Part 16 (1/2)

”i- thanks,” he said, looking distinctly uncomfortable his gaze darted around the porch, to the ground, the sky-anywhere but at her. ”i hope i can still see her. you know, when you guys move.”

”sure. she'll love it: '

”and i think you should talk to her about sam.”

”travis, i know what's best for mandy.”

”you don't have to tell her about the bigamy, just let her talk about being without him. glenwood is a small town. we don't have a lot of single parents around here. mandy probably feels different from everyone else she knows.”

”i hadn't thought of that,” she admitted. ”it makes sense. i'll talk to her.” she drew in a deep breath. she should have seen that on her own. ”see, you're not the only one who questions about parenting skills.” would she ever get it right? first she messed up completely by believing sam. now she was concerned about making a mistake with mandy. when would the second-guessing end?

”you're going to make yourself crazy,” he said, taking her in his arms and pulling her toward him. ”stop worrying everything is going to be fine.”

”but-”

”no” buts,”

” he said, covering her mouth with his finger”that's enough thinking for tonight. i don't want you to tax your brain with anything more complex than how wonderful this feels.”

he lowered his mouth to hers. she told herself she should stop him. they couldn't do this again. but it felt too good. too right. his lips were hot against hers. his arms felt strong and safe as he enfolded her against his broadness.

he s.h.i.+fted, pulling her onto hisqlap. of their own accord, her arms reached around his neck. one of his hands slipped up from her thigh to her waist, then to her breast. he touched her curves, stroked the puckering nipple. elizabeth gasped her pleasure and knew that she was seconds from losing control.

she pulled her mouth away from his drugging kisses, away from the pleasure and escape he promised.

”i can't,” she whispered, fighting the tightness in her throat and the screams of protest from her aroused body.”

”please don't make me do this again.”

”darlin', no one's going to make you do anything: ' she risked looking up at him. he wasn't smiling, but he didn't look angry. ”i didn't mean it like that. oh, travis, you are wonderful and there's nothing i'd like better than to make love with you tonight.”

”but?”

”but i don't want to fall in love with you or care about you more than i do. if we make love again, i won't be able to be just friends.” she pulled free of his gentle embrace and stepped onto the porch. it was tearing her up inside to leave him, but she knew she had to. for both their sakes.

”i'm doing you a favor,” she said, looking down at him, hoping that wasn't hurt she was seeing in his eyes. ”after all, aren't you the one claiming you don't want to make another mistake? aren't you the one who doesn't want to get involved again?”

chapter twelve.

the question hadn't left him alone in two days. elizabeth was right-he had told her he didn't want to get involved again. it went against everything he believed. trying for a long-term relations.h.i.+p was a sure guarantee of heartbreak. not only for himself, but for the woman involved. it would be crazy to start something he didn't intend to finish. the easiest thing for both he and elizabeth was to stop playing footsie under the table and get on with being friends. at the end of the week, when she was able to drive and her rental house was available to move into, she would go back to her life and he would get on with his. no big deal.

he moved closer to the edge of the soccer field and watched mandy race across the gra.s.s as she chased the elusive ball. she and her new friends squealed with excitement when she connected with her toe. the ball landed far short of the goal, but no one cared, least of all mandy. she raced over to him and grinned.

”did you see me kick it?” she asked, panting.

”you bet.” he ruffled her bangs, then gave her a little push. ”go back to the game, honey.”

”okay, travis: she raced off.

he shoved his hands into his uniform trouser pockets. he was supposed to be taking care of paperwork back at the station. but this morning when elizabeth had asked him if he could take mandy to soccer practice, he hadn't been able to say no. time was ticking by too quickly and he wanted be with the little girl as much as possible.

he wanted to spend time with her mother, as well, but that was dangerous. and confusing. what the h.e.l.l was going on with him? he should be pleased that elizabeth was well enough to spend the afternoon with rebecca at the office learning about her new job. she was certainly excited enough to be out of the house. but he'd hated dropping her off at the child services center. it wasn't because he didn't want her to have a job or be independent, it was that he didn't like the reminder that she was leaving.

”you thinking about taking on a new coaching job he turned and saw austin walking toward him. as always, his friend was dressed in jeans and cowboy boots. a small gold hoop hung in one earlobe. he looked like a modern-day pirate.

”just baby-sitting,” travis said, pointing to mandy. ”what about you?”

”one of the deputies told me you'd be out here,” austin said, stopping beside him. ”i wanted to let you know i'm going to be out of town for a few days.”

”vacation?” travis asked, then grinned. to the best of his knowledge austin had never taken a vacation.

”nope. i'm giving a paper at a conference in france. technical stuff. i'll be gone about five days: ' travis nudged his friend with his elbow. ”you know what they say about french women, buddy. have a great time.”

”are you going to start living vicariously, now that you've got the hots for elizabeth?”

travis started to deny the statement, then figured, why bother?”

”you saw?

”sunday, at your place? sure. the way you two were looking at each other, you about set the table on fire.”

”it's more than s.e.x.”

”then you've got a problem.”

travis looked at the field where mandy was in the middle of the young crowd of soccer players. she darted left, the ball went right and she landed on her rump. he could hear her laughter from across the field. involuntarily, he smiled.

”you know anything about being a father?” he asked.”

”no.”

”me, neither. except i wouldn't want to be like my old man. i'd want to be more interested in my kids than in other women.”

”so be more interested in your kids.” ”

”as simple as that?”

”why make it hard?”

it made sense, travis thought, in a twisted, austin sort of way. ”you have any kids?”

for the first time since they'd started talking austin smiled. ”i'm very careful.”

”i just bet you are. you don't want any gold digger getting a part of your money.”

austin glanced at the playing field, then looked back at travis. for once his guard wasn't up and travis was able to see past the usual blankness in his cold gray eyes. somothing ugly and painful flared there. something that made travis want to apologize for ever bringing up relations.h.i.+ps, women or kids.