Part 63 (1/2)
”I accept my numerous sins, but I will not be accused of seducing you in that conservatory and ensuring we would be discovered.”
Amelia bit her bottom lip, the agonizing memory of that night seared into her mind.
The dazzling pleasure of strolling about the crowded ballroom on Justin's arm, knowing she was the envy of every female in London. Preening beneath his bold glances of frustrated desire, and s.h.i.+vering when he had bent his head to whisper in her ear. And then he had urged her from the ballroom, leading her through the maze of hallways until at last they were alone in the perfumed shadows of the conservatory.
She s.h.i.+vered, still able to feel the branding heat of his kisses and the intimate exploration of his hands. She had been so eager for him that she had not even considered the dangers of allowing him to peel away her G.o.d-awful dress. Her only thought was the shocking pleasure of his lips closing around the tip of her breast as he had suckled her with obvious skill.
It was not until the door to the conservatory had been thrust open and the sound of shocked voices had shattered the illusion of privacy that she had realized just how stupid she had been.
”Are you telling me that my mother urged you to lure me from the ballroom and remove my gown?” she gritted.
”No.” His hooded gaze swept over her pale face. ”But, I have never disguised the fact that I desired you from the moment I first held you in my arms and we waltzed across the floor of Almack's. By the evening of Lady Granville's ball I was nearly mad with my need to a.s.suage my hunger for you.” As if to prove his point, Justin wrapped his arms around her and hauled her roughly against his aroused body. ”And in all honesty, if we had not been interrupted, I am not entirely certain I could have halted my urge to take your innocence regardless of the discomforts of our surroundings, or the obvious danger of discovery.”
Her mouth went dry at the potent feel of his erection pressed against her hip, his warm scent teasing at her senses. A melting heat flowed like lava through her veins, pooling in her lower stomach.
”Then how can you possibly blame my mother?” she rasped.
As if sensing her grudging reaction to his touch, Justin skimmed his hands down her back, his eyes darkening to molten gold. ”If nothing else, your mother has always been a clever woman capable of taking advantage of any situation.”
She could not argue the truth of his words. Her mother possessed a calculating mind and a ruthless lack of sentimentality when it came to using her daughter to achieve her own social ambitions.
”My mother wanted me wed, not get involved in a scandal that might very well have ruined me,” she protested.
”Correction, my love, she wanted you to capture a t.i.tle. The greater the t.i.tle the better.”
”Why you . . .”
He easily caught the hand she lifted to slap his face, pulling it to his mouth so he could press his lips to her palm.
”Steady, Amelia,” he murmured.
”Are you implying that my mother a.s.sumed that the only means for me to acquire a husband was by trapping him with public humiliation?” she hissed.
”Calm down and listen to me.”
”Have you not insulted me enough for one evening?”
”I am well aware you had received any number of proposals before we were introduced.”
She curled her lip in disdain. ”Worthless fortune-hunters.”
He ignored her insult. ”And that you refused them all.”
”I had a ridiculous hope that I might actually discover a gentleman who could care for more than my dowry. Stupid, of course.”
He grimaced, as if her jab had struck a nerve, but his expression remained grimly determined. ”It is my belief that your mother learned that my estates were heavily mortgaged and suspected that once you learned the truth of my need for . . .”
”My money?” she sweetly supplied, startled by a small pang of regret as his cheekbones darkened with a humiliated flush.
”For a loan,” he corrected in a raw tone. ”Your mother no doubt feared that you would turn away my impending offer of marriage as well.”
”As I most certainly would have.”
”Consider, Amelia.” He peered deep into her eyes, as if willing her to believe his words. ”Your mother was quite anxious for you to acquire a t.i.tle and it was unlikely that there would be a n.o.bleman greater than an earl to court you. Would she have meekly allowed such an opportunity to slip away without making an effort to push you into marriage?”
Amelia frowned, suddenly recalling that it had been her mother who had first entered the conservatory and promptly screamed to ensure that everyone at the ball was aware of Amelia's humiliation. She also recalled that her mother had not been nearly so shocked as she should have been when Amelia revealed Justin was a common fortune-hunter. Indeed, her mother had pressed even harder for a swift wedding.
At the time, Amelia had a.s.sumed that her mother was motivated by her horror at having an unwed daughter who was tarnished goods. Now, she realized that it might very well have been an obsessive desire to have her daughter wed to an earl.
”This is all conjecture,” she muttered. ”You have no proof.”
”No, I have no proof,” he readily agreed, ”but I have spent many long nights recalling our brief courts.h.i.+p and the events leading up to our fateful tryst in the conservatory.”
”Even if what you claim is true, it changes nothing.”
”You are mistaken, Amelia, it changes everything.” With a smooth movement, he swept her in his arms and headed back to the bed. ”You can no longer accuse me of deliberately causing our scandal. It was never my intent to force you into marriage.”
Amelia felt a dangerous crack in the ice she had built around her heart. What if he spoke the truth? What if he had never led her into the conservatory to compromise her? What if he had been as overwhelmed as she by the heady pa.s.sion that even now swirled through her body? What if . . .
She shook her head. d.a.m.n him.
”Did you ever intend to tell me the truth?” she demanded as he lowered her on to the mattress and stretched out beside her, his fingers tangling in her hair.
”What truth?” he asked, a savage hunger tightening his features. ”That you fascinated me from the moment we met? That I treasure our time spent together? That I desired you beyond all reason and that the thought of you carrying my child filled me with a need I could barely control?”
His child? Amelia quivered at the compelling thought of Justin's baby growing inside her.
”The truth that you wed me for my dowry,” she forced herself to say, as much to remind herself of this man's treachery as to continue the argument.
His head lowered, his eyes blazing with sensual intent. ”I wed you for many reasons, some of which I am still attempting to comprehend.”
”Justin . . .”
Her protest was ignored as he crushed her lips in a kiss that demanded her response.
For a heartbeat Amelia stood poised on a precipice. She understood the significance of this moment. She could turn Justin away and continue with their cold, distant relations.h.i.+p. Or she could give in to her desires and risk opening herself to yet another betrayal.
Perhaps sensing her fear, Justin lifted his head to reveal an expression of undisguised vulnerability. ”Amelia, please,” he pleaded, his hand trembling as he brushed his fingers over her cheek. ”I have hungered for you for so long.”
His hunger could not be any greater than hers, Amelia acknowledged. But trust was a fragile thing.
”Have you . . .” She bit her lip in embarra.s.sment.
”What? Ask me, my love,” he urged. ”I swear I will tell you nothing but the truth.”
”Have there been other women?” she demanded bluntly.
”No, Amelia.” A dark, possessive expression settled on his beautiful face. ”You are my wife. I want no other.”
The remaining ice that encased her heart shattered at the soft words and, with a small moan, she lifted her arms to wrap them around his neck. She did not know what tomorrow might bring, but for this night she could not deny the desire that had plagued her for so long.