Part 95 (1/2)
Late that night, the guests gone, the rose petals led, the silk banners tattered and torn frohtenede since been sent to bed, even Caesarion, and we stood surveying the mess, our aret it,” he said ”Such a day comes but once in everyone's lifetime”
”Thanks be to Isis!” I did not think I could live through another one
”I think the honors ell received,” he said cautiously
”Here, yes How Octavian will receive them is another matter”
”The east is mine to dispose of hoill Ro Caesarion the true heir of Caesar,” I said ”It is nothing less than a declaration of war That was your intention?”
”I--it is not necessarily so,” he said ”But it is true, and et it”
”Why did you not warn me of this? Or did you only do it on impulse?” It seemed to me that every important action of his life had been undertaken on a whi toher away; now this Things that decided his fate, chosen offhandedly
”No It was not an i to do It is is true” He was stubbornly going to keep repeating that ”Surely I haven't displeased you? Isn't it time someone finally took up Caesarion's cause? It seems that is the last duty I can render my fallen chief” He looked so dedicated, so deter that ”Surely I haven't displeased you? Isn't it time someone finally took up Caesarion's cause? It seems that is the last duty I can render my fallen chief” He looked so dedicated, so determined
”No, of course I am not displeased” I would just have liked to be consulted
”Co on my arm ”Everyone has received honors today but you Did you think you were forgotten?”
”I already have so iven?” Not that I woulda present of Herod's entire country to ht We will sleep there”
Arm in arm we traversed the corridors of the palace A brisk eeping through the s and porticoes, as if to bear away the stale odors of the riotous banquet A number of Ro the steps and floors
Antony's quarters were on the other side of the palace, overlooking the open sea and away fro the ocean, and I knew he also needed a retreat from the rest of the palace, as if he had a private residence This had met the requirements very nicely
”Enter” Antony twisted open the doors and ushered me in, as if he werehere He had furnished the rooms with tables, chairs, and chests from his estates in Ro been in his fa time, but perhaps it made hiardless of his affinity for life here One would have expected him to have created a showcase of oriental luxury, with mother-of-pearl screens, brocaded cushi+ons, pillowed couches, beaded curtains Instead he lived in Republican propriety He was a co rooe scroll lay on a table, another piece of paper under it A single laift must be suited to the person,” he said quietly ”I know ood fortune to be able to find theive them to you--nay, to lay the on one knee, indeed placed it at my feet
I felt embarrassed ”There is no need for this,” I said But he re
”It is myself I lay at your feet But you know that; you have known it for a long time These are just tokens” He picked up the scroll and handed it to iving aamon!” I said ” ”The entire library?”
”Yes, all two hundred thousand volumes,” he said ”They are to be transported here immediately”
”The finest in the world, outside of Alexandria ” I was dazed ”And noill have it all!”
”I knoarehouse of books was destroyed in the fire on the docks when Caesar was here,” he said ”I hope this can ant, like all his gestures It took the breath aith its daring and generosity ”II thank you,” I finally said The Pergamon library, in its entirety!
”That was for your head,” he said, rising and taking up the second piece of paper What else could there be? ”This is for your heart--or your eyes” He handed it toa wilted bouquet of wildflowers
It was a drawing of Hercules, beautifully executed, based on the famous statue by Myron
”I kno you love sculpture, the capturing of the human form in bronze or stone, so that it remains forever held in its perfection This, after all, is over four hundred years old--but his s are not weak”
Yes, only art could preserve youth and strength Perhaps that is e treasure it so Already I was older than the Venus statue in Ro it now?
”I thank you,” I said How cherished heto fill them
”It should arrive within forty days,” he said
I looked at the paper ”But--” I already held it
”This is not the gift!” He laughed ”No, the gift is the statue itself The original By Myron”
”What? But it is in the Teed ”I told you everything lies within ift I had it removed”
He had robbed the te packed now, and--”
I threwhim off his feet ”You are a ht here! ”Oh, a rabbed his head and pulled hio down his neck and enificent wide shoulders Even the Myron statue could not have better shoulders
His arerness that being held next to hi time since we had embraced privately We were so surrounded by people, so hemmed in by duties and official schedules, as well as our children, that ere seldom alone Since he had returned fro, or public appearance or obligation after another
”Now, ift of all Privacy, and time”
The quiet, e toNo Iras or Charmian or Mardian Even Eros was nowhere to be seen
”Come” He ledof Cato's We stood in theour arhs, shoulders I rejoiced in the very feel of his body, in everything about it There was not a single thing I would change Marble ht be eternal, but perishable flesh arm
His mouth on mine tasted better than all the delicacies of the banquet His lips were a feast, and I drew out every morsel of pleasure from them But unlike food, the more I took, the more I wanted
I felt that I must possess hith But how? Simple possession is all very well for scrolls and statues, but for another person--how can we fully possess that? We have an instant in love e feel we have achieved it, but it is not achievableand so we fall away, separate and still wanting
We fell on the bed, as hard as a camp bed set up in a common soldier's tent Was it thus to remind him of who he was? We pulled at one another's clothes, as fevered as any simple infantryuarding his shoulders--as it so sturdy, so tight? His sandals had been flung on the floor, and his strong bare legs twined about one also, and ly
I kissed the scars on his ar over to kiss his back where there were stillthe scar that marked the bad cut Olyain now, that had almost been lost I felt myself close to tears
”O dear Gods, it has been so long ” I heard his faint words, spoken one at last, and er between us The delicious feel of flesh against flesh spread warht of his body, the ainst me I rejoiced in it; he was still a lion, his power not spent, regardless of what his enemies hinted
”I swear, by all the Gods,” he ht beside my ear, ” ”this is all I want, in all the world”
I could not think of anything else; the world had perished for me I only wanted him--only him, to be possessed by me To be part of me