Part 17 (1/2)

A moment later Malene returns and whispers to Iben: Anne-Lise has talked with Erik Prins about me.

About you?

That woman is f.u.c.king unbelievable.

I overheard some of your conversation.

Thought you might.

Erik Prins is a small man with a potbelly and oddly s.h.i.+ny skin. His clothes look as if hes had them for decades. He is probably in his late thirties, but people think of him as much older.

For years Erik has been working on a huge tome about Scandinavian foreign policy after the Second World War. n.o.body knows how his years of writing have been financed possibly a grant or, more likely, some kind of state benefit. No one has wanted to know enough to ask.

Erik often comes to the Center to read or look for new books. When he has been sitting in the large meeting room they usually need to air it afterward. He likes to eat while he reads, and his dull food parcels always carry a powerful smell of liver sausage and damp rye bread. Even so, Malene has always singled Erik out among the users of the Center and gives him the best possible support. She often finds time for a chat as well. They talk about this and that, including Eriks old cla.s.smate from his time as a history student, Frederik Thorsteinsson.

Paul has told them that, on several occasions, the DCIG board has noted Eriks praise of the Centers excellent service. Without fail, Frederik pa.s.ses Eriks opinions on to the board, and his p.r.o.nouncements have come to be regarded as practically infallible. The members are highly educated researchers, experts in their fields, who feel that the shabby little man speaks for Everyman and is a perfect representative of the Centers typical user.

Iben smiles, but she is concerned. I must say, Ive never heard of anyone who hasnt been happy with your work. And Erik, of all people! That spoiled little man!

She doesnt give a d.a.m.n if Anne-Lise can hear what shes saying, but she lowers her voice slightly to keep Paul out of it.

Maybe he complimented Anne-Lise. You know, like you do when you first collaborate with somebody new oiling the wheels, kind of thing. h.e.l.l have told her something like shes very good at her job and he wishes he had known about her before.

Ibens eyes s.h.i.+ft away uneasily, just for a second. Then she continues: Thats the kind of thing a person would say. He couldve said it to you. Or to me, or anybody.

Malene leans back in her chair with a weary sigh. True. Everyone says things like that, just to be friendly. Its too bad that Anne-Lise takes it all so seriously.

But later on, when Malene and Iben get together in the copier room, Malene brings up the subject again. Iben realizes this will take some time and sits down on the table. The copier thumps on and on, copying, sorting, and stapling a large selection of newspaper cuttings that Camilla should have gotten ready for circulation to the board today. Now Iben has taken on the job.

Malene paces restlessly up and down. Ive been thinking about what Anne-Lise said. How come she says that Ive tried to exclude her? She obviously believes it. Maybe she has cross-examined Erik about it.

Iben tucks her hands under her thighs. Or it could be a bit of everything? He thought that hed better be kind and she responded by questioning him.

Yes, and he felt pressured to say something about me and theyve ended up discussing me in detail. We mustnt forget that now he depends on her, more than on anyone else here. Being on good terms with her is more important for Erik than getting on with me now. Its Anne-Lise who can give him special treats.

Yep. Now what?

Iben, this is important. If she goes on gossiping behind my back, she might turn lots of people against me. Like Frederik. And Ole. Anyone.

She could.

Yes. So I must find out.

Today Paul joins them for lunch. The atmosphere is tense, although n.o.body mentions Erik Prins or the conversation in the library. Earlier, Malene went down to the supermarket to get fresh rolls. She asked if she could get anything for anyone else. Anne-Lise handed her the money to buy a portion of carpaccio, the kind that comes with olive oil and grated Parmesan. Now she says that everyone must have some, but apart from Paul no one does.

After a while Iben cannot bear the silence, which is broken only by terse exchanges; she decides to tell them about the book she has been reading into the small hours of the morning. Grith lent it to her the other day.

Its about split personalities. Its a fact that nine out of ten patients are women. And almost all of them have been subjected to violence or other abuse in childhood. The author puts it quite plainly: A split personality is a little girl imagining that the abuse is directed toward another person. Which is why at least one of the personalities is often still a little girl.

Griths book is called Dissociative Ident.i.ty Disorder: Diagnosis, Clinical Features, and Treatment of Multiple Personality. Maybe this isnt an ideal subject for discussion right now, but Iben tries to speak without hinting at any of the office subtexts.

Its very hard for anyone to know if she has DID a split ident.i.ty, that is. As your normal self, you cant recall having had a bad childhood. Many patients forget altogether and might even remember the man who abused them as a good person.

The others stay focused on their food and dont respond to what she is telling them. They do seem interested, though, so Iben carries on.

The best indication is that you cant remember what youve done for a period of time, or you feel youve been behaving out of character. But its not cut and dried. A survey of people with no psychological problems showed that about seventy-five percent of the subjects have had moments when they easily did something that they used to think was difficult. More than fifty percent said that after driving a car for a long time, there were whole stretches of the journey they couldnt remember. And one out of every ten said theyd found themselves wearing clothes they couldnt remember putting on.

Suddenly Malene laughs, just as she is about to bite into her cheese sandwich.

Iben, youre such a geek! Come on, what next? A blow-by-blow account of someones thesis on postcolonial literature?

Iben stops rattling off the study results.

After the break, Iben senses that Malene again has something to say, for her ears only. The two of them wait for the others to leave the room. Ole, the board chairman, phones and wants to speak to Paul, who hurries off. Anne-Lise does not leave and makes a show of settling down with the daily paper.

Malene and Iben give up and wander back to their desks. While she was out shopping, Malene had called Erik Prins.

He swore that under no circ.u.mstances would he have said anything about not being pleased with my work. It seems that Anne-Lise was fis.h.i.+ng for something she could use against me. At least, thats the impression Erik got.

Malene has been composed throughout the lunch break. Now she is sputtering with anger. Im going to ask Paul to see me. Theres no way I can put up with the way Anne-Lise keeps undermining my standing with the users. I have to work with them every day. Shes going around looking for chances to bad-mouth me. Its so disloyal and unprofessional, trying to stab me in the back like that. She leans forward. Paul must understand that weve stood by that woman for long enough. And its likely that shes the e-mailer. The idea that its Camillas ex-boyfriend is just stupid!

Anne-Lise walks by and Iben and Malene fall silent. With Anne-Lise back in the library they must finish their talk elsewhere.

The coffee thermos is full and they have already spent a long time in the copier room, which means that they have just about used up any legitimate excuse. Thats too bad, though. What they were talking about cant wait.

In the kitchen the rickety dishwasher is churning and the smell of the detergent mixes with the ever-present smell of coffee. The air is hot and damp from the steam that escapes from the whirling hot water. Side by side, they perch on the edge of the kitchen table.

Malene puts a hand to her forehead. Then she asks Iben to come along to the talk with Paul. You know he always takes what you say seriously.

What about Camilla? Wouldnt it be better to wait until all three of us are here so we can see him together?

Yes, I suppose so. Of course itd be best. Malene looks vaguely at the dull day beyond the steamy windowpane. Its just Im not sure. You know as well as I do that if Paul puts pressure on Camilla sh.e.l.l probably back down. The two of us are stronger when we act alone especially if she comes along and then, halfway through, starts to agree with Paul.

Iben knows this is true and nods.

Malene looks sad. I feel that Ive tried everything to get on better with Anne-Lise. But today Ive had to face the fact that Ive failed.

Iben rubs her thumb against the tabletop. She doesnt say anything and Malene carries on.

The only thing we can do is regroup and move on.

Iben looks up from the table and meets Malenes eyes. What about waiting for a few days? You know, to let things cool off a little.

chapter 19.

the cafe is darker than Ibens usual haunts. As far as she can guess, it is a place where journalists, technicians, and musicians hang out, most of them after working in Broadcasting House just opposite.