Part 18 (1/2)

Dana nodded, seeming to appreciate the suggestion. ”Yes, perhaps. It would explain why they've stayed in town.”

”But what would they achieve by doing this?”

”Maybe power. Perhaps they have a way of harnessing the darkness for themselves.”

Something occurred to me. ”Did Flynn take me to the pools for a reason? Did he want to check if they had a reaction to me?”

”I don't know. Did he?”

I thought of the reaction the pools had. They definitely responded, though I didn't think it was to me, and as far as I was aware, neither did Flynn. Besides, when I'd gone later with Riley, even considering what we'd been there to do, they'd not reacted in the same way. Something else had been responsible.

I couldn't worry about that now.

”Let me go back to the carnival, see what I can find out.”

”One of us should go with you.”

So you can keep an eye on me, I thought. ”No, it's too dangerous. It's easier for me to go unseen, and my friend won't talk to me unless I'm alone.”

Dana exchanged a glance with Laurel.

”I trust her,” Laurel said, giving an apologetic shrug.

I could have hugged her.

”Okay, fine. Go alone,” said Dana. ”Meet us back here in two hours. The Convergence is almost upon us, and time is running out.”

Chapter.

20.

I found Riley riding his bike inside the huge metal cage I'd seen him in the first night I'd come to the carnival. I stood back and watched him for a while, appreciating the air of danger combined with skill that his performance displayed.

I'd sneaked in the back route Riley had shown me, avoiding the midway and the people milling around. Riley had told me the carny folk were night owls, but there seemed to be more activity tonight than I'd seen since the place had been shut down. The air was filled with the clang of metal on metal, of the roar of machinery being used, of men shouting instructions to one another. I didn't like it. They were up to something.

Riley rode one final, dizzying loop and brought the bike to a skidding halt at the bottom of the cage. He must have sensed me standing there, hiding beside one of the trailers, for he turned and looked directly at me. I lifted a hand to wave, but he didn't respond, not even with a smile.

My heart sank. What now?

He opened the door in the cage and climbed out, dragging his bike with him. He left his bike beside the cage and ran over to me with a slow, easy lollop. ”Icy, what are you doing here?”

”I need to talk to you.”

”Yeah, I need to talk to you, too.” He grabbed my hand. ”Come with me.”

”Where are we going?”

”To my trailer. There's a lot of people around tonight. It's too easy for you to be seen.”

I looked again toward the midway, where people worked on the rides, uns.c.r.e.w.i.n.g bolts and taking things apart. ”What's going on, Riley?”

”Just come with me.”

He led me to his trailer, drawing me inside its now familiar warmth and atmosphere. But instead of pulling me into his arms, as I had hoped, he stood in front of me, his arms folded across his chest, his lips pressed together, a line between his deep blue eyes.

”What is it, Riley? You're scaring me.”

”We got the okay from the police department that no foul play was involved in the accident on the Waltzer. We're allowed to move on.”

The ground s.h.i.+fted under my feet, dropping away, together with my stomach, leaving me weak and empty. My head spun. ”You're leaving?”

”We missed the slot for our next pitch a couple of towns along, so we don't have anywhere to go until tomorrow night, but yeah, we're leaving.”

”You're leaving?” I repeated, unable to make the words feel true. My voice sounded tiny, disbelieving, even to my own ears. ”No, you can't leave me. Not now.”

”I'm sorry, Icy. You must have realized I'd move on at some point. The carnival is my home. These are my people.”

No, I wanted to cry. I'm your people now.

But I couldn't get the words to come out.

”How could you?” I said instead. ”How could you be with me, knowing you were going to leave?” My heart was surely breaking, fracturing into tiny pieces. I felt it would shatter through me, slicing me into so many parts no one would ever be able to put me back together again. How stupid I had been. Of course he was always going to leave me.

”Baby, please ...” He reached out to me.

I slapped his hand away. ”Don't baby' me.”

”I'll stay in touch. I'll call you. I'll come back and visit when I can.”

I shook my head, staring at his face and wondering how something so beautiful could cause so much pain. Tears built inside me, swelling like a balloon inside my chest, rising to create a painful lump in my throat and making the backs of my eyes burn. ”It won't be the same.”

He stepped toward me, moving into my personal s.p.a.ce, his arms slipping around my waist. He pulled me to him, and I couldn't resist. Though I was furious at him, I was also hurt, and he was the only one who could make the hurt go away. I pressed my face against his chest, the familiar sensation of leather against my skin. I inhaled the scent of him, the warmth of his body heating my cheek, trying to commit the moment to memory. I didn't know how many more times I'd be able to do this.

Riley pressed his nose and mouth against the top of my head, kissing my hair. ”I don't want to leave you.” His breath heated my scalp.

I moved away from him slightly so I could look into his face. ”So don't. Stay here, with me.”

He gave a laugh, but it didn't contain any humor. ”What, in your dorm room? That's hardly going to go down well.”

”I could hide you under the bed.”