Part 15 (2/2)
”Run away with me, Adel, and we'll really love.”
”Can I put it in?”
”You love me, Adel?”
He wanted her here, now, even this way, imperfectly. That was how much he loved her.
In the Quran, even virgin love begets children.
”Can I put it in?”
”You can put it in.”
”Nisrine, I love you so much, I can feel your soft soul all around me, it's like being covered in the most beautiful flower.”
Afterwards, he leaned against the wall of the roof, and she leaned on the railing, sweaty and heated.
The worry had come back to her face, so he complimented her to distract her.
”There's a donkey here who thinks you're so pretty, he could write a poem.”
”Is there?”
”Yes. Do you know him?”
”Yes.”
”What do you think of him?”
”He's a donkey.” But she said it sweetly, and they laughed and laughed.
He opened his arms to her. ”I love you so much, honey, don't ever leave me, my heart's breaking.”
They had once played a game where she was in trouble, and they thought up all the ways he could save her.
”Flying!”
”With a fire hose!”
”With wings!”
Now, she said about his broken heart, ”Don't say that!”
”But it's true.”
Silence. She said, ”Bea thinks we're like Qais and Leila.”
Leila had left, and Qais had done nothing.
He held out his hand.
”See me shaking? That's not weakness, Nisrine. I shake because I love.”
THAT NIGHT, I helped Nisrine put Dounia to bed, and our rituals seemed very sweet because we had almost lost them. Nisrine took Dounia's hands, I took her feet to swing her, in fun.
We peeked through the curtains into crocheted shadows of streetlights.
Nisrine said, ”Bea, I have a problem.”
I knew this. I could tell by the way she held herself, and Madame held herself, that in our house, there was a problem. I had felt this problem coming for some time, but I was still trying not to have the knowledge. I tried to live in the sweet moment.
”I don't know how to stay here. Mama no longer wants me.”
”It will get better.”
She had a contract and a child, and her father's honor: We only work where we are wanted. In a strange country, what are we without our honor?
”You've been trying, you just have to try harder.”
But, I could see a faraway look in her eyes.
Nisrine said, ”Do you think if I went to a new house, I could still see you and Dounia and Adel?” I did not think so, I did not like the idea of a new house.
Of course, Nisrine didn't think so either. She sighed, looked at me worried that she might leave, and for a moment, we felt all the differences between us. I had grown up in a world in which, when things got bad enough, you could leave, you had that choice; in which I expected challenges, not hards.h.i.+p.
Nisrine had seen each member of her family live a full life, yet still work jobs they would not have chosen, like she worked in a job she would not have chosen. I had chosen to be here. For a moment, this fact alone threatened to overwhelm us.
Then, she smiled. ”Don't worry, Bea. I can't leave unless they let me.”
Which was not completely true, but it relieved me. She said, ”But my honor.”
Once, a long time ago, Nisrine had taken my hand and put it over hers, to feel her heart. Now, I took Nisrine's hand and put it over mine, over my chest. She knew what I was doing. She felt for its beat.
”My, Bea, it's a strong one! Who's your lover?” Joking.
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