Part 99 (2/2)
1 Sir Felix had not heard of the following incident, else he certainly would have followed its example:--
Two ladies of distinction stopped in a carriage at a jeweller's near Charing-cross; one of them only got out, and the coach stood across the path-way which some gentlemen wanted to cross to the other side, and desired the coachman to move on a little; the fellow was surly, and refused; the gentlemen remonstrated, but in vain. During the altercation, the lady came to the shop door, and foolishly ordered the coachman not to stir from his place. On this, one of the gentlemen opened the coach-door, and with boots and spurs stepped through the carriage. He was followed by his companions, to the extreme discomposure of the lady within, as well as the lady without. To complete the jest, a party of sailors coming up, observed, that, ”If this was a thoroughfare, they had as much right to it as the gemmen;”
and accordingly scrambled through the carriage.
The poor street-sweeper having applied to Sir Felix for a mite of benevolence,--”And is it for letting the carriage block up the cross-way, and forcing me through the mud,” asked the Baronet;--” but whether or not, I have not got any halfpence about me, so that I must pay you when I come again.”--”Ah! your honour,” exclaimed the man, ”it is unknown the credit I give in this way.” Sir Felix thrust his hand into his pocket, and rewarded the applicant with a tester.
~~327~~~ Proceeding along Piccadilly, our party were followed by a Newfoundland dog, which circ.u.mstance attracted the notice of the Baronet, to whom more than to either of his a.s.sociates the animal seemed to attach itself. Pleased with its attention, Sir Felix caressed it, and when the triumvirate entered a neighbouring coffee-house, the dog was permitted to accompany them. Scarcely had the three friends seated themselves, when a man of decent appearance came into the room, and, without ceremony, accused the Baronet of having, by surrept.i.tious means, obtained possession of his property; in other words, of having inveigled away his dog; and demanding instant rest.i.tution.
Sir Felix fired at the accusation, divested as it was of the shadow of truth, yet unsuspicious of design, would have instantly relinquished his canine acquaintance, but for the interposition of Dashall, who suspected this intrusive personage to be neither more nor less than a dog-stealer, of whom there are many in London continually on the alert for booty.
These fellows pick up all stray dogs, carry them home, and detain them until such time as they are advertised, and a commensurate reward is offered by the respective owners. If, then, the dog is intrinsically of no value, and consequently unsaleable, the adept in this species of depredation, finding he can do no better, takes the dog home, receives the promised reward, and generally an additional gratuity in compensation of keep and trouble; but, should it so happen, that the proffered remuneration is not equivalent to the worth of the animal, the conscientious professor of knavery carries his goods to a more lucrative market. At the instance of Dashall, therefore, Sir Felix was determined to retain the animal until the claimant brought irrefragable proof of owners.h.i.+p. The fellow bl.u.s.tered,--the Baronet was immovable in his resolution;--when the other threw off all disguise, and exhibiting himself in pristine blackguardism, inundated Sir Felix with a torrent of abuse; who disdaining any minor notice of his scurrility, seized the fellow, with one hand by the cape of his coat, with the other by the waistband of his breeches, and bearing him to the door, as he would any other noxious animal, fairly pitched him head foremost into the street, to the manifest surprise and dismay of the pa.s.sengers, to whom he told a ”pitiable tale,” when one of the crowd p.r.o.nounced him to be a notorious dog-stealer, and the fellow, immediately on this recognition, made a precipitate retreat. ~~328~~~ ”I am glad,” said Dashall to his friends, who had witnessed the result of this affair from one of the windows of the coffee-room, ”that our canine acquaintance (patting the animal at the same time) is now clearly exonerated from any partic.i.p.ation of knavery. I had my suspicions that he was a well-disciplined a.s.sociate in iniquity, taught to follow any person whom his pretended owner might point at, as a fit object of prey.”
The Baronet and the Squire, particularly the latter, had heard much of the ”Frauds of London,” but neither of them was aware that metropolitan roguery was carried on and accelerated through the medium of canine agency.
In confirmation of this fact, however, Dashall mentioned two circ.u.mstances, both of which had occurred within these few years back, the one of a man who, in different parts of the suburbs, used to secrete himself behind a hedge, and when a lady came in view, his dog would go forth to rob her; the reticule was the object of plunder, which the dog seldom failed to get possession of, when he would instantly carry the spoil to his master. The other case was that of a person who had trained his dog to depredations in Whitechapel-market. This sly thief would reconnoitre the butcher's stalls, particularly on a Sat.u.r.day night amidst the hurry of business, and carry off whatever piece of meat was most conveniently tangible, and take it home with all possible caution and celerity. We have heard of their answering questions, playing cards, and casting accompts,--in fact, their instinctive sagacity has frequently the appearance of reasoning faculties; they even now are competent to extraordinary performances, and what further wonders the ingenuity of man may teach them to accomplish, remains hereafter to be ascertained.{1}
1 The following anecdote is particularly ill.u.s.trative of canine sagacity. It shews that the dog is sensible of unmerited injury, and will revenge it accordingly; it exhibits the dog also, as a reflective animal, and proves that, though he has not the gift of speech, he is yet endowed with the power of making himself understood by his own species. Some years ago, the traveller of a mercantile house in London, journeying into Cornwall, was followed by his favourite dog, to Exeter; where the traveller left him, in charge of the landlord of the Inn, until his return. The animal was placed in an inner yard, which, for sometime back, had been in the sole occupation of the house-dog; and the latter, considering the new comer an intruder, did not fail to give the poor stranger many biting taunts accordingly. Deserted, scorned, insulted and ill-treated, the poor animal availed himself of the first opportunity, and escaped. The landlord scoured the country in quest of the fugitive, without effect. After the lapse of a few days, the traveller's dog returned to the Inn, accompanied by two others, and the triumvirate entering the yard, proceeded to execute summary vengeance on the house-dog, and drove him howling from his territories. The two dogs were from London,--
”Their locket letter'd braw-bra.s.s collars, Shew'd they were gentlemen and scholars.”
Hence it appears, that the traveller's dog went to London, told his grievance to his two friends, and brought them to Exeter to avenge his cause!
~~329~~~ Emerging from the coffee-house, companied by their newly acquired canine friend, our observers proceeded along Piccadilly, when reaching its extremity, and turning into the Park by Const.i.tution-hill, they were met by the servant, Thady.
”Your honour,” said the valet, ”haven't I been after soaking you, here and there, and every where, and no where at all, at all, vrid this letter, bad luck to it, becays of the trouble it may give you; and indeed I was sent after your honour by Miss Macgilligan;--there's ill luck at home, your honour.”
”Then I shall not make any haste,” said Sir Felix, ”to meet such a guest.”
He then read aloud the ominous epistle:--
”My dear Nephew.--A vexatious affair has occurred.--I shall be glad to see you, as soon as possible.--J. M.”
”Perhaps you can oblige us with the history,” said the Baronet, ”of this same 'vexatious affair;' but observe me, let it be an abridgement,--Miss Macgilligan will favour us with it in detail.”
”Why then, your honour,” said the valet, ”you had not gone out many minutes, when there came a _rit-tat_ to the door, and a gintail good-looking gentleman inquired for Mr. A----a. Begging your pardon, says I, if it is my master vou mane, he does not belong to the family of the Misters at all; his name is Sir Felix O'Grady, of the province of Munster, Baronet, and I am his valet; long life and good luck to both of us!”
~~330~~~ ”This is rather a tedious commencement,” observed Sir Felix to his marvelling a.s.sociates,--”but I believe we must let the fellow tell the story in his own way.--Well, Tliady, what next?”
”So, your Honour, he inquired whether he could spaak wid you, and I told him that it was rather doubtful, becays you were not at home; but, says I, Miss Judy Macgilligan, his Honour's reverend aunt, is now in her dressing-room, and no doubt will be proud in the honour of your acquaintance.”
”My 'reverend aunt' certainly ought to feel herself very much obliged to you.--Well, Sir!”
”And so, your Honour, the maid went for instructions, and Miss Macgilligan desired that the gentleman should be shewn into the drawing-room, until she could make her appearance. Well, then, after waiting some little time, he rings the bell, with the a.s.surance of a man of quality, just as if he had been at home. So up stairs I goes, and meets him in the hall. 'Pray,' says he, 'have the goodness to present my best respects to the lady; I will not obtrude upon her at present, but shall call again tomorrow,' and away he walked; and that's all, your Honour.” ”That's all! What am I to understand then by the 'vexatious affair' my aunt speaks of?”
”O,” exclaimed Thady, recollecting himself,--”may be she manes her gold watch, which the gentleman discovered in the drawing-room, and carried away in his pocket, by mistake!”
”Very well, Sir,” said the Baronet; ”now that we have orne to the finis, you may go home.”
It is evident the gentleman had availed himself of the Baronet's absence from home, and that the information derived from the communicative valet encouraged the hope of success which he so adroitly realized.
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