Part 32 (1/2)
”Now I see. How could I have missed all the concern and love hid- den in those two little letters?” Becca started laughing, which started her coughing.
”You totally deserve that cough. The text wasn't that bad.” I -1- scowled.
0- ”You're right.” She sipped from a cup near her bed, and her
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cough eventually subsided. ”You could have asked, 'How's your dead brother?' ”
”If I'm that awful, why are you even friends with me?” I stood up, hurt by the coldness Becca implied.
”Hey, Alex, sorry. You don't usually seem to care about being a coldhearted b.i.t.c.h.”
”Not making this better,” I noted.
”That's where so much of your charm is, Alex. It's one of the reasons I love you. And probably why Leo does-” I glanced hard at her. ”Did. Maybe. Well, he liked you at least, right?”
”I guess,” I conceded.
Could he ever again? Was that what I wanted?
A text buzzed on my phone. Becca and I locked eyes. ”Open it!”
she prodded.
It was a reply from Leo. One word.
Going ”What the f.u.c.k does that mean? Was he planning on writing more and sent it by accident?” I shook my phone, willing it to spit out extra words.
”I think it means he's going,” Becca suggested.
”He didn't say anything about seeing me.”
”He didn't say anything about your thoughtful use of the word 'hi' either. Maybe he was in a hurry.”
”Maybe he was in the middle of f.u.c.king some other girl.” My brain went to a terrible place.
”Alex, I'm sure he wouldn't stop having s.e.x just to answer your text. And besides, the two of you were never just f.u.c.king.”
”I don't feel any better,” I admitted.
--1 ”He bothered to write you back. That's something.”
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”You're reaching, Becca.”
”Maybe. But what's wrong with that? If we don't reach for things, think of how much we'll miss.”
Then Becca fell asleep.
Her words were generically profound, like a Hallmark card I'd skim over to get to the check. But they made sense, too. How far I was willing to reach for Leo, I just didn't know yet.
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CHAPTER.
31.