Part 120 (2/2)
”Plato,” I said, more to myself than to Antony
His broent up in surprise ”My little Alexandrian,” he said fondly ”Perhaps you'd like to declaim?”
”No,” I said ”What I have learned in life would not help leaned frouests, listening to their conversations Remarkably, there was no mention of Octavian or the political situation Instead the talk was all of fashi+ons, food, entertainments, and excursions
Finally Antony strode to the front of the chaoing all the way back to that first winter I came to Alexandria--welco? Remember the visits to Canopus? Reo--how can that be? Now it is tiether First I will auction off soold I have placed in the bowls for you, to bid on them if you wish”
He flicked his hand over toward the objects I had noticed earlier, and a servant held the first one up
”What aedy? You ht well have need of them in the days to come, when you play a part
”What araced the hall of Marcus titius This will help you recognize hi speciold chamber pot? Its fame has spread as far as Rome It has other uses as wellperhaps for flowers?”
I had never seen such a thing in my life He must have commissioned it especially for the auction!
He conducted the rest of the auction briskly, finally saying, ”And thus do I bid my former life farewell”
He s of their instruer appeared beside the in a hushed, sweet voice that caused the co and strain to hear ”Follow thy heart's desire while still thou rearment be of finest linen, anointed with the true raceful hand, barely lifting a fold of her sheer linen gown I could see all the fingers through it
”Do that which is pleasing to thee more than thou didst aforetime; let not thy heart be weary Follow thy heart's desire and that which is well pleasing in thine eyes Arrange thine affairs on earth after the will of thy heart”
Now her voice was plain to hear in the quiet of the cha obtains not the heart of a rave On! live out a joyful day; rest not therein Lo! it hath not been granted to s Lo! there is none who hath gone hence and returned hither” Those wordsI had heard theo
”Thank you,” said Antony He turned to the coo we had a brotherhood, a society, we called it Amimetobioi, the Incomparable Livers Now I propose we form another, suitable for today, and call it the Incomparable Livers Now I propose we form another, suitable for today, and call it Syriapothanouether Yes Let those ill join hands with us, and ill seal the pact by dancing once around the chamber to the sound of the harp A dance of death And Hades will lead us” We Who Will Die Together Yes Let those ill join hands with us, and ill seal the pact by dancing once around the chamber to the sound of the harp A dance of death And Hades will lead us”
The actor appeared at Antony's side, and extended his gloved hand He spoke no word
The stunned guests just stared at him, and then, to my astonishment, the first man stepped forward and took my hand Another followed him, until al around all the walls
”Now!” Antony signaled to the harpists, who began playing softly, and the line of dancerstheir heads The flowers on their heads treh solemnity made a funeral procession
Then one of the women took off her bracelets and held thele livened the parade; others turned their jewelry into cymbals, clappers, and bells The pace speeded up, until ere running, our feet thue had turned raucous Life burst defiantly through theout his hand for a quick servant to press a cup in it
”More here!” yelled another, and finally the line fell apart, as panting people grabbed cups of wine
”And now the food!” cried Antony, and at his word a tea couches and tables Superbly well rehearsed, theyroom for over a hundred people in an instant
People dived and flopped onto the couches, squealing with glee Before they were served, Antony spoke again
”Feast well! The best of Alexandria is here for your pleasure Eat, drink, play, co as we still have, ill gather to do thus And let us not grieve at what is to come, but remember the epitaph of an Epicurean: 'I was not, I was, I am not, I do not care' Thus are suh on its way to eternity”
After he took his place near me, I leaned over and said, ”That is too cynical”
He was chewing vigorously on a fig ”Why, do you think otherwise?”
”Yes,” I said ”What you quoted was ignoble It sounds like a beast of the field”
He made a wry face ”I envy them”
”No, you don't They have no ate cup and bring it to me When it arrived, I turned it around in ed to ht” He had e
”Sir, how do you like this” 'Why dost thou not retire like a guest sated with the banquet of life, and with calm mind embrace, thou fool, a rest that knows no care?' Is that what our club is about?”
Antony clapped his shoulder ”Yes, ae But that it wasof his true state of mind He was theatrical to the e behind costuedy and co in reserve
Fro their philosophies, seeing who had the greatest co Alexandrian I sipped ate cup and said little The delicacies of orchard, sea, and field passed my palate unnoticed
Hades ate heartily; he was quite robust for a shade
Late that night, preparing for bed, I heaped my jewelry in a pile by my forest of perfu I pulled off the wilted crown of flowers and placed it alongside
”You outdid yourself,” I finally said to Antony ”I must say, I could never have predicted any of it” Because it was so bizarre, I added to ed, but then, they had joined in with gusto Perhaps they were all deranged It was said that in the last days, people in a group could behave very strangely
But I did not feel a part of that confusion and despair That ht end, and be ended by me, I accepted But it was a political fact, not a philosophical one I would not glorify a political necessity by trapping it in all sorts of nonsense
I had no innate wish to die, I was not eager to die; I would far prefer to live, unless it was incompatible with honor--mine or my country's Death, like life, should serve a purpose
”What are you thinking?” Antony asked quietly He was already lying down, his arhts”
I was thinking I am not in love with death, as you are I looked down at him He looked oddly happy, as if he had crossed soht I looked down at him He looked oddly happy, as if he had crossed so to reht put ht it to mind I sat down beside hi; it sayeth: ”The earth is bright, where isto me' ”
He looked puzzled I had to think hard to recall the lost words, once known so well, of the rest of it
”Thenit wentlet's see ” I willed the words to return, and they obeyed ” 'But I, I found my beloved on his couch My heart is rejoiced above all measure, and each of us sayeth: ”I will not part from thee” ' ”
I felt for his hand and found it ” ' ”My hand is in thy hand I walk and am with thee in each beautiful place, thou rieved my heart” ' ”
It was true I leaned over and kissed hi,” he said quietly
”No,” I admitted ”We are still too hed ”You are banishi+ng it, I fear” He reached his arms up to embrace me ”Do you really feel that way about me?”