Part 27 (2/2)
The expression amused him. ”Well, why in heaven's name shouldn't High Jinks buy a trumpery, gee-gaw parasol?”
”I do wish you wouldn't call her High Jinks. Because she can't afford a trumpery, gee-gaw parasol.”
He spoke bemusedly. No need for caution that he could see. ”Well, I don't know--I rather like to see them going out in a bit of finery.”
Mabel sniffed. ”Well, your taste! Servants look really nice in their caps and ap.r.o.ns and their black, if they only knew it. In their bit of finery, as you call it, they look too awful for words.”
Signs of flying up. He roused himself to avert it. ”Oh, rather. I agree.
What I meant was I think it's rather nice to see them decking themselves out when they get away from their work. Rather pathetic.”
”Pathetic!”
She had flown up!
He said quickly, ”No, but look here, Mabel, wait a bit. I ought to have explained. What I mean is they have a pretty rotten time, all that cla.s.s. When High Jinks puts up a trumpery, gee-gaw parasol, she's human.
That's pathetic, only being human once a week and alternate Sundays. And when you get a life that finds pleasure in a trumpery, gee-gaw parasol, well that's more pathetic still. See?”
Real anxiety in his ”See?” But the thing was done. ”No. I absolutely don't. Pathetic! You really are quite impossible to get on with. I've given up even trying to understand your ideas. Pathetic!” She gave her sudden laugh.
”Oh, well,” said Sabre.
Deeper foundered!
II
And precisely the same word--pathetic--came up between them in the matter of Miss Bypa.s.s. Miss Bypa.s.s was companion to Mrs. Boom Bagshaw, the mother of Mr. Boom Bagshaw. Mabel hated Miss Bypa.s.s because Miss Bypa.s.s was, she said, the rudest creature she ever met. And ”of course”
Sabre took the opposite view--the ridiculous and maddening view--that her abominably rude manner was not rude but pathetic.
The occasion was an afternoon call paid at the vicarage. Of all houses in the Garden Home Sabre most dreaded and feared the vicarage. He paid this call, with shuddering, in pursuance of his endeavour to do with Mabel things that gave her pleasure. (And in the most uncongenial of them, as this call at the vicarage, he used to think, characteristically, ”After all, I haven't got the decency to do what she's specially asked--give up the bike ride.”)
The Vicarage drawing-room was huge, handsomely furnished, much adorned with signed portraits of royal and otherwise celebrated persons, and densely crowded with devoted paris.h.i.+oners. Among them the Reverend Boom Bagshaw moved sulkily to and fro; amidst them, on a species of raised throne, Mrs. Boom Bagshaw gave impressive audience. The mother of the Reverend Boom Bagshaw was a ma.s.sive and formidable woman who seemed to be swaddled in several hundred garments of heavy crepe and stiff satin.
She bore a distinct resemblance to Queen Victoria; but there was stuff in her and upon her to make several Queen Victorias. About the room, but chiefly, as Sabre thought, under his feet, fussed her six very small dogs. There were called Fee, Fo and Fum, which were brown toy Poms; and Tee, To, Tum, which were black toy Poms, and the six were the especial care and duty of Miss Bypa.s.s. Every day Miss Bypa.s.s, who was tall and pale and ugly, was to be seen striding about Penny Green and the Garden Home in process of exercising the dogs; the dogs, for their part, shrilling their importance and decorating the pavements in accordance with the engaging habits of their lovable characteristics. In the drawing-room Miss Bypa.s.s occupied herself in stooping about after the six, extracting bread and b.u.t.ter from their mouths--they were not allowed to eat bread and b.u.t.ter--and raising them for the adoring inspection of visitors unable at the moment either to adore Mr. Boom Bagshaw or to prostrate themselves before the throne of Queen Victoria Boom Bagshaw.
Few spoke to Miss Bypa.s.s. Those who did were answered in the curiously defiant manner which was her habit and which was called by Mabel abominably rude, and by Sabre pathetic. As he and Mabel were taking their leave, he had Miss Bypa.s.s in momentary conversation, Mabel standing by.
”Hullo, Miss Bypa.s.s. Haven't managed to see you in all this crowd.
How're things with you?”
”I'm perfectly well, thank you.”
”Been reading anything lately? I saw you coming out of the library the other day with a stack of books.”
Miss Bypa.s.s gave the impression of bracing herself, as though against suspected attack. ”Yes, and they were for my own reading, thank you. I suppose you thought they were for Mrs. Boom Bagshaw.”
Certainly her manner was extraordinarily hostile. Sabre took no notice.
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