Part 108 (1/2)

”Excellent!” exclaimed the Hon. Tom Dashall, ”though I must confess you have travelled a long way for your ill.u.s.tration, which is quite sufficient to shew the utility of signs. But I would ask you if you can explain or point out the derivation of many we have in London--such for instance as 'The Pig and Tinder-Box'--'The Prad and Blower'--'The Bird and Baby'--'The Tyrant and Trembler'--'The Fist and Fragrance'”

”Hold,” cried Sparkle, ”I confess I am not quite so learned.”

”They are novel at least,” observed Tallyho, ”for I do not recollect to have met with any of them.”

”Ha, ha, ha!” exclaimed Tom, ”then you are not fly, and I must add something to your stock of knowledge after all. The Pig and Tinder-Box is no other than the Elephant and Castle--The Prad and Blower, the Horse and Trumpeter--The Bird and Baby, the Eagle and Child--The Tyrant and Trembler, the Lion and Lamb--The Fist and Fragrance, the Hand and Flowers. Then we have the Book, Bauble, and holler, which is intended to signify the Bible, Crown, and Cus.h.i.+on.”

At this moment a thundering knock at the door announced a visitor, and put an end to their conversation.

In a few minutes a letter was delivered to Dashall, which required an immediate answer: he broke the seal, and read as follows:--

”Dear Tom, ”Come to me immediately--no time to be lost--insulted and abused--determined to fight Bl.u.s.ter--You must be my second--I'll blow his bl.u.s.tering brains out at one pop, never fear. At home at 7, dine at half-past; don't fail to come: I will explain all over a cool bottle of claret--then I shall be calm, at present I am all fire and fury--don't fail to come--half-past seven to a moment on table. You and I alone--toe to toe, my boy--I'll finish him, and remain, as ever,

”Yours, sincerely,

”Lionel Laconic.”

~~402~~~ ”Here's a breeze,” said Tom; ”desire the messenger to say I shall attend at the appointed hour. Death and the devil, this defeats all previous arrangement; but Laconic is an old college friend, whom I dare not desert in a moment of emergency. I fear I shall not be able, under such circ.u.mstances, to leave town so early as was proposed.”

”Sorry for it,” replied Sparkle, ”and more sorry to be deprived of your company now our time is so short; however, I depart according to the time appointed.”

”And I,” said Tallyho, ”having no honorable business to detain me in town, intend to accompany you.”

”If that be the case,” said Tom, ”I may perhaps be almost obliged to delay a few days, in order to adjust this difference between Bl.u.s.ter and Laconic, and will follow at the earliest moment. It is, however, a duty we owe each other to render what a.s.sistance we can in such cases.” ”I thought,” continued Tallyho, ”you were no friend to duelling.”

”By no means,” was the reply; ”and that is the very reason why I think it necessary to delay my departure. I know them both, and may be able to bring matters to an amicable conclusion; for to tell you the truth, I don't think either of them particularly partial to the smell of powder; but of that I shall be able to inform you hereafter; for the present excuse me--I must prepare for the visit, while you prepare yourselves for your departure.”

Sparkle and Tallyho wished Tom a pleasant evening, took their dinner at the Bedford Coffee-house, and spent the evening at Covent-Garden Theatre, much to their satisfaction, though not without many antic.i.p.ations as to the result of their friend's interference between the two hot-headed duellists.

CHAPTER x.x.xI

”The music, and the wine, The garlands, the rose odours, and the flowers, The sparkling eyes, and flas.h.i.+ng ornaments, The white arms, and the raven hair--the braids And bracelets--swan-like bosoms, and the necklace, An India in itself, yet dazzling not the eye Like what it circled.

All the delusions of the gaudy scene, Its false and true enchantments--all which Swam before the giddy eyes.”

~~403~~~ Dashall being wholly occupied by the unexpected affair noticed in our last Chapter, had left his Cousin and friends to amuse themselves in the best way they could, prior to the completion of the necessary arrangements for quitting the metropolis. The party were undecided upon what object to fix their choice, or how to bend their course; and while warmly discussing the subject, were suddenly interrupted by the appearance of Gayfield, who learning that Dashall was from home, and upon what occasion, broke out with his usual volubility.

”Well, these affairs of honor certainly are imperious, and no doubt ought to take precedence of every thing else. My object in calling was chiefly to give him a description of the Countess of ------'s rout on Sat.u.r.day last, in Berkeley-square, where I intimated I should be, when I last fell in with him. '_Oh Cielo Empireo_.' I'm enchanted yet, positively enchanted! I ought to have Petrarch's pen to describe such a scene and such dresses. Then should a robe of Tulle vie with that of Laura at the church door--that dress of '_Vert pa.r.s.emee de violets_.'

But softly, let us begin with the beginning, _Belier mon ami_. What a galaxy of all the stars of fas.h.i.+on! It was a paradise of loveliness, fit for Mahomet. All the beauties of the Georgian aera were present. Those real graces, their Graces of A------ and R------ were among the number.

~~404~~~ The Countess of L------ and Lady F------ O------ would make one cry heresy when the poets limit us to a single Venus. And then the Lady P------'s. Heaven keep us heart-whole when such stars rain their soft influence upon us. As to the Countess of B------, with her diamond tiara, and eyes brighter than her diamonds, she looked so G.o.ddess-like, that I was tempted to turn heathenish and wors.h.i.+p. Indeed, that bright eyes should exert their brilliancy amid the dazzling brightness of our fair and elegant hostess's rooms, is no trifle. Dancing commenced at eleven; and, although my vanity allured me to think that the favorable glances of more than one would-be partner were directed towards me, I felt no inclination to sport a toe in the absence of Lady L. M.

By-the-by, Count C------ told me, with a profusion of foreign compliment, that I and the 'observed of all observers,' Lord E------h, were the best drest male personages at the rout.

Thanks to the magical operation of the Schneider, who makes or mars a man.

”The _coup d'oil_ of the scene was charming. _Cetoit un vrai delice_--that atmosphere of light, of fragrance, and of music--gratifying all the senses at once. Oh! what bosoms, arms, and necks were thronging round me! Phidias, had he attempted to copy them, would have forgotten his work to gaze and admire. Description fails in picturing the _tout ensemble_,--the dazzling chandeliers blazing like constellations--the richly draperied _meubles_--the magnificent dresses--and then so many eyes, like stars glittering round one; like 'Heaven,' as Ossian says, 'beaming with all its fires.'

”In the midst of my admiration, I was accosted by Caustic, and expressed my surprise at finding him in such a scene--'A rout,' he replied, 'is just one of those singular incoherences which supply me with laughter for a month. Was there ever such a tissue of inconsistencies a.s.sembled as in these pleasure hunts? On stepping from your carriage, you run the gauntlet through two lines of quizzing spectators, who make great eyes, as the French term it, at you, and some of whom look as if they took a fancy to your knee buckles. A double row of gaudy footmen receive you in the blazing hall, and make your name echo up the stairs, as you ascend, in a voice of thunder. Your _tete s'exalte_, and when you expect to be ushered into the Temple of Fame, you find yourself embedded (pardon the metaphor) in a _parterre_ of female beauty.'

~~405~~~ ”As for me,” I replied, interrupting the satirist, ”I delight in such things. I believe that fas.h.i.+on, like kings, can do no wrong.”