Part 26 (1/2)
”It's not, a proposal, that is.” He shook his head. ”Only a fool would ask a question he knows the answer to, if that answer is not what he wants. I will not ask you until I know you will say yes.”
”Then I hope you are a patient man.” She wrapped the sheet around herself and slipped out of bed, glancing around, as always, for her clothes. ”As I cannot conceive of that happening.”
Without warning, he grabbed her and pulled her into his arms. ”You love me, you know.”
She stared into his eyes for an endless moment and considered denying it. At last she sighed in surrender. ”Yes, I suppose I do.”
”Good.” A slow, satisfied smile spread across his face. ”Someday, very soon now, you will agree marriage is the best gift we can give one another.”
”Really?” She forced a light tone to her voice. ”And I have always considered emeralds to be the best-”
”I want you in my bed every night and every morning.” He gazed down into her eyes. ”I want to introduce you to my family, my friends. I want to dance with you at grand b.a.l.l.s and picnic with you in public parks. And I want you by my side on the day I breathe my last.”
”Goodness, Max,” she said weakly. ”All that?”
”All that and more. I want you to be the mother of my children.” His tone hardened. ”And I want to be the father to your children.”
”It does tend to work better that way.”
His eyes narrowed. ”You know what children I'm talking about.”
”I should have expected you would not let that go.” She pulled out of his arms, spotted her undergarments, and crossed the room to collect them. ”I knew it was a mistake to mention them.” She pulled her chemise on over her head.
”Why was it a mistake?” His brows drew together. ”I rather like children, you know. I was a child once myself.”
”Once?”
He ignored her. ”You should have told me about them.”
”What? And keep you from the joy of solving the mystery yourself?” She continued to dress as he talked. ”I knew you would although I had thought you would be too distracted by that file business to turn your attention to this so quickly. How is that situation?”
”There is nothing new in regards to the file. And you are changing the subject.”
”But I do it so well.” She wrapped her corset around her midsection and turned her back to him to enable him to a.s.sist her. It struck her that it was the sort of thing a husband might do for a wife. ”Very well, then. Do tell me what you have discovered.”
He stepped closer and started tightening her laces. ”What I have learned is that some two years ago, around the time you allegedly left the department, which I am now seeing in an entirely different light, by the way.”
”Are you?” She bit back a smile.
”I am indeed.” He tugged at the laces. ”Upon reflection it now strikes me that, while I was prepared to convince you to leave the department to be at Evelyn's side should she need you, little persuasion was necessary. I had always thought you liked, no, reveled in this life of secrecy and danger and triumphs that are never made public.”
”It was great fun,” she murmured.
”Instead of objecting, if I recall correctly, you thought it was a grand idea. You said ...” He tugged again. ”It was time to have a more settled kind of life although, I must confess, I had never thought of you as the type of woman who wished for settled.”
”We all have our secrets, Max.”
”Apparently. As I was saying, that is, when you, for lack of a better word, inherited five small children, three girls and two boys. Now ranging in age from four to eight.”
She glanced at him over her shoulder. ”And do you know their names as well?”
”Of course I do,” he said, giving her laces one last tug, then tying them tight. ”Beth, Kate, Wills, Emily, and Daniel.” He finished with her laces, then wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. ”You do know I have four brothers and two sisters?”
She nodded.
”I have always wanted a large family.” He paused. ”Five seems an excellent place to start.”
”Do you know about their mother?”
”From what I have been able to discover ...” He paused and she braced herself. ”It seems she might have been your sister.”
”In many ways she was.” She pulled her thoughts together. She had never told this story, not even to Evelyn, never thought she would. Now she wondered if she had mentioned the children because she wanted this man to know. Perhaps it was a test of sorts. Of trust possibly. Or love. She drew a deep breath. ”When I was a child, after my mother died, I was pa.s.sed from one family to another. Some might have been relations, I really don't know.”
”I'm sorry.” Genuine sympathy sounded in his voice although she was sure he already knew this about her background.
”Don't be. It was far better than being on the streets. Often, it was no better than being a servant. But the last family I was with, they lived in a village an hour or so from London.” She rested her head back against his shoulder, and his arms tightened around her. ”They were very kind. They had three children of their own but that didn't stop them from taking in the rest of us. Altogether there were eleven children in that tiny cottage.” She smiled at the memory. ”There was little money but it was the happiest time of my life.
”Laura was their daughter and my age. We were very close, much like sisters, until I left to try my hand in the theater and she married.” She paused to collect her thoughts. ”They're all gone now. Her parents died, oh, some ten years past and her brothers were killed, one in Africa the other in India. Laura and I had lost contact with one another, but a little over two years ago, I received a letter from her through one of the theaters where I had once performed.
”I went to see her, of course. She was in a dreadful state.” Even now, the memory of the hovel where Laura and her children resided threatened to overwhelm her. ”Her husband had died a few months earlier. She was ill and knew she hadn't much time left. Days, as it turned out. Daniel was only two, Beth was six. She asked me to take care of her children when she died.”
”And you have,” he said quietly.
”In some ways it's the repayment of a debt but it's more than that.” She thought for a moment. ”I remember her parents once saying children should not be tossed away like so much rubbish. I would have been thrown away if not for them.” Her tone hardened. ”I could not let that happen to Laura's children.”
”So, now you lease a modest house in Chelsea with a small staff to care for the children. You spend all you earn on their support. And on those nights that you are not with me, you are with them.”
”You are clever, Max.” She twisted in his arms to face him.
”Clever enough to know what I want.”
”You only want marriage because you can't have it.” She pushed out of his arms and looked for her skirts.
”I can have it and I will.”
”Then you should find someone more acceptable to your family, your friends, your position.” She located her skirts and stepped into them.
”I don't want someone more acceptable, I want you.”
”What a way you have with words, Max,” she muttered, pulling up her skirts.
”b.l.o.o.d.y h.e.l.l, Celeste, I don't care what anyone else thinks. I want you and I want you as my wife.”
”Max-”
”I have been with no one but you, nor have I wanted anyone but you, for three years.” He glared. ”That alone should be evidence of my intentions.”