragile, skinny fingers, she looked into the elderly woman's gray-brown eyes.

The flurry of glittering gray and blue fog grew larger and she knew something was going to happen. ”Hold on to my hand,” Selena said, not knowing what prompted those words. ”I'll be here.”

And so it had happened. Selena hadn't been frightened, or even particularly sad. She gained those attributes as she grew older and began to understand what it meant to the people left behind.

It took her longer to realize what Wayren had meant about it being a responsibility-that it was something she must employ, must use to help people find their way from life into death. She helped ease their discomforts-pains physical and, more importantly, emotional and spiritual.

But the greatest part of her calling she didn't learn until she was much older, when she discovered the power of the crystal and what she had to do with it.

Giving herself a little mental shake, and coming back to the present, Selena gathered up Theo's refilled mug and a clean spoon. After a moment of thought, she added a hunk of bread studded with sunflower seeds to a small plate. He looked hungry enough. As she pa.s.sed by the window, she couldn't ignore that the sun had lowered to rest on the horizon, an infinite expanse away.

Darkness in a few hours. Night seemed to come so much more quickly lately. Too quickly. Night seemed to come so much more quickly lately. Too quickly.

She'd have to go out into it too. Find whatever zombies she could-or have them find her. Selena looked into the distance, toward the purple-gray jut of the mountains, the dull green of forest, and the boxy shapes of ruined buildings studding the s.p.a.ce between. So peaceful. Now. So peaceful. Now.

But soon . ..

I could stay in tonight.

The temptation seized her, tightened like a vise on her throat. Just one night. Just one night.

She could sit with her patients, she could even exchange jokingly rude comments with miraculous Theo, watch him gulp down more soup. Maybe even see if he'd give her a decent game of chess since no one else could; or if he'd try and figure out how to fix the old DVD player that had finally ground to a halt.

Staring at the long shadows, and at the same time watching for the hulking movements of the zombies, Selena's shoulders tightened. She felt as if her muscles would snap at the slightest movement.

She knew she couldn't save them all. Of course she couldn't save them all. Just as she couldn't ease every dying person into the next plane.

She could stay in.

But I wouldn't, dammit.

She would't.

Because it was her gift. And her responsibility.

Chapter 2.

When Theo battled through the dreams and dragged his eyes open, it was dark. But this time, he didn't need a moment to recall where he was.

”Ruuu-uuuthhhh. Ruthhhhhh.”

The distant, mournful cries of the zombie-like gangas gangas filtered through the silence, and at first he thought they'd followed him from out of his dreams. The window next to Theo was open; a fresh night breeze streamed over his clammy skin. Damp and sticky he was, from the memories of death and destruction, as vivid and horrifying now as they had been in reality fifty years ago ... and over all the years since. He closed his eyes, trying to banish the remnants of the nightmares that clung like stubborn moss. They wouldn't release him. filtered through the silence, and at first he thought they'd followed him from out of his dreams. The window next to Theo was open; a fresh night breeze streamed over his clammy skin. Damp and sticky he was, from the memories of death and destruction, as vivid and horrifying now as they had been in reality fifty years ago ... and over all the years since. He closed his eyes, trying to banish the remnants of the nightmares that clung like stubborn moss. They wouldn't release him.

They didn't come every night, not anymore. But often enough that he had to drag himself free, and that the nights he didn't, he awoke grateful for a full sleep.

”Ruuuuuuuthhhh.”

The hair on his body rose when he realized the groaning monsters were the real ones, out there somewhere in the night.

Still p.r.o.ne, he stared out the window, able to see only the black sky twinkling with stars. In the distance, he could make out a few awkward shadows with orange eyes, lurching and lost, beyond the other side of the safe wall enclosing the area. Zombie-like gangas gangas, searching for a man named Remington Truth.

And somewhere out there, beyond, miles away, was Envy. And Sage.

With Simon.

Theo's mouth twisted, flattened, in the dark where there was no one to witness his weakness. His heart hurt. Emptied. Why not me? Why not me?

And what now? It would be a long time until he could bear seeing her with someone else. It would be a long time until he could bear seeing her with someone else.

From beyond the gently wafting blanket walls, Theo heard soft muttering, likely a fellow patient, followed by the rustle of bedding. Someone murmured back, low and soothing, and he wondered if it was the Death Lady crooning to one of her charges. What exactly did she do besides hold their hands and offer them pot? What exactly did she do besides hold their hands and offer them pot?

What a depressing job. Watching people die. His mouth flattened again.

He'd seen enough suffering and death in his lifetime; more than most people of his generation would have ever expected. And he had so often relived the tragedies in dreams and memories that he couldn't imagine choosing choosing to face them every single day. to face them every single day.

And yet ... that woman, the Death Lady, had a peaceful, accepting aura about her.

Other than her offering of a replenishment of his broth, along with a hunk of thick, dark bread, Selena hadn't made another appearance-at least not in Theo's carrel. But her friend, the older, plumper woman whose name was Vonnie, had come by several times before night fell and the lights were turned off. She'd helped him wash up and get comfortable, all the while chattering on about ... well, everything. To his mind, she seemed much too light and enthusiastic to be hanging around dying people all the time-knowing there was nothing that could be done for them but watch them in pain and weakness.

Within Vonnie's nonstop prattle, she made a point of saying more than once that never before had one of Selena's patients recovered as Theo had, which led him to his own snarly, grumpy thoughts: So why change her track record now? So why change her track record now?

And who the h.e.l.l had seen fit to resurrect me from the dead-a second time? Wasn't once enough?

Theo sighed and stared at the ceiling. Okay, so here he was again: should have been dead; brought back to life- For what? For what? And why me? And why me?

h.e.l.l, he'd asked these questions for the last fifty years, and hadn't gotten an answer yet. He'd been searching for the reason he'd been transformed-or not-and the purpose. He'd been going through life since then, watching and waiting for some great event to explain it all.

But nothing. Just days and days and years and years of trying to get beyond the horror of losing everything he'd ever known, except for Lou.

Lou.

Dammit.

His twin was probably worried beyond sick. And Theo had hardly given him a thought, being dead and all.

Though it wasn't as if he hadn't squeaked by death before. Lou said Theo had more lives than a cat, and that had been even before the Change. And since then ... well, only a month ago, he'd been trapped by gangas gangas in an old shopping mall with Elliott. And that was only the most recent brush he'd had with the Grim Reaper-other than this one. in an old shopping mall with Elliott. And that was only the most recent brush he'd had with the Grim Reaper-other than this one.

He really had tried to curb his recklessness, his yen for adventure, in hopes that he and Sage would get together. She was quiet and studious and shy, and he hadn't wanted to intimidate or worry her. But that had obviously not mattered-because Simon was a man with a past of violence and death.

Now, in darkness cut only by the wisp of moonlight and a distant glow beyond the cloth dividers, Theo pulled himself upright with sharp, frustrated movements. Easier to do now anyway, when he couldn't see the room spinning quite so well. Head pounding. Ugh Ugh.

He had to contact his brother. His feet touched the floor, identifying some sort of b.u.mpy, soft covering. He s.h.i.+fted off the edge of the bed ... and had to grab at the table to keep himself from cras.h.i.+ng to the floor as his knees buckled.

Guess I was only mostly dead. The reference to the old movie made him smile in spite of himself, and he imagined Lou responding, Have fun storming the castle! Have fun storming the castle!