Chapter 45 – Deterring Investigation (1/2)

I lay there in the closet, bound and gagged, alone to my thoughts.

(So, I really did it.)

I searched through my feelings, trying to figure out how I felt about it all, and most all I could find was a bit of satisfaction. There wasn't much grief, no regret. No, there was some regret. I hadn't found anything about the kid that they kidnapped, and now I couldn't even ask about it.

Even though it probably happened before I had arrived at the orphanage, I regretted that I hadn't had the foresight to at least get some clues before killing off those three.

There was also one last feeling bubbling up from deep within: hunger. The scent of blood permeated even this closed off closet, and while it wasn't particularly high quality blood, it did stimulate my appetite.

I could only hope that while I bore with it, my stomach wouldn't rumble at a bad time.

Aside from that, I was just bored.

Most of the little fluffballs had entered the closet and were floating around lazily. I could feel a few outside wandering around aimlessly. Unfortunately, I wasn't really in a position to entertain them, but it felt like they could at least read the atmosphere that much, and didn't insist on it.

To think that in the end I felt so little after killing people. I felt a little bad for doing it, but not some sort of crippling anxiety over it. I couldn't tell if it was because it was in my nature, if it was something inherent when it came to being a vampire, or if I'd been conditioned to care little about death after coming to this world,.

I really hoped it was the last one. As terrible as such a thought was, it was way better than the other two. And there was enough evidence that it couldn't be denied. I had spent every day since I was born in this world killing to survive. Even if I had never thought much of the things I had killed, it was still killing. Many of them weren't any different from killing bugs on Earth to me, and anything that felt more than that was like breaking robots or something. Challenges to overcome rather than ending lives.

If that was the case, then it wasn't an inherent part of this world nor my race.

(No, in a sense that's an inherent part of this world, but just not one that everyone experiences.)

But if it wasn't an inherent part of my race, then it cut down the chances that all other vampires were hostile to the major nations of this world. But in the end, I could only hope that I wasn't too much of an anomaly in that regard.

Since there wasn't much I could conclude on my own, I could only shelve this thought and move on. I did need to be careful to not lower the value of sentient life in my mind though, as now that I understood how little resistance I had to killing, I was extremely prone to falling down this slippery slope.

Moving on, I needed to think about what else I needed to do to avoid suspicion. So far, I had physically hidden and restrained myself. To any casual observer, it should seem like I was forcibly bound and put out of sight by some outside assailant. It was my hope that even under basic scrutiny that the facade would hold up.

In addition, the transformation I had put my body under should make it significantly harder, if not almost impossible, for someone to connect me to my true identity.

But that alone wouldn't be enough. I had only made the first impression that would keep me from being suspect. Suspicion couldn't be put onto me until I was well out of sight and no longer discoverable for further questioning.

For that, I needed to confirm my cover story. If I was playing the innocent bystander who was in the same room when the murder happened, I needed to be able to provide a basic witness account, otherwise I'd be suspect as there were witnesses of me entering the building.

But it wasn't like I needed anything more than some shady person entered though the front door and after killing the lecher who brought me to his home, ran away by climbing out of the window after binding me and hiding me in the closet.

Even a description of the killer could be done on the fly as long as it was reasonably consistent.

Since I most likely wouldn't have much to worry on that end, I was again brought about with boredom.

As I lay there in the darkness on my side, my mind drifted.

In the end, even if it was for self defence and to protect the orphanage, I did kill three people. What would people think if they found out? Rather what would the orphans think? Philia? Alicia?

The people...they can't find out. I'd be screwed if they did. The orphans' reactions were hard to predict. Many of them were too young to have solidified their morals, and would be heavily influenced by their affection of me. Philia...she probably wouldn't approve, but at the same time I thought she would understand as well.

(Alicia. What would she think?)

Like the orphans, she was hard to predict on this front despite living together for a year. On one hand she was young and impressionable like the orphans, yet her opinion of me was much more solidified and she was likely more able to objectively judge my actions.

(At least I'd like to think she could.)

Maybe it was just wishful thinking, but sometimes Alicia seemed much more mature than her age suggested. At least it felt like it to me.

Thinking back, Alicia was much stronger than I was when confronted over her death. She managed it with dignity I couldn't as she grew weaker day by day. In the end I was a mess, desperately trying to find a way to save her while she quietly accepted her fate.

Even in the end, she wanted to use what was left of her to support me. Despite only experienced a fraction as much life as I had, Alicia was able to do things I couldn't see myself being even close to being capable of.

As the images of her last moments played through my mind, I was overwhelmed with the feeling of my chest being crushed as tears freely overflowed from my eyes.

I missed her so much. I so desperately wanted to hear her voice, to feel her touch. To see her smile once again.

Laying there in the darkness, I quietly wept.

The sound of a flat echo brought me out of my gloom.

The dull reverberations were faint, but distinct, and repeated at a constant rate. It was the sound of feet against carpet through the walls.

Stretching out my senses, I felt the presence of someone approaching slowly. There didn't seem to be any urgency, so whoever it was wasn't aware something was amiss yet.

But as they approached, they paused for a moment then grew quick and loud before stopping entirely nearby. There was a few knocks, then the sound of a door opening.

”My Lord!”

A few more hurried footsteps before stopping entirely.

”My god, how could this have happened?”

”Mmmph!”

Judging the timing to be as good as it could be, I yelled out through my gag and lightly hit my feet against the bottom of the closet.

”Wha?!”

After a moment, I was suddenly blinded as the closet was opened.

”My god! You! Are you alright?”

An elderly man in a well creased black suit cradled my head in his arm and pulled the scarf out of my mouth.

”He...I...the lord...!”

I quickly stammered out, doing my best to sound unsettled.

”Shhh, shhh, it's safe now. Nobody is going to hurt you miss. Allow me to remove these bindings.”

The old man lay me back down and started to fiddle with the shackles. It took him several minutes before I was freed, despite the shackles only being held together with a pair of large pins. I might need to review the design if I ever had to wear such a thing ever again. Then again, his hands were shaking pretty bad, so that might have had something to do with it.

”I apologize for the delay. I am Vanir, the head butler of the house Koree. May I hear your name?”

”Ah, umm...I'm Luna.”

I hadn't considered my name to be asked. I could only hope he would accept such an impromptu name.

”Luna is it? I know it to be difficult, but may I presume you bore witness to what had happened my lord?”

Nodding, I gave him my fabricated story.

”When, when the lord asked, demanded me...as he was pushing me towards the bed I heard...a man, a big, tall man come through the door. When I turned, he was already behind the lord, and I saw pain, fear on his face as the tall man standing behind him. He was wearing a white cloak, and a hood. I couldn't see his face but. But he whispered something into the lord's ear before laying him on the ground. There was a knife, or something, in his back. Then the man, he turned to me. I tried to run, but he, he grabbed me, then gagged and shackled me. I was put into that closet. I, I heard, I don't know. Something strange. But after, it sounded like he opened the window, then there was the sound of some scratching. I didn't hear anything after that.”

I stuttered horribly as I desperately tried to put together that story. The lack of planning and rehearsing really showed, but in turn I hoped that it sounded more authentic than being able to smoothly give my story like I was reading off of a script.

”I see. I suppose you were brought here at my lord's request?”

I nodded.

”How unusual. He much prefers humans over foxkins to warm his bed.”

(Shit.)

”I, umm, I normally cover myself. This, this is what I was wearing when I brought here by his guards.”

To reinforce my point, I quickly picked up the bundle of discarded cloth near the closet and unravelled it, revealing my robes and bag. To prove my point, I quickly put on and buttoned up my robes and showed off how I looked while hugging my white rabbit plush.

As an added touch, I tucked my tail between my legs and flattened my ears on top of my head.

”Ah, yes, I see. Forgive me for suggesting anything untoward you.”

”Umm, no. It's fine.”

”The sun had already crested the horizon. I am sure you would much prefer to rest and recover from your ordeal in a familiar place. Allow me to escort you.”

The old man waved his other hand towards the door before making his way out. I couldn't help but stare at him for a moment before I got the clue and followed him. My cheeks felt a little warm. It was like I was being treated like a lady or something.

(Or rather, I am a woman, so in a sense this is only proper?)

It seemed like this was the first time I felt the positive side of being a woman in a public setting. All my time with Alicia was entirely private, and with the orphans I wasn't treated like a woman, just an adult. Philia was the closest, but with the way she treated me wasn't particularly feel distinct between a man or woman.

This old man made me feel like I was specifically treated as a woman, and it kinda made me a little happy. Like I could be a little proud of what I was. It was a far cry from how that lecher or the thugs treated me like an object.

(Well, aside from that perfume store shopkeeper, though he just treated me more like a customer than a woman.)

While I felt like I was losing more and more of my previous self, I had to admit, I enjoyed the feeling.

”Allow me to escort you all the way to your abode.”

Right as we were reaching the front gates, the old butler turned around and gave me that terrible announcement.

”Ah, no. You must be busy. I can't.”