Part 5 (1/2)
”La Villa Rosa. I told him to pick a place and he said they have good Italian food there. I'll be too anxious to eat much anyway so it doesn't matter where we go.”
I browsed the menu online to prepare for the date. I wanted to have a game plan ready so I could order something that wouldn't ruin my diet. Cheesy pastas, steaks in heavy sauces, and fried fish dishes contained enough calories to surpa.s.s my calorie goals for the week. I'd have to order the grilled chicken with vegetables or a salad with fat-free dressing to avoid overindulging.
”Don't be nervous, it's only a date,” Brittany told me. ”Try not to be uptight, and have fun.”
If only it was that simple.
”They have a wine list. Do you want to order a bottle?”
I drummed my fingers on the table and tried to remember how many calories were in a gla.s.s of wine. If I was correct, I believed white wine had fewer calories than red wine. At my lengthy pause, Cameron had begun staring at me. This had become my life, disappearing into my head in an obsessive quest to be thin.
”Any type of white wine would be good. I don't know much about wine, so you can pick a type,” I said.
”I'm typically a beer drinker, so I'm clueless about wine. We'll ask the waiter to recommend something,” he said, setting down the wine list.
”You should never do that; he'll swindle you into ordering the most expensive bottle.”
”You're probably right,” he acknowledged and his lips upturned into a seductive smile.
I took the opportunity to study him. For the date, he had dressed in a light green dress s.h.i.+rt, tailored perfectly to accentuate his broad shoulders and chest. His gray dress pants were neatly pressed and belted around his narrow waist.
The restaurant was upscale, the atmosphere romantic. The lighting was low, and soft piano music played in the background. Cameron was going to great lengths to impress me, which was unnecessary, since I was already infatuated.
When it was time to order, I chose a salad with hearts of palm and artichokes, seasoned with lemon juice. Before Cameron ordered, he frowned my way. ”Are you going to order anything else? I think that's a starter salad.”
As the waiter and Cameron stared at me, my palms began to sweat. I felt smothered by the questions and opinions everyone seemed to have lately about my eating habits. ”Umm, I'll also have the vodka rigatoni with chicken.”
It was a horrible choice. The prosciutto and the heavy whipping cream gave the dish an astronomical amount of calories. However, throwing up my food for two months had taught me what type of meals would come up easier than others. Creamy foods and desserts weren't as likely to become lodged in my throat and produce a coughing fit.
”What are you thinking about?” Cameron asked me when the waiter left.
”Hmmm?”
”You sometimes get this faraway look on your face. It makes it difficult to read you.” He paused. ”I wouldn't mind having a peek inside your head to figure out what you're thinking.”
What an appalling thought. I couldn't stand to be inside my own head, no less wish my thoughts on anyone else. ”I'm thinking about how much I don't want to go home for the weekend.”
”Why?”
”I miss my sister,” I insisted, ”but my mother is a lot to handle. She's a critical person and has only gotten worse since my father pa.s.sed away. Usually when I'm home, she spends our time together lecturing me about how I'm disappointing her.”
”She sounds intense.”
”She'll scare you away when you meet her.” I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand. ”I'm sorry, that was presumptuous. I mean, we've only hung out a couple of times, I wasn't trying to suggest we're serious enough to meet each other's parents-”
He interrupted my rambling. ”Kayla, it's okay.” He sucked on his lower lip, momentarily allowing me to forget my embarra.s.sment, instead fantasizing about his kiss. ”I like you, Kayla-a lot. If anything, I'm worried I've been coming on too strong. You seem a little skittish when you're around me, and I wonder if it's because I'm making you nervous.”
I wasn't uncomfortable around him; I was terrified of being with him. Cameron created a yearning inside of me, a need to be in his arms and forget about the outside world. My heart was too fragile to hand over to someone who could easily crush it.
”You're not coming on too strong,” I said softly. ”I like you too.”
”Good, because I've wanted to ask you out since I first saw you walking toward me in the Student Center.”
I could hear the smile in his voice as he talked about our first meeting.
He laughed. ”I was in the middle of talking to another student when I saw you. I think he was p.i.s.sed when I cut him off mid-sentence to stop you.”
I tilted my head to the side. ”Why?”
”What do you mean?”
”What was it about me that you liked?”
It wasn't the most polite question, and it gave him a peek into my insecurities, but I was desperate to know. Cameron could have any girl he wanted-what was it about me he found appealing?
He laughed uncomfortably. ”Kayla, are you messing with me? Or are you seriously that modest?”
My eyebrows lifted quizzically.
He continued, ”As soon as I saw you walk out of the bookstore, I couldn't tear my eyes away from you. You're gorgeous, but in such an una.s.suming way, like you have no idea of the effect you have on men.”
”Now, are you the one messing with me?”
He shook his head insistently. ”Maybe it's because you're shy and you don't notice it, but I swore I was going to get into a fistfight at the bar when I saw all those guys ogling you.”
I wanted to believe him, I did, but my self-image was warped to the point where I pondered whether I should avoid my reflection altogether. The best tactic was to change the subject. ”Thanks for wanting to defend my honor.”
”Anytime.” He grinned. ”I want to be the only guy allowed to ogle you.”
My spine straightened and my pulse picked up. It was too late to protect myself from Cameron-he was unraveling my defenses and forcing his way into my guarded heart.
Chapter Ten.
”Miss, are you alright? Should I get someone for you?” The female voice sounded elderly and called through the bathroom stall.
”I'm fine,” I croaked.
I had waited for the bathroom to clear before I stuck my finger down my throat, but someone had walked in while I was throwing up. As quiet as I tried to be while getting rid of my dinner, the noise had been loud enough to alert the other person using the bathroom.
It took five minutes before the woman finished going about her business and exited the bathroom. Emerging from the stall, I cringed at my sight in the mirror. I was flushed and my eyes were tearing up. Dampening a paper towel with cold water, I used it to pat down my neck and face. I concealed the redness with the powder from a compact I brought and reapplied my red lipstick. After popping a mint in my mouth, I ventured back into the restaurant.
”I was starting to worry about you,” Cameron remarked when I returned to the table. Leaving your date for fifteen minutes while you vomited up dinner wasn't the best way to make a good impression, I thought as he knitted his eyebrows together.