Part 22 (1/2)
* See Lord of Scoundrels by Loretta Chase, published by Avon Books.
Promises.
Lisa Kleypas.
To Kirsten with love- the best maid of honor ever!
1.
England.
January, 1820.
”You're thinking about Chance again,” came Elizabeth's exasperated voice. ”You're letting the memory of that scoundrel ruin every opportunity of making a good match! It's time to forget him and consider your future.”
Lidian Acland turned with a smile and looked into the face so similar to her own. Her mother, Lady Elizabeth Acland, was still beautiful at forty-five, although the loss of her husband a few years before had left an indelible trace of sadness in her soft brown eyes.
”I've thought about my future very carefully,” Lidian replied calmly. ”I intend to wait for Chance to come back to me, no matter how long it takes.”
Elizabeth sighed. ”Ever since Chance left a year ago, I've seen you standing alone at b.a.l.l.s like this one, acting like a wallflower when you should be dancing and laughing with other young men.”
”I don't want any of them.” Lidian reached out to her mother and touched her arm placatingly.
”I don't understand your stubbornness,” Elizabeth said softly. ”I've always known you so well, Lidian, and this isn't like you.” They had always been close, especially in the four years since Lidian's father, John, had died of a weak heart. They even looked alike, both of them small and dark-haired, with sherry-brown eyes. They shared the same temperament, practical and sensible. But I'm not exactly the same as you, Mama, Lidian thought silently. Even Elizabeth didn't understand the romantic core that harbored the hope, pain, and broken dreams left by Chance Spencer.
Standing together the two women watched the familiar scene before them: couples moving in a sprightly country quadrille, polite young men approaching blus.h.i.+ng girls, dowagers and chaperons keeping a watchful eye on their charges. Once Lidian had taken part in the festivities, making eyes at handsome rakes, flirting, waltzing...she had loved to dance until her skirts had whirled around her ankles. And then she had met Chance, and her heart had been lost for good. He was the only man she had ever wanted.
”Mama,” she murmured, ”you must accept that I know what is best for me.”
”But you've been buried in the country for most of your life. How can you know what is best? You're making decisions now that will affect the rest of your life. Every young man you turn away might be the one who could make you truly happy.”
”I could never be happy marrying a man I didn't love.”
”There are other things just as important as love. Kindness, affection, security...all the things I had with your father. Pa.s.sion and romance fade, but friends.h.i.+p wears quite well over a lifetime.”
”I'll have all of that when Chance returns.”
”I'd like him to return,” Elizabeth replied darkly, ”so I could tell him what I think of him.” She smiled as she spoke, so that it appeared to the other guests at the Torringtons' ball that they were having a light conversation. ”Leaving you dangling by your heartstrings for years while he gallivants around the continent-”
”Mama, please...we've had this conversation a hundred times before.”
Elizabeth reached for her hand and squeezed it. ”You know I'm speaking out of concern for you, darling. I don't think you really believe Chance will come back. But you're too stubborn to admit it, even to yourself. You're afraid of being hurt again, and you've decided not to trust any man because Chance Spencer played you false. And it's all my fault that you gave your heart to a scoundrel like him.”
”Your fault?” Lidian repeated in surprise.
”Yes. Ever since John died, I've depended on you to help me manage the estate and tenants. When the other girls were dancing and flirting, you sacrificed your best years, sitting behind piles of account ledgers, trying to squeeze s.h.i.+llings from our budget in order to make ends meet-”
”I wanted to help you.” Lidian slid an arm around her mother's waist. ”If you and I had lost the estate, I would never have forgiven myself. And we've managed very well, I think.”
”Perhaps,” Elizabeth said, looking troubled. ”Unfortunately, you're more naive than most girls your age, Lidian. Forgive me for saying it, but it's true. You have such high ideals...you've been sheltered from experiences that might have made you more worldly-wise. Chance saw that, and he took advantage of you. What I don't understand is why you insist on remaining loyal to him.”
Having no easy answer to that, Lidian sighed and glanced around the room. The ball was being hosted by the Torringtons in honor of their daughter's seventeenth birthday. Word had been spread that there would be a bountiful supply of bachelors in attendance, and so excited parents from all over Berks.h.i.+re and its surrounding counties had brought their daughters. However, the Honorable Chauncey Spencer wasn't there, and as far as Lidian was concerned, he was the only man she would ever want.
Was it only a year ago that Chance had courted her so ardently, so tenderly? He had won her heart, and then he had left her. He wanted to experience more of life, he had said. Before he committed himself to the responsibilities of marriage, a wife, and children, he wanted to go on a tour of the continent-but then he would come back to her. He had asked her to understand, and Lidian had pretended that she did. He had asked her to wait for him, and she had agreed. She had been too unsure of herself, too dazzled by him, to protest.
Perhaps her mother was right. Lidian couldn't let herself believe that Chance would never return for her. The problem was, she couldn't seem to forget him, or to go on with her life. No other man had his wicked charm...no one else held any interest for her.
”Look over there, Lidian,” came her mother's voice. ”Do you see the tall gentleman by the door?”
Lidian focused on the stranger, a man in his twenties. Only an avid sportsman would have such an athletic build and sun-bronzed skin. His tawny golden hair had been neatly brushed, but it was already falling over his forehead, above a pair of bright, heavily lashed eyes. Very handsome indeed...but he lacked the dark allure of Chance Spencer. He stood with his hand at the waist of a young blond girl, guiding her protectively through the crowd.
”Who is he?” Lidian asked idly.
”I'm certain he is Lord Eric De Gray. I haven't seen him for years-but he's the exact image of his father, Edgar! And the girl with him must be his sister Dorothy.” Noticing that her daughter's gaze had fixed on the stranger, Elizabeth warmed to the subject. ”I was closely acquainted with the De Grays while your father was still alive. We've gone our separate ways since then, but I still hold them in great affection. Their eldest child Edward died not long ago in a riding accident...a great pity. But my, how Eric has matured! I must find a way to introduce you-”
”Mama, no,” Lidian said firmly. ”I have no interest in meeting anyone. I agreed to attend the ball only because you insisted on it.”
”But darling-”
Shaking her head, Lidian glided away to the refreshment table, keeping to an un.o.btrusive path along the side of the room.
Lord Eric De Gray kept an arm around his sister Dollie as he guided her through the crowd, deftly fielding greetings and eager questions. They made their way toward the refreshment table, through a sea of smiling faces. He ignored all of them, indifferent to the glances cast in his direction.
”My goodness, Eric,” his sister exclaimed breathlessly, ”I had no idea you were so sought-after. I just heard one woman say that you are the catch of the season!”
”I wonder why,” he said cynically, although they both knew. The family had just been showered with t.i.tles that had once belonged to them decades ago. The t.i.tles-and a great deal of property-had been revoked when a De Gray ancestor had been accused of treason in the English civil war. Now that it had recently been proven by a respected historian that the accused man had been innocent, Parliament had granted the De Grays a full rest.i.tution of all that had been taken from them.
In the past year they had gone from being poorly landed to considerably wealthy, and reactions from everyone had been the same. The desire to marry a De Gray was at a fever pitch. If his older brother Edward were still alive, Eric would have been free to continue with a relatively normal life. But Edward had died two years ago, and now Eric was the oldest surviving son, first in line to inherit his father's t.i.tle. It meant nothing to him. He would have given anything to have his brother back. All the status and attention should have been Edward's...and he would have handled it with his usual steady wisdom. Instead, Eric was left to a.s.sume a position of influence he had never expected or wanted.
Mothers who once dreaded that Eric might take an interest in their daughters now frantically tried to attract his interest in them. Young ladies who had rebuffed him were now all too ready to flirt and bat their lashes at him and agree to anything he wanted. Once he would have been flattered by their attention, but now he took a cynical pleasure in their ardent pursuit. He was determined not to court any of them. He wanted someone who would overlook the De Grays' newfound wealth and see only him, and he wanted the same for Dollie. To protect his sister from fortune-seekers, Eric accompanied her to b.a.l.l.s and soirees and social engagements. He kept a watchful eye on her, lending his protection and advice whenever she required them.
”Now you can marry any woman you want,” Dollie remarked.
”I have no desire to marry,” Eric said. ”Not for a long time.”
Three young men besieged Dollie, causing her to blush to the roots of her pale blond hair. Eagerly they vied for her notice, procuring gla.s.ses of punch and plates of tidbits for her to enjoy. As Eric pulled at the edge of his cravat, which seemed to be cutting into his throat, he caught a glimpse of a girl making her way toward the refreshments. He stared at her, his attention suddenly absorbed.
Her black hair was pulled back in a smooth sweep, away from skin that seemed impossibly pure and polished. Her figure was slim, with half-bared shoulders that gleamed enticingly in the light of the chandeliers. It was a pity she wore such a vacuous look, her face as lifeless as a mask. Pretty as she was, no man would approach a girl who seemed so utterly disinterested in the scene around her. He had met women like her before, beautiful sh.e.l.ls with nothing inside. But this one was so striking, with her porcelain skin and glowing dark hair, that he didn't want to believe she was like the others.
”De Gray!” came the voice of his old friend George Seaforth. A short man with cropped red curls and abundant freckles, George had attended school with him when they were boys. Following the path of Eric's gaze, George saw the dark-haired girl and shook his head. ”That's Miss Lidian Acland,” he said. ”Daughter of the late Sir John Acland. Don't waste your time with her, De Gray.”
”Why not?”