Volume Ii Part 24 (1/2)
At a theater party, when there are several men and women in the party, the men may take advantage of the intermission to leave their places for a few moments. But they must not indulge in this privilege more than once during a performance, if they wish to be polite and considerate to the ladies. And they should not go without excusing themselves to the ladies whom they are escorting.
When a young man and woman are together, it is the height of ill-breeding for him to leave her alone during intermission. If he wishes water or candy or programs, the usher will attend to it for him.
He must not leave the lady alone unless she requests him to get something for her. A gentleman alone may, of course, come and go as he pleases during intermission.
If one must walk past strangers to leave one's seat for intermission, or if one wishes to leave before the performance is over, a courteous apology must be made to the people who are disturbed. ”I beg your pardon,” or, ”May I trouble you to pa.s.s?” are the forms most frequently used. When the aisle is reached, it is polite to acknowledge the obligation by smiling and saying, ”Thank you.”
[Ill.u.s.tration:
Photo by George H. Davis, Jr. Courtesy of the _Woman's Home Companion_.
THE BUFFET LUNCH
The informality of the buffet lunch permits the use of paper napkins but the hostess may use linen ones if she prefers]
During intermission it is permissible to step across the aisle or into another box to greet a friend. Often introductions are made, but they are not formal and need not gain future recognition. As soon as the curtain begins to rise, the caller must return to his own place.
LEAVING THE THEATER
If you wish your acquaintances to recognize your charm and cultivation, you should conduct yourself at the conclusion of the performance with the same quiet dignity that you observed when you entered the theater and while you were waiting for it to begin. Speak in low tones, smile but do not laugh, discuss the play but do it in so quiet a manner that no one but your companion will hear you. It is bad form to gather in small groups and discuss the play in loud tones. Leave the theater as quickly as possible. The attendants are waiting to close it.
It usually takes a long time for a large theater to be emptied because many inconsiderate people block the aisles and loiter at the rear of the auditorium. As soon as the curtain has fallen for the last time, gather your wraps together, slip them on if it is convenient and move quickly down the aisle to the rear. Then pa.s.s quickly out of the theater and out of the way. But if you still carry your wraps, you may either go to the dressing-room or remain a moment or two in the lobby until you have arranged them.
Shakespeare said, ”All the world's a stage.” If this is true, do we not owe the stage the same courtesy, respect and honor that we owe the world of fellow-men? Be as well-mannered and courteous at the theater and opera as you would in the most fastidious drawing-room.
CHAPTER VI
HOTEL ETIQUETTE
AT THE HOTEL
There is a very distinct code of ethics by which the lady and gentleman must be governed when stopping at a hotel. It is a mistaken idea that one may act as one pleases, merely because the hotel is public. But it is as important to remember one's social obligations as it is in the home of a friend.
Indeed, the hotel is one place where men and women are most likely to make embarra.s.sing blunders and commit humiliating mistakes. This is especially true of the man or woman from a small town who stops for a day or two at a big hotel in the city. Only by knowing thoroughly the laws of good conduct, as adapted to hotel life, can one expect to move smoothly and with ease through its often puzzling social intricacies.
At home, or even when visiting at a friend's home, a boor may remain undetected. But how quickly the truth appears after he has registered at a hotel! There are numerous little tests of good breeding that betray him; the servants themselves soon discover whether or not he is cultivated, well-bred. And they invariably treat him accordingly.
The definite rules will be given in the following paragraphs. But for one's general conduct it should be remembered solely that the hospitality of a hotel is no less worthy of courtesy and consideration than the hospitality extended by a friend.
THE WOMAN GUEST
To-day women stop at hotels much more frequently than they did a decade ago. The war brought with it a widened horizon for the women of America, and they travel all over the country on political, professional and business enterprises as well as for pleasure. It is, consequently, necessary for them to stop often at hotels; thus they must know exactly how to conduct themselves.
Some hotels, in smaller towns, have ladies' entrances. The woman visitor should first ascertain whether or not there are such entrances, and if so should govern her actions accordingly. But in large cities, hotels generally have but one large entrance where the woman may enter without embarra.s.sment. Business often takes the modern woman into strange towns, and there is no reason why she should feel the least hesitancy in stopping at a hotel--providing she knows how to conduct herself.
Hand baggage should be relinquished at the door to attendants of the hotel. The woman should make her way immediately to the desk-clerk, register, and then follow the page a.s.signed to her, to her room. It is not good form to loiter in the lobby before going to one's room after one has registered. A wise plan is to call the hotel on the telephone beforehand, requesting them to reserve a room or suite of rooms as the case may be. This will eliminate any possibility of having to leave the hotel because there is no room. It is always a wise plan for a woman to reserve a room in advance, especially if she is to arrive late at night since certain hostelries refuse to admit women after a certain hour.