Volume Iv Part 28 (1/2)

Love calls me hence; a favorite cow Expects me near yon barley-mow; And when a lady's in the case, You know, all other things give place.

To leave you thus might seem unkind; But see, the Goat is just behind.”

The Goat remarked her pulse was high, Her languid head, her heavy eye; ”My back,” says he, ”may do you harm; The Sheep's at hand, and wool is warm.”

The Sheep was feeble, and complained His sides a load of wool sustained: Said he was slow, confessed his fears, For hounds eat sheep as well as Hares.

She now the trotting Calf addressed, To save from death a friend distressed.

”Shall I,” says he, ”of tender age, In this important care engage?

Older and abler pa.s.sed you by; How strong are those, how weak am I!

Should I presume to bear you hence, Those friends of mine may take offence.

Excuse me, then. You know my heart; But dearest friends, alas! must part.

How shall we all lament! Adieu!

For see, the hounds are just in view.”

John Gay [1685-1732]

THE SYCOPHANTIC FOX AND THE GULLIBLE RAVEN

A raven sat upon a tree, And not a word he spoke, for His beak contained a piece of Brie, Or, maybe, it was Roquefort?

We'll make it any kind you please-- At all events, it was a cheese.

Beneath the tree's umbrageous limb A hungry fox sat smiling; He saw the raven watching him, And spoke in words beguiling: ”J'admire,” said he, ”ton beau plumage,”

(The which was simply persiflage).

Two things there are, no doubt you know, To which a fox is used,-- A rooster that is bound to crow, A crow that's bound to roost, And whichsoever he espies He tells the most unblus.h.i.+ng lies.

”Sweet fowl,” he said, ”I understand You're more than merely natty: I hear you sing to beat the band And Adelina Patti.

Pray render with your liquid tongue A bit from 'Gotterdammerung.'”

This subtle speech was aimed to please The crow, and it succeeded: He thought no bird in all the trees Could sing as well as he did.

In flattery completely doused, He gave the ”Jewel Song” from ”Faust.”

But gravitation's law, of course, As Isaac Newton showed it, Exerted on the cheese its force, And elsewhere soon bestowed it.

In fact, there is no need to tell What happened when to earth it fell.

I blush to add that when the bird Took in the situation, He said one brief, emphatic word, Unfit for publication.

The fox was greatly startled, but He only sighed and answered ”Tut!”

The moral is: A fox is bound To be a shameless sinner.

And also: When the cheese comes round You know it's after dinner.

But (what is only known to few) The fox is after dinner, too.

Guy Wetmore Carryl [1873-1904]

THE FRIEND OF HUMANITY AND THE KNIFE-GRINDER Friend Of Humanity

Needy knife-grinder! whither are you going?